Mages' Pride
by tyrna
Summary: Cassandra Amell is a mage and Grey Warden. Follow her through her adventures, including meeting both a bastard prince and a wanted apostate. Warden/Alistair and Warden/Anders.
1. Harrowing Event

Trying a different format this time. The first part of the chapter will focus on Origins, while the second half (.5) will focus on Awakenings. I will also have one or two chapters eventually with DA 2. Meet Cassandra Amell, my ultimate playthrough, and rebel mage. Alistair/Warden and Anders/Warden. I love me some snarky men.

Mages' Pride

Chapter 1: Harrowing Event

Cassandra Amell stared at the gathering in the Harrowing Chamber: There were a few Senior Enchanters, quite a few Templars, and First Enchanter Irving himself. "Do not be afraid, child," he said, motioning to her. "Please come here." She nodded, stepping carefully away from the Templars who had brought her here. They had pulled her out of bed in the middle of the night, not telling her anything except to get dressed. But now, staring at the lyrium font in the center of the room, she felt more fear and anxiety well up within her. Everyone knew of the Harrowing, but no one knew what it entailed. Those that had been through it were forbidden to speak of it, and apprentices could only make wild guesses as to the needed secrecy. Cassandra knew that some mages did not survive this process, while others feared it enough to ask to be made Tranquil. She shuddered at the thought of losing her identity and magick. Whatever was coming, she'd face it and triumph, like any other test.

"First Enchanter, what is it I must do?" She tried to keep her voice as even as possible, but it still cracked a bit.

"You are to be tested," he replied. "In the Fade."

"The Fade? But why?"

"Because it is the only way for you to show true restraint," Knight Commander Greagoir answered, coming up behind Irving, a scowl on his face.

"Forgive me, Knight Commander, but what do you mean?"

"You will face a demon in the Fade, my dear," Irving explained. "And you must resist whatever temptations it throws at you. If you fail, you will become an abomination, and the Templars will be forced to kill you." Cassandra took an involuntary step back, but she only ended up bumping into one of their armored jailers. She looked up, but saw only shadows behind the helmet. No, there would be no friendly faces in here but the other mages, and even they seemed slightly fearful.

"So if I resist temptation, I am considered safe?"

"You are considered less of a liability, yes," the Knight Commander said. "No mage is ever safe." She bristled at the comment, but nodded slowly, walking towards the font. The mages all held their breaths, and she turned to Irving, smiling.

"I'll see you soon then, First Enchanter."

"May the Maker watch over you," he told her, as she reached towards the font and fell into unconsciousness and the Fade.

* * *

><p>Cassandra blinked a few times, trying to gain her bearings. She was in the Fade, that much she could tell from the landscape. Quickly calling a bit of mana to her hand, she conjured a small flame, and none too soon. A wisp came at her, but she easily drove it off with her magick, and she smiled. "Well, now to find this demon."<p>

"Find a demon? Are you insane?" a small voice at her feet demanded. She looked down, hardly believing what she saw: A mouse was sniffing at her shoes, and she bent down to get a better look. However, a moment later, it stood up in the form of a man!

"What by the Maker are you?" she wondered, stepping back.

"I was once like you," he replied, a sheepish grin on his face. "A young mage forced to endure the Harrowing. Only, I never made it back."

"Wait, you accepted a demon's offer?"

"No! Nothing like that! I just took too long, and the Templars decided I had become an abomination, so they killed me. But my consciousness remained here, in the Fade. Now every so often I see other mages like you coming here. All of them fail."

"All of them?" The fear was back, like a heavy knot in her chest.

"Well, I suppose there's still hope for you," he said with a shrug. "My name's Mouse, by the way. Or at least, that's what I call myself now."

"I'm Cassandra. Tell me, Mouse, where is the demon I need to face? Have you seen it?" He looked around, like he expected an attack.

"There are a few demons here in this realm, but I think the one you need to face is a rage demon. They're very aggressive, and love to just burn mages to ash."

"I thought I was supposed to be tempted?"

"You trust the Templars to tell you the truth?" he asked bitterly.

"No… I suppose not." She hated being confined by them, even if it was "law". Not all of them were bad, but the good ones were usually reassigned before they could acquire too much "sympathy" for the mages. It infuriated her that she needed to tiptoe around them, when in all honesty; she could probably take on most of the initiates herself. "So, I just need to fight this demon and win?" Mouse stared at her.

"You make it sound so easy! Have you ever fought a demon before?"

"No, but I don't have much of a choice, do I? It's either fight it, or be killed if I take too much time, like you were. No offense, but I'm not cut out to spend the rest of existence as a spirit, Mouse."

"Well, maybe you could get help. There's some sort of benevolent Spirit roaming around here, somewhere."

"Then let's go find him." Again, he stared at her.

"Wait, us? You want me to come with you?"

"Why not? You already warned me about the danger I'd be facing, might as well come with me to see if I actually succeed."

"You talk as if you'll win." She quirked an eyebrow, one hand on her hip as a smirk curled her lip.

"I will." He shook his head, assuming the mouse form again as she headed off, looking for the other Spirit. She found him a short time later, near what seemed to be a forge, with weapons sitting on various racks. It appeared to be a man in armor, much like a Templar, and she hesitated. Finally, pragmatism won out, and she approached. "Greetings, Spirit." It turned, but she could see no face beneath the helmet it wore.

"What's this? Another mortal sent to do battle against a demon? Can your people not think of a better way than this?"

"You've seen others like me?"

"Yes," the Spirit replied with a nod. "Many times. Always it is the same thing, though. They come here, they fight the demon, and then they die."

"No one has ever bested the demon that lives here?"

"Well, there are a few that live here, but not the main one. Not the one whose realm this truly is."

"And why are you here, Spirit?"

"Please, call me Valor. I am here to try and aid those seeking to kill the demon. Though I must admit, you are the first who has approached me."

"But, why? Surely my fellow mages would've sought help?"

"They thought they could triumph on their own." Cassandra ground her teeth for a moment, frustrated by the lack of common sense her previous fellows had shown. If it won you the battle, where was the harm in asking for help? They were not armored warriors, and even a squad of mages needed protection every so often.

"Well, I'm not stupid. Spirit, is there any aid you can offer me against the demon?" Valor tilted his armored head, and she felt like she was being assessed.

"I can offer you a weapon of my own creation to better focus your power. However, you must defeat me in combat, so that I may know your worth."

"Defeat you in combat?" Cassandra couldn't keep the surprise or scorn out of her voice. "Valor, if I thought I could defeat you, I wouldn't need to ask for your help."

"He's not going to do anything for you. Let's leave," Mouse suggested, scampering back and forth.

"Not yet, Mouse. I do need help, whether he's willing to give it or not."

"And what would you suggest then, mortal?"

"I would suggest that you simply aid me, without any tests. I cannot beat you in combat, and you are a fool to have thought otherwise." The Spirit seemed to not like that comment, but she pressed on. "I am fighting for my life: For my very existence, Valor. If you are a benevolent Spirit, like Mouse says you are, help me because it is the right thing to do. Otherwise, you will just watch me walk to my death, like the others before me." The Spirit sighed, which she found mildly amusing. Walking back towards the "forge", it pulled a staff off a rack of weapons, and handed it to her.

"Take this then, and face the demon properly armed. It is the only thing I can do."

"It will have to suffice then," Cassandra said, taking the staff. "Thank you."

"Do not thank me yet, mortal. Only time will tell if you succeed." Cassandra and Mouse headed off, and she soon spied what looked like a bear lying in the middle of the path. Closer inspection revealed that the "bear" was covered in spikes, and had patches of fur missing, showing the muscle underneath. "What is that?" Mouse was hiding behind her, squeaking softly.

"Another demon, but not the one you need to face. I don't trust it."

"And I don't like being disturbed," the demon replied with a yawn, stretching out its front paws. "Are you a morsel, come to offer yourself to me, little one?"

"I should say not!" he shot back, becoming human again.

"Well, now that is a neat trick you've picked up," the bear said, opening one eye.

"What are you?" Cassandra asked, trying not to get too close.

"I am Sloth, or at least, one of the Sloths. Why do you disturb my slumber, mortal?" She swallowed nervously, and Mouse stayed behind her.

"I am looking for help to fight the demon that rules here."

"Well, you seem to have the morsel, and that weapon. What more help could you possibly need?"

"Well, having a mouse fighting isn't exactly the best idea. A bear would be better." The demon snorted, and Mouse looked hurt.

"It's not my fault I'm so small."

"Then change your form." Both of them stared at the demon, puzzled.

"Change his form? Is that possible?"

"Of course. Not easy for you, but for someone that let go of his natural form long ago, it wouldn't take much."

"Can you teach him?"

"No. Too much effort." The bear rolled over, putting its head on its paws.

"You can't just give us hope and then refuse to give aid!" Again, it lifted its head and stared at her with one eye.

"I can't? I am a demon, little mortal. I do what I choose, when I choose it. And I am choosing to take a nap and ignore you." Mouse tugged on her robe, but she ignored him. There was no way she was leaving with nothing.

"Is there any way to convince you to teach him?"

"Maybe we should just go-" Mouse started.

"Wouldn't you like to become a bear? It's definitely better than what you are now." He sighed, and the demon got to its feet, both eyes open.

"Very well, mortal. If you wish me to teach your friend, you must entertain me. Answer three riddles correctly, and I shall do what you ask."

"That's it? Three riddles, and he becomes a bear?"

"Or I get to devour the both of you if you answer incorrectly." Cassandra rolled her eyes. Of course. There was always a catch, wasn't there?

"Ask your questions then, Sloth."

"Very well. My first question is this: I have seas with no water, coasts with no sand. Towns without people, and mountains without land. What am I?" Cassandra thought for a moment, and then smiled.

"A map." Sloth didn't even appear fazed.

"Hmph. Correct. The second riddle: I am rarely touched, but often held. If you have wit, you'll use me well. What am I?" Her smiled turned into a smirk.

"Too easy, demon. My tongue."

"Yes, your witty tongue. Fair enough. One more try, shall we?" The demon still hadn't moved, but Cassandra thought he seemed bothered by her answering correctly. Well, he was going to have to teach Mouse after this last one, so it meant he actually had to work at something. "Often will I spin a tale, never will I charge a fee. I'll amuse you an entire eve, but alas, you won't remember me. What am I?" She stared at the bear, folding her arms across her chest. She'd heard this one since she'd been a child.

"A dream."

"You are correct. Rather apropos here in the Fade, no?" The demon stood, staring at them, and Mouse shrunk back a little. "You have won my challenge, and proved yourself an amusing distraction. Now then, little one: I shall teach you my form…" It took a little while, but Mouse was eventually able to turn into a black bear, though without the spikes and patches of fur missing.

"Did I do it?" he asked, sounding happy. "I feel heavy."

"Close enough," Sloth replied. "Now begone, both of you. I must go back to my rest." The two of them crept away from the sleeping demon, and Cassandra knew it was now or never.

"Time to face this rage demon, so I may be done with this place."

"I'll show you where it normally is," Mouse said, assuming his normal, small form again. She followed, hoping that the Templars would indeed give her enough time to finish her test. Things just weren't adding up in her head, but there would be time to sort everything out later. They came to a clearing, and the demon was waiting for them, it seemed. It looked to be made of living flame, or maybe lava, and she could feel the heat from where she stood. Fire spells weren't going to help her now, but she had her staff, Mouse, and another trick up her sleeve if need be.

"So, the Mouse has come again," the demon said, sliding closer. "What tasty treat have you brought me this time?" She wasn't horribly surprised by all this, but Mouse took on human form, standing in front of her.

"Not this time, demon," he told it. "I'm through helping you. This woman gave me something to hope for, and I will pay her back."

"Oh? Mouse betrays me? What a charismatic mortal you must be. Or perhaps just very strong?" She took up a fresh grip on the staff, pointing it at the demon.

"Both," she shot back, firing a bolt of mana at it. The demon was knocked back, giving Mouse time to assume his new form. The two of them attacked the rage demon without mercy, and soon it collapsed in a pile of embers. Cassandra stared at her "guide" as he became human again.

"I… Suppose telling you that I had no choice but to betray those others wouldn't suffice, would it?" She shrugged, folding her arms across her chest.

"If it were anywhere but the Fade, I'd say no. I can understand what one has to do to survive in a place like this. But why choose me?"

"Because you gave me hope, like I said. Hope that maybe… You can help me again." Her eyebrow went up, and he continued. "I think you're just the kind of person who can help me get out of here. Help me get a foothold in the world." Her suspicions were rapidly becoming more fact, and she took a step back.

"Were you ever really a mage like me?" she demanded.

"Of course I was! Or at least, I think I was." Cassandra narrowed her eyes, bringing the staff up in front of her.

"I think that rage demon was only a small part of this test. Show me your true form," she demanded. He grinned then, and her blood ran cold.

"Maybe they are right about you." His voice was deeper now, and had an added echo to it. She froze, watching as he changed form again, but this time to one she didn't know. It was tall, with purple skin, spikes on the shoulders, eyes all across the face, and sharp teeth in a wide mouth. "Simple killing is a warrior's job. The real dangers of the Fade are preconceptions, careless trust… Pride." She could not hope to defeat something so powerful, but she tried not to show fear. "Keep your wits about you, mage. True tests never end." In a flash of light, the demon was gone, and she slipped into darkness. When she awoke, apprentices were gathered around her bed, smiling.

"You did it!" one of her friends said, taking her hand. "You're a true mage now." Cassandra smiled at the girl, curling her fingers around hers.

"That wasn't so hard after all," she lied, still feeling the fear from seeing that demon. Nothing would ever be able to chase that memory from her mind.

* * *

><p><span>Chapter 1.5<span>

"The Keep isn't far now, Commander," the warrior at her side said. Cassandra nodded, wanting to be out of the cold before the rain hit. The whole day had been overcast, but the night had just gotten colder and damper.

"This place certainly is in the middle of nowhere, Mhairi" she replied, leaning on her staff for a moment. A feeling of unease was starting to settle on her, and it was a feeling she'd come to know only too well. But that should not have been possible. She should not be sensing darkspawn so close to-

"Help!" a frightened voice chased any tiredness from her, and a man came running down the road towards them, followed by a group of darkspawn.

"Maker's breath!" Mhairi shouted, drawing her sword.

"Get down!" Cassandra commanded, shooting a ball of flame towards the man. He hit the ground hard, and the flame exploded in the middle of the darkspawn, sending charred bits of them scattering everywhere. Those that weren't immediately killed were cut down by the young warrior's blade. Cassandra quickly pulled the man to his feet, her senses now on full alert. Something was very wrong here. "What happened?"

"Oh Maker, thank you for saving me! It was awful. The darkspawn just surged out of the Keep, cutting down anyone in their path. I was headed for patrol when I heard the screams, and ran as fast as I could to find help."

"Darkspawn attacked the Keep? That doesn't make sense," Mhairi said skeptically, starting to sheath her sword. Cassandra put a hand on her arm.

"Keep your weapon out," she advised. Then she turned to the Keep soldier. "Go find a regular patrol, and quickly. We're probably going to need backup."

"Yes ma'am!" He ran off, and the two women looked up the path, where the outline of Vigil's Keep stood against the darkness.

"We need to hurry."

"Yes Commander. I'm right behind you." Racing towards certain danger, they were at the gates in record time, only to see the common soldiers trying to fight off groups of darkspawn. Fire and lightning crackled on her fingers as Cassandra vented her frustration on the closest groups. The soldiers saw her and Mhairi, and quickly rallied to press what little advantage they had. It took a little while, but eventually they had taken care of any of the blighted creatures that were outside the walls. One of the soldiers came up, looking both fearful and relieved.

"A-Are you the Warden Commander?" he asked. She nodded, allowing a small smile to poke through her serious countenance.

"I am. Gather everyone who was outside and defend the wounded. We'll be going in to look for any survivors." He nodded, calling out to the others, who quickly found a fortified spot by a wall, laying out the wounded as best they could. Cassandra felt bad that she wasn't skilled in healing, but that had never been her forte. Sure, she knew how to generally heal, but she wasn't as good as- She shook her head, stopping herself from remembering. That person was long gone, and she had a Keep to search. "Mhairi, let's go." The warrior nodded, following the mage inside the Keep. Almost immediately, they heard screams from down the hall, and saw a man, probably a servant, trying to outrun some hurlocks. A blast of fire blocked their path for a moment, but the mage did not let up her assault, firing blast after blast from her staff, and adding a lightning bolt in for good measure. Mhairi barely had time to blink before the darkspawn lay dead, and the new Commander leaned heavily against the wall, anger in her eyes.

"Get to safety!" the recruit shouted to the servant, who nodded and fled the way they had come. When they were alone, she faced the mage. "Commander-"

"I'm fine," Cassandra cut her off, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath. "I just… I wasn't expecting to run into this many. To have darkspawn coordinate an attack on a Grey Warden base is… Well, if you'd told me this morning this was going to happen, I would have thought you insane."

"Something else is wrong, though. You seem very tense." She smiled and gave a short laugh, pushing away from the wall.

"Tense is a good way of putting it. Wardens can sense darkspawn, Mhairi. It's like there's an itch in your mind, and no matter how much you try to ignore it, you can't. But for every one of those damned things that you kill, the itch gets a little less noticeable. Right now, I feel like my head is going to grow its own set of legs and walk off on me."

"So we press on?"

"We press on," she replied with a nod. "Hopefully we'll find some help." Down the hallway was a door that led to another section, and they made sure all the adjoining rooms were empty before continuing on. No sooner had they opened the door, than a blast of cold air assailed them. Looking at each other in confusion, the women ran forward, only to see a mage freezing a darkspawn solid. He was standing in front of a pile of bodies, which contained quite a few darkspawn, but also two Templars. Cassandra grimaced, but raised an eyebrow when the mage turned around. Surprise was on his face, and his brown eyes went wide for a moment. With a sheepish look, he put a hand behind his head and smiled nervously.

"Um, I didn't do it," he swore, glancing at the bodies. She folded her arms across her chest, not saying anything. "Hey, I recognize you from the Circle!"

"You do?" She was trying to place his face, but just kept coming up blank. He hadn't been specifically in her class, but perhaps a year or two off?

"Well, I remember seeing you in the halls every so often. Amell, right? That idiot Cullen had a crush on you." Cassandra stared harder, wondering how she could have overlooked him, if he'd noticed her. "Oh, but I can see that I didn't warrant nearly as much attention from you. So, allow me to introduce myself: I am Anders: Mage, and wanted apostate." The way he said the last part made it seem that he was proud of the fact that he'd run from the Circle, and she couldn't help but smile.

"An apostate? At Vigil's Keep?" Mhairi asked out loud.

"Well, it was only supposed to be temporary. A quick stop on our way, and then back to the Circle. And now they're dead. Such a shame."

"So those two were Templars?" Cassandra asked, pointing to the armor-clad men.

"Well, that's what they told me before they clapped me in irons and started dragging me back to the Tower. I mean, if they were just bored knights, they certainly picked the wrong time to be helpful." He grinned, and the two mages shared a smile.

"Well, I'd ask you to stick around, but I imagine you want to get as far away from here as possible." He bowed, still smiling.

"It's been a pleasure ladies, but the open road does call. Good luck slaughtering the darkspawn, though. Maker knows they won't start killing themselves."

"We could only hope." Anders slipped out the door, and Cassandra turned to Mhairi again. "You're not going to ask me why I let him go?"

"It's not my place, Commander. Besides, you're a mage yourself, so you can sympathize with him." The warrior smiled, and the mage found herself liking this girl more and more. If she survived the Joining, she would make a fine Warden.

"Let's go, we've got more Keep to search." Going as quickly as possible, they encountered more servants to save from darkspawn, and just more of the creatures in general. Cassandra was getting rather fatigued with all the fighting, when she heard more commotion from another room. Mhairi threw open the door, charging in. However, she had to duck to avoid the body of a genlock as it smashed into the wall.

"Come at me like you mean it, ya lazy nug humpers!" Cassandra poked her head into the room, eyes wide when she recognized the Dwarf at the far end.

"Oghren!" she called out. He turned, waving, before two genlocks charged at him, and he swung his axe, taking out their legs. She and Mhairi helped him mop up the rest of the bunch, and then the Dwarf came over, smiling.

"Well shave my back and call me an elf! It is you, Warden!" She patted him on the shoulder, shaking her head and grinning. Truth be told, some part of her had missed the crass, drunk warrior.

"What are you doing here?"

"I came to join the Order."

"Oh yes, the drunk Dwarf. He was here when I was sent to get you, Commander. I'm surprised the other Wardens didn't throw him out," Mhairi said in annoyance.

"Well now, if it isn't the recruit with the nice rack." Oghren eyed her up and down, and Cassandra rolled her eyes and tapped his head with her staff. "What?"

"Focus, Oghren. We've got darkspawn to kill."

"Heh, right you are, Warden. Let's go introduce some of those beasties to my foot being up their arse!" He took off down another hallway, and Cassandra gave Mhairi an apologetic smile.

"He grows on you."

"Like a fungus, I'm sure." More fighting, more darkspawn, and a few more survivors counted down the next hour, as they fought upwards towards the roof. Pausing at the door to the outside, the mage again leaned on her staff. Her mana was running low, and she hadn't prepared for an extensive assault. "Commander?"

"I'm tired, as I'm sure you both are. We need to make sure that whatever is out there, we take it out as fast as possible."

"You're speaking my language," Oghren said, hefting his weapon. She nodded, opening the door, and they ran out onto the battlements. However, at the end of the wall, she noticed someone standing there. Getting closer, she realized it was Anders. What in the Maker's name was he doing here? Why hadn't he run? He turned his head as she walked towards him, but now he looked nervous.

"Just between you and me, you might want to be careful before going around the corner," he warned. "The darkspawn that led the attack is over there."

"It is?" She peeked around quickly, seeing a soldier forced off the edge of the roof by a hurlock in fancy armor. Or at least, fancier than she was used to seeing on them. It was standing in front of a human, who was on his knees with a sword held to his neck. "So it is." Then she turned back to the apostate. "Not that I'm complaining, but weren't you supposed to be halfway to the city of Amaranthine by now?"

"Yeah, I'm not so good at this whole "fugitive from justice" thing. See, when I got to the gates, I just… Well, I felt bad about leaving, so I came back to help. And if that means having to kill darkspawn, them just call me a junior Grey Warden."

"I appreciate the concern, Anders."

"Well, I'm no slouch when it comes to magick, so you'll be glad I came back." He pulled back a moment later as she wreathed herself in flames.

"Good to know. Oghren, I'm taking a page out of your book. We hit them hard, fast, and don't let up until their heads crack open. Anders and Mhairi, you two get any others, and keep their hostage alive." Everyone nodded, and Oghren grinned.

"Now we're talking!" Launching a surprise fireball, Cassandra stepped into full view as the Dwarf charged forward, axe already coming down. The normal hurlock holding the hostage found itself sans an arm, and a moment later was burned to ash. Mhairi pulled the older man to his feet, keeping her sword and herself between him and the darkspawn. It only took a few minutes for the normal darkspawn to die, and then the one in fancy armor looked at her… And spoke.

"Do not be thinking this is over, Grey Warden. He will find you yet." A moment later, its head was severed from its body, and Oghren kicked the corpse over.

"That'll teach you to start talking, ya sodding darkspawn." The man whom Mhairi had been protecting now cleared his throat, bowing to Cassandra.

"Commander, I owe you my life. I am Seneschal Varel, stationed here at Vigil's Keep to aid you in ruling the arling."

"I'm just sorry I couldn't get here sooner," she apologized. He nodded, his gaze suddenly fixing on something below them.

"There's a patrol coming up the road. Looks like well-armored soldiers. Hopefully they're more hospitable than our last guests." Cassandra turned, seeing the soldiers as well, and feeling her curiosity rise.

"Let's go meet them then, shall we?"

"As you wish, Commander." The group left the roof, and she cast one last glance at the headless corpse. A talking darkspawn? Now she'd seen everything.


	2. The Wardens

Author's Note: A bit of a heads-up: Cassandra has a skewed view of "love". She usually just likes to sleep with someone, no commitments needed. Her views change as she goes through both Origins and Awakenings, but she still retains that mindset to a degree. When she does actually fall for someone, there is no question: Love means protecting them, caring for them, and being with them. She's kind of like Isabella, but less "I want to sleep with anyone" and more "We're friends... With benefits."

Chapter 2: The Wardens

Ostagar at night was almost peaceful, if you overlooked the fact that an army was encamped at the old fort. Cassandra stared up at the sky, breathing in the smell of trees, smoke, and people. How different this all was from the Tower, and how nice it was to be able to walk around freely. Even the company she kept now was mostly pleasant, if that knight from Redcliffe would just stop second-guessing everything for five minutes. Ser Jory was beginning to grate on her nerves, always prattling on about his wife, or his services to the Arl, or that fact that he'd already proven himself. At least the other two seemed braver. Daveth kept saying he'd do anything to stop the Blight, and their "leader" was the junior Grey Warden, Alistair. He was always ready with a witty remark, or a disparaging one against himself. Whatever this Joining was, she hoped it would be over soon so she could get to know everyone a little bit better. "It's time," Duncan said softly, coming up behind her.

"I'm ready," she told him, a small smile on her face. Ser Jory and Daveth were already in the old temple part of the ruins, where a table stood with a magnificent silver goblet on it. Alistair was there as well, and he blushed when she smiled at him. Oh, this was intriguing. He was shy around women?

"Why all these damn tests?" Jory suddenly said, pacing back and forth.

"Are you blubbering again?" Daveth asked as Cassandra rolled her eyes.

"Have I not proven myself? Have I not earned my place?"

"Maybe this is tradition," the rogue replied with a shrug. "What difference does it make?" Alistair stood near them, quietly observing.

"I just want to make sure my wife is all right. If they'd warned me about all of this… It just doesn't seem fair."

"Would you have come if they'd warned you? The Wardens do what they must."

"Including possibly sacrificing us in some sort of ritual that involves darkspawn blood? This doesn't make any sense."

"I'd sacrifice a lot more if I knew it would end the Blight."

"I would too," Cassandra finally spoke up. "Whatever this ritual is, we must go through with it to become Wardens."

"That's easy for a mage to say," Jory countered. "I've never faced a foe I couldn't engage with my blade."

"So because I understand magick, it makes me less afraid? Ser Jory, has it ever occurred to you that I'm not afraid because there is no point in feeling that way?"

"No point? You aren't afraid of dying?" She shook her head, hugging herself for a moment as she thought of her Harrowing.

"There are worse things than death." Duncan walked past her, reverently lifting the goblet off the table, and turned to face them.

"At last, we come to the Joining. The Grey Wardens were founded during the First Blight, when humanity stood on the verge of annihilation. So it was that the first Grey Wardens drank of darkspawn blood, and mastered their taint." Cassandra's eyes widened, and her arms tightened around her.

"We're going to… Drink the blood of those creatures?" Jory whispered. Even Daveth looked shocked, and her feeling of unease grew again. Magick she understood, but this sounded almost like blood magick.

"As the first Grey Wardens did before us, and as we did before you. This is the source of our power, and our victory." Victory? The words seemed a bit cryptic, but she was too nervous to ask their meaning.

"Those who survive the Joining become immune to the taint," Alistair explained. "We can sense it in the darkspawn, and use it to slay the archdemon."

"Those who survive?" she asked softly.

"Not all who drink the blood will survive," Duncan replied. "And those who do are forever changed. This is why the Joining is a secret. It is the price we pay." Everything had a price, she already knew that. To be a mage, you had to be locked up. To be recognized as "safe", you took the Harrowing. And to be a Grey Warden, you apparently had to become tainted. Oh, the Maker had a sense of humor.

"Let's get this over with, then." Her voice was still soft, but carried her determination, and Duncan nodded approval.

"We speak only a few words prior to the Joining, but these words have been said since the first. Alistair, if you would?" The younger man nodded, bowing his head. As he spoke, it almost sounded like a prayer, and Cassandra felt a stir in the air. It wasn't magick, per se, but it was definitely something.

"Join us, brothers and sisters. Join us in the shadows where we stand, vigilant. Join us as we carry the duty that cannot be forsworn. And should you perish, know that your sacrifice will not be forgotten. And that one day, we shall join you." When she looked up, Daveth seemed a bit more relaxed, but Jory looked positively terrified. She shook her head, hands curling into fists. This was just one more test, and she would pass it. There was nothing to be afraid of. She would either become a Grey Warden, or be brought to the Maker's side.

"Daveth, step forward," Duncan commanded. The rogue did so, taking the goblet and pausing only a moment before drinking a little. The reaction was almost instant: He doubled over, gasping, hands grabbing his throat as he struggled to breathe. Looking up, his eyes had gone solid white, and Cassandra took a step back.

"Maker's breath!" Jory swore, also backing up. Daveth cried out, dropping to his knees, and Duncan shook his head.

"I am sorry, Daveth." A moment later, the struggles ceased, and the rogue collapsed on the ground, unmoving. She did not need to be a healer to know that he was dead, and she closed her eyes.

_'Andraste guide your soul to the Maker, Daveth. I will not forget you.'_ Jory was still backing up, panic clear on his face. Duncan looked over at him, and he drew his sword. "What are you doing?"

"I didn't sign up for this!" he shouted back. "I have a wife at home, and a child on the way. I will not die for this!"

"Stop it!" she chastised him, seeing Duncan draw a dagger from his waist after putting the goblet down. "You could survive, Jory. Don't make your wife a widow for no reason. Show some courage."

"I refuse to drink that vile stuff!" Duncan came at him, and Jory attacked, but the older man had not survived as long as he had to be bested by a mere knight. He easily parried the longer blade, driving the dagger between Jory's ribs.

"I am sorry," he whispered to the dying man, as Alistair and Cassandra looked on in horror. Duncan pulled his weapon free, and the knight's body dropped to the ground, blood spreading in a pool around him. "But the Joining is not yet complete." Again Duncan picked up the goblet, and walked towards her. She met his eyes; steeling herself for the pain this would probably bring her. Taking the goblet, she closed her eyes and drank the blood. It tasted disgusting, and she shook her head. A moment later, it felt like her entire body was on fire, and she doubled over, the breath forcing itself from her lungs. She couldn't see, but then… She could. In front of her was a dragon, but one that looked corrupted, tainted. It roared, and the sound was deafening. Trying to scream, knowing she couldn't, and feeling nothing but pain, Cassandra welcomed the darkness that enveloped her.

* * *

><p>"It is finished," she heard Duncan say. Slowly opening her eyes, she saw him and Alistair standing over her, looking relieved. "Welcome."<p>

"Thank you," she whispered, still tasting the blood.

"In my Joining, only one of us died," Alistair told her. "It was still horrible."

"Maybe only one of us would've died if Jory had just listened."

"Sometimes we cannot predict what will break us," Duncan said wisely, putting a hand on her shoulder. "I am just glad that one of you made it."

"I saw something when I passed out."

"There will be time to explain everything to you. Right now, we have been called to a strategy meeting with King Cailan. When you are ready, please head to the center of the ruin. I will meet both of you there." Duncan headed off, and then Alistair handed her a pendant. It was a small vial with what looked like blood in it.

"All right, I know that's not a phylactery, so what is it?" He stared at her, eyes wide, and then blushed.

"Right, sorry. I keep forgetting you're a mage. This is a pendant we make out of some of the blood from your Joining. It's a reminder… Of those who didn't make it." She nodded, slipping the chain over her neck and tucking it under her robe. He tugged a chain out from his armor, showing her his own pendant, and they smiled.

"So, shall we see what the King needs from us?"

"Lead the way, my Lady," he said with a bow. Cassandra headed towards where Duncan had gone, knowing that now, everything was going to change.

* * *

><p><span>Chapter 2.5<span>

The patrol on the road was none other than the royal escort for King Alistair, and she bowed in respect as he approached. "Well, it seems I missed all the fun," he quipped, seeing the soldiers burning the darkspawn corpses. "Here I was coming to greet the new Warden Commander properly, and it turns out the darkspawn had their own ideas for a welcoming party." She sighed and shook her head, standing up.

"Sure you can't stay, for old times' sake?" she asked, winking at him. It was Alistair's turn to sigh, and he frowned.

"As much as I'd love to, I have kingdom to try and rule. You remember: The throne you made me take, and the Queen you told me to marry?" His tone was slightly teasing, but she couldn't help but feel a pang of regret for making him do the right thing. "So unfortunately, you're on your own for now."

"Hey, what am I? Chopped nug livers?" Oghren demanded.

"From the smell, that's not a bad guess," Anders shot back.

"Damn comedian mage… Look, I came here to join the Grey Wardens, and it looks like you could use all the help you can get. Where's the giant cup? I'll gargle and spit!" Both Cassandra and Alistair sighed heavily as they pictured that scene.

"Oghren… First off, no gargling. Second, we'd be happy to have you," she told him. He smiled and winked at her, and Mhairi grimaced.

"I suppose all are welcome in this dire time," she reasoned.

"We had all sorts of help on our quest," Alistair remembered fondly. "A Sister, an assassin, a mage, a golem, an evil witchy-woman…"

"Who we owe our lives too," Cassandra reminded him.

"Well, good luck with joining the Wardens," Anders said with a small smile.

"King Alistair, be careful!" a woman said as she pushed her way to his side. Cassandra took a small step back, seeing the Templar insignia on her armor. "This man is a dangerous criminal."

"Who, Oghren?" Alistair asked, slightly surprised. "No, he only looks-"

"She means me," Anders said, hanging his head. Dangerous criminal? Aside from escaping the Tower, what else had he done?

"I am Captain Rylock, and he is an apostate my men were in the process of bringing back to the Circle… Again. To face justice."

"Justice? Hah! The things you people know about justice wouldn't fill a thimble! Besides, I'll just escape again." He was either very brave, or very foolish, for goading a Templar like this. Cassandra was starting to like him.

"Never! I'll see you hanged for what you've done here, murderer." Anders pulled back, both shocked and annoyed at her accusation.

"Murderer? But the darkspawn killed those men! I never- Oh what's the point? You wouldn't believe me anyway."

"Fetch me some irons!" Rylock called back her people.

"Not so fast," Cassandra said, putting an arm in front of her fellow mage. "I hereby conscript this man into the Grey Wardens."

"What? Never!" She raised an eyebrow at the Templar, her gaze moving to Alistair. He was smiling.

"The Wardens do still retain the Right of Conscription, Captain. I am allowing this." Rylock frowned, bowing her head.

"If… If your Majesty feels this is wise." Turning on her heel, she went back to the other Templars, and Cassandra smirked.

"Well kid, looks like you get to be a Warden for real now!" Oghren said with a laugh. She turned to face the other mage, and he looked both relieved and apprehensive. Not that she blamed him for either feeling.

"Me? A Grey Warden? I guess that will work."

"I look forward to fighting at your side, ser mage," Mhairi told him. Alistair turned to the patrol, then back to the Warden Commander.

"Um, if I may have a word with you in private, Commander?" he asked, a blush tinting his cheeks. She nodded, still smirking. They headed around a corner, and then she was pressed into the wall, his body against hers as his mouth seemingly devoured her. "Maker's breath, I've missed you," he panted when they broke the kiss.

"I've missed you too," she confessed, hands around his waist. If only he wasn't wearing all that heavy armor…

"Cassie…. I… I don't know if I can be a good king without you there to guide me. And you had my marry Anora… She's not exactly the most welcoming woman."

"Ferelden needed you, Alistair. I couldn't be that selfish to want you all to myself. Not when you were willing to share me." He sighed and nodded, kissing her again.

"I love you, Cassandra. I always will."

"I love you too. For someone who never thought they could fall in love, you certainly changed my mind. Anora will see what a good man you are, and she'll come around. And if not… Well, maybe mages should be allowed to hold titles."

"That would be something to see, wouldn't it? Queen Cassandra, the Hero of Ferelden, and mage extraordinaire." He suddenly stopped smiling, and hugged her closer. "Just… Promise me something, okay?"

"I won't die, Alistair. Not unless another archdemon shows up."

"No, it's not about that. Just… I know I can't ask you not to be you, but… Try not to fall in love with anyone out here." She blinked, staring at him with her jaw gone slack.

"You think I'd find love out here? My dear King, you either overestimate the potential of Amaranthine, or you doubt my sincerity when I say I love you."

"I don't doubt you, Cassie. I know you don't lie about stuff like that. I guess some part of me just fears that you'll never come back."

"I will always come back to you," she swore, caressing his cheek. "Now, whether I come back alone is another matter. Would you really be upset if I **did** find another love? You allow me to share my bed, but not my heart?" He sighed, knowing that he was just nervous to be away from her.

"As long as I'm still in your heart, I guess it's okay. But… Promise me that if it happens, you'll let me know?"

"I promise. Now we should head back before they get suspicious." He captured her lips one last time, and she hugged him as much as she was able to. When they broke apart, he returned to his soldiers, and they left the Keep. She stood next to Mhairi, watching them go. "Be safe, my King. I'll kill enough darkspawn for both of us."

"Commander, before we begin the Joining, there is another matter for you to attend to," Seneschal Varel spoke up. "It concerns a prisoner we captured before the attack. It took four Wardens to bring him down." She quirked an eyebrow.

"Four Wardens? That is impressive. Show me this prisoner then." Varel nodded, and led the way to the cells.

* * *

><p>The four potential Wardens stood in the throne room of the Keep, staring at each other, and the goblet that Seneschal Varel held. Cassandra had thankfully recovered it when she'd gone back to Ostagar to retrieve Cailan's personal effects as well. She sighed, her mind wandering to Alistair, and how handsome he'd looked in that gleaming gold armor. "We speak only a few words before the Joining," Varel said, looking at the group before him. She snapped herself back to the task at hand, her gaze coming to rest on each of them. Oghren, looking bored. Anders, looking apprehensive. Nathaniel, looking annoyed. And Mhairi, watching everything with excitement flashing in her eyes. As Varel intoned the ritual's words, she bowed her head, remembering her own Joining. "Join us, brothers and sisters. Join us in the shadows where we stand, vigilant. Join us as we carry the duty that cannot be forsworn. And should you perish, know that your sacrifice will not be forgotten. And that one day, we shall join you." He handed the goblet to Oghren, who raised an eyebrow and frowned.<p>

"What is this, the sampler size? Trying to say something about my height?"

"This is the cup we've always used," Varel replied, a bit puzzled.

"Oghren, just drink it," Cassandra commanded gently.

"Fine, fine." He took it and almost chugged it, before Varel pulled it back lest he actually drink it all. "Mm, not bad." His eyes were white, and he belched loudly. However, since it was Oghren, she wasn't surprised that he didn't pass out.

"How very… Odd," Varel said, shaking his head and passing the cup to Anders.

"So, we drink darkspawn blood? That's it?"

"That's it," she said, trying to sound cheerful.

"Sounds easy enough." He took a sip, and a moment later coughed, his eyes going white. Cassandra felt a knot start in her chest as he toppled over, but Varel immediately checked him.

"Commander, you'll be pleased to know that you are no longer the only Warden mage at the Keep." She smiled slightly, feeling the knot uncurl a bit. Next was Nathaniel, who practically grabbed the cup from Varel.

"The moment of truth," he whispered, drinking. He teetered for a moment, and then collapsed to the floor.

"The Howe is stronger than he looks."

"All the better to be able to prove himself." Now it was Mhairi's turn, and she smiled at Cassandra, who returned it. The knot in her chest was still partially there, and she gripped her Joining pendant tightly. _'Please let there be no deaths. Maker please, just let them all survive.'_

"I have waited for this moment," the warrior said, drinking. However, she doubled over, gasping. Cassandra's eyes widened in horror, and even Oghren stepped back. Mhairi looked up, staring at the Commander, but her white-shrouded eyes couldn't truly see anymore.

"I'm sorry," the mage said, as Mhairi collapsed to the floor. Varel checked her, but when he shook his head, Cassandra closed her eyes. _'Maker take you to his side, Mhairi. You would have made a fine Warden.'_

"Three out of four is very good, Commander."

"I know, Varel. I'll prepare the pendants myself." She took the goblet, heading for one of the workshops in the Keep. Oghren followed her, and she allowed it, beginning the task of filling the vials and sealing them.

"So… Guess having a great rack doesn't mean you'll survive the Joining," he said after a few minutes of silence.

"Oghren!" she turned from her work, staring at him in horror. He put his hands up like he expected her to hit him. With the way she was feeling, she just might.

"Sorry Commander, but I'm not good at all that… Comfort and mushy stuff."

"Then why are you here?"

"Well, you listened to me when that whole thing with Branka happened. I figured I owed it to you to try and do the same."

"I… Appreciate the effort. Really. But I'm used to losing people. Mhairi and I didn't really know each other, I just feel bad for her. She was so eager to join, and most recruits aren't. If you want to help, just kill as many darkspawn as you can in her memory." He smiled, putting a hand to his chest in salute.

"That is something I know a thing or two about. Don't worry, Commander, I'd even take down a sodding archdemon for that girl's honor."

"Thank you," she said with a smile, returning to her task, which the Dwarf left her to finish. When she was done, she headed for the infirmary, where both Nathaniel and Anders were now awake. She handed them the pendants, and both stared at her in confusion. "It's tradition that we take some of the blood from the ritual and make a pendant from it. To remind us of those that didn't make it."

"That's a bit morbid," Nathaniel said, tucking it into a pocket and standing up. "Well, now that I'm officially a Grey Warden, I'm going to take a look around the Keep and see what's changed." He left, and she felt a hand on her arm and turned to see Anders, who was smiling slightly.

"I think it's a good reminder," he said, putting the pendant on. "So, if you don't mind me asking, how many survived your Joining?" She shook her head and sighed, showing him the vial she wore.

"Just me," she whispered.

"I'm sorry. I know you're the Hero and all, but… That must've still been a hard thing to see."

"It was. Maybe I'll tell you the story one day, if you're really interested." He nodded, getting to his feet, his hand still on her arm.

"I'd like that. We mages need to stick together, you know." He took a step, and then turned back, grinning. "So, is it just me, or does this thing remind you of a phylactery?"

"I thought the same thing."

"Commander?"

"Hm? She looked up, and he had a serious look on his face.

"Thanks for sticking up for me with those Templars. I owe you my life."

"I'll hold you to that, one day."


	3. Casual Trysts

Chapter 3: Casual Trysts

Camp was becoming more and more crowded, and Cassandra couldn't help but marvel at the group they had put together so far. Morrigan still kept to herself whenever they stopped for the night, but everyone else clustered together and mostly got along. Lelianna was currently cooking dinner, Sten and Shale were on watch, Oghren was getting drunk, and Zevran was off teasing Alistair about still being a virgin. She was busy playing with Dane, who currently had her on the ground as he licked her. "Get off, you big brute!" she playfully yelled, trying to push the Mabari off her. "This is why I prefer cats!" He whined a little, but backed off.

"My, my, it appears someone does not know how to be a gentleman," Zevran chuckled as he came over. "You must always do as a lady wishes," he admonished. Dane wagged his tail, walking off towards Sten. The Elf extended a hand to her, which she accepted, and he pulled her to her feet.

"Thank you, Zevran. At least one of you has some manners."

"Ah my dear, maybe I was merely jealous of our slobbering friend's proximity to you?" He smirked a little, and she raised an eyebrow, resting one hand on her hip.

"Were you?" He shrugged, casting a quick glance at the camp.

"Perhaps. After all, you are our leader, and a marvelous one at that. Also, I do still owe you my life."

"Trust me, Zevran, I didn't have anything pleasant in mind for you when we first captured you," she revealed. "But since you told us their plans, I decided to have mercy." He was suddenly behind her, hands on her shoulders, his breath tickling her ear.

"And just what delicious torture did you have planned for me, hm?" She shivered, and his hands slowly slipped down her arms. "Perhaps I would have enjoyed your attentions, Warden. Even more than I do now." He encircled her waist, pulling her flush against him, and she leaned back into his embrace.

"Zevran, you are such a tease." He chuckled, spinning her around to face him.

"And just how would you have me fix that?" She smiled, dipping her head and kissing him before he could react. She grabbed his hips, even as his own grip went slack, and she held them together until she broke the kiss.

"I could think of a few ways to make it up to me."

"You are a crafty woman."

"My tent. Tonight. Let's see just how much you learned from that brothel you grew up in." He arched an eyebrow, smiling slightly.

"Just what do they teach you in that Tower of yours?" he wondered. She shook her head, stepping back from him.

"Repression. It was up to us to find ways of relieving that. Some of us were more… Creative than others."

"Hey you two, dinner is ready," Alistair called out as he walked over.

"We'll be right there." Zevran took her hand and kissed it.

"Tonight, my beautiful mage." He headed back towards the fire, and her fellow Warden came up to her, looking confused.

"Was I interrupting something?" he asked, looking from the Elf to her and back again. She smiled, running a hand down his arm.

"We were just discussing some arrangements for later." He blushed, and pulled away from her touch.

"Cassandra, I thought-" She put a finger to his lips, moving in front of him.

"Alistair, I made myself quite clear when you gave me that rose: I have never really known love, just lust. Mages are kept trapped with each other; told day after day that we are dangerous, cursed beings. The Templars will not give us comfort, and so we turn to each other. But nothing lasts, and you must guard your heart constantly, lest you break if something happens to your lover. It is just something we understand; the unwritten rule, as it were. I am not a normal person-"

"Yes, you are!" he told her, hands gripping her shoulders. "I don't care that you're a mage, Cassandra. I never did. You're a Grey Warden, like me. And we've been through a lot together. I… I guess I was hoping you'd think I was special."

"You are special, Alistair."

"Then why are you going to sleep with the assassin?"

"Because he won't expect a commitment from me. Love means more to you than it does me. You are a kind, gentle person, Alistair. I would hate to break your heart."

"You're breaking it now," he told her, hanging his head and walking away. She stood staring at him, feeling something very much like regret claw its way into her chest.

"By the flames!" she swore softly. "I warned you, Alistair. Don't put this on me. I never asked for any of this. I…" An image popped into her mind: Long, blonde hair, green eyes the color of new leaves, and a laugh that sounded like a musical sigh. Cassandra hugged herself tight, squeezing her eyes shut. The Tower was the last place they needed to go. Her people needed to aid them in the Blight, or else all might be lost. "I will take you with me," she said to no one, remembering the feel of that soft, pale skin beneath her fingers; hearing the words they'd spoken to each other years ago:

_'You are my first, and my love. Never forget that. You will always be special to me, no matter how much time passes or who else comes to our beds.'_

_'You are my rock, Cassie. With you, I know I can survive anything. Don't ever leave my side. I love you.'_

"Deborah, I'm coming back. Don't worry."

* * *

><p>She awoke from a dream, repressing a scream that was halfway out of her mouth before she could stop herself. Beside her, he stirred, rolling over to look at her, and then immediately sitting up when he saw the look on her face. "Cassandra?"<p>

"Just a nightmare," she told him, trying to calm her racing heart.

"The archdemon?" She shook her head as he hugged her, and she allowed herself to relax into his embrace.

"No. The Tower." Images crowded her mind, but she pushed them back with all the will she could muster. No, never again could she allow herself to be like that. But it felt like there was a piece of her that was missing: A piece she would never be able to get back. All those years of being together, all the times they'd shared… And she'd failed.

"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked softly, still holding her.

"There isn't anything else to say. I failed them. I left the Tower to become a Grey Warden, and didn't want to return there. But in the meantime, they were suffering. If only I'd gone back right away. If I'd never left in the first place-"

"Then maybe you would be dead," he interrupted. "Or an abomination of Uldred's creation. You couldn't have known what was happening at the Tower. None of us could have predicted that."

"Those were my people. My family, Alistair."

"At least your little brother is all right. That's something, isn't it?" She nodded, wiping her eyes before the tears that were there could fall.

"I owe Wynne and the others a lot for helping him and the other children. Once this Blight is over, maybe I can bring Richard with me, or something. I just don't want him in that place anymore. With our older brother… Gone, I just can't leave him."

"We'll figure something out," he promised, kissing the top of her head.

"Alistair?"

"Yes?" He drew out the sound, and she snickered softly.

"What did this mean?" She gestured to their clothes at the far end of the tent, running her hands down his bare chest.

"I know what it meant to me," he began hesitantly. "But I'm not sure what it meant to you. You needed comfort, and… And if this is how you could get it, I'm glad you trusted me enough."

"I never wanted to hurt you," she said, looking into his eyes. "But with Zevran and even Lelianna, I didn't really feel anything. There was just the usual wanting to connect to them, but it was only a physical thing."

"Am I only a physical thing?" She heard the hurt in his tone, like he was expecting her to throw him out any moment.

"I don't know," she confessed after a few minutes of silence. "But this is still too fresh for me to be sure. I need to think on things, Alistair, so that I don't hurt you any more than I have. You don't deserve that." She buried her head in his chest again, and he hugged her tightly, allowing her to just feel safe.

"I'm sorry," he whispered. "That I'll never meet her."

"She would have liked you. She would have liked everyone. Maker, I'm going to miss her so much." The tears came again, and Cassandra Amell, Grey Warden, and mage, cried for those she had been too late to save. And Alistair Theirin, Grey Warden, and ex-Templar, gave what little comfort he could to the woman he loved.

* * *

><p>Chapter 3.5<p>

Life at the Keep wasn't unpleasant, though Cassandra still wasn't used to everyone calling her "Commander" and bowing to her every so often. Even most of her immediate companions were very formal, though she didn't think Justice could be much else. The Spirit was still getting used to being in their world, though he and Velanna generally got into arguments about her attacks on the caravans, which the Dalish still refused to apologize for. She was sitting on the hill leading up the Keep, enjoying the fresh air and relative peace and quiet. Beside her, an orange tabby sat, cleaning his paws. Cassandra had found him walking around the Keep after the darkspawn had been dealt with, and now every time he saw her, the cat would follow and just sit with her. Hearing footsteps, both of them turned. "Oh, there you are, Commander. I was just- A kitty!" Anders' expression went from neutral to excited so quickly, she would have sworn he had just turned into a child.

"You like cats?" she asked as he dropped to his knees to pet the small creature.

"Who doesn't? Well, I guess that's a silly question in Ferelden. You're more attached to your dogs." He was grinning, and the cat purred and rubbed against him.

"You talk like you're not from here."

"Because I'm not." She couldn't keep the surprise off her face, and he chuckled. "Well, I'm from the Anderfels originally. Hence my name."

"Wait… Your parents named you after the region you were born in?"

"Ah no," he replied, rolling his eyes a bit. "That would've just been silly. When I was brought to the Circle, that's the name the other apprentices gave me. They said my actual name just sounded strange. And before you ask, I don't really remember my name. So I'm officially Anders now." Cassandra stared at him, feeling like she had definitely seen him at the Tower. Well, of course she **had**, but his face did seem more familiar than just having passed by in the halls or during studies.

"Were you there?" she asked after a few minutes of hearing nothing but purring. "At the Tower, when everything-"

"When the abominations showed up?" he asked, face contorting in anger. "I was still in solitary when that all happened, but I got out quick when the Templars guarding me were slaughtered."

"Solitary? What were you in there for?" He shrugged, pulling the cat onto his lap and sitting next to her.

"For escaping again. I guess they thought I might break if they locked me up with no one to talk to. Good thing I had Mr. Wiggums." She laughed, and he looked hurt. "What's so funny?"

"Who is Mr. Wiggums?"

"The cat from the Tower. You must've seen him: Grizzled old mouser, patchy fur falling out in places, mostly blind?" Cassandra blinked, realizing that she did indeed know the cat he was referring to.

"That wasn't his name, you know," she told him.

"He didn't have a name, if you recall," Anders shot back, quirking an eyebrow.

"I called him Baron," she said with a soft smile. He looked over, and she blushed slightly. "What? He commanded respect from the other creatures that were there. And no mouse was stupid enough to be caught by him."

"You… Like cats too?"

"What, just because I live in Ferelden, I have to like dogs? I'm not from here either, you know. Well, my family isn't, anyway."

"Where were you taken from?"

"The Free Marches. I can't remember where exactly. But my brothers and I were all brought to the Tower. Otherwise, we'd have wound up in Kirkwall." Both mages grimaced at the thought: It was well known that the City of Chains was no place for a mage, and they were treated worse than criminals. "But anyway, you never answered my question. About that day…" He sighed heavily, tugging at his short ponytail.

"Like I said, when the guards were slaughtered, I got out of there. Unfortunately, it was Mr. Wiggums who killed them, not that I stayed to thank the abomination he'd turned into." Her eyes were wide, and he shook his head. "He was possessed by a Rage demon, but he took out three Templars… Stupid Uldred." Cassandra put a hand on his arm, and he looked up at her.

"I'm sorry, I don't mean to pry. We all lost people we cared about that day."

"I'm just glad that Senior Enchanter Wynne got the kids out. Maker, that would have been horrible for them to-" Anders stopped, watching as her face took on a haunted look, and he berated himself for delving further into it. "Sorry. We were both there. We don't need to go digging up any painful memories." The cat pushed its head into her arm, and she smiled as she scratched him behind one ear. Anders was petting him, the smile back on his face. "So, have you named him yet?"

"No, I haven't," she confessed. "Did you want to?"

"Well, I am pretty good at coming up with names."

"Mr. Wiggums not included?" she teased. He pouted, but her smile just got wider, and he gave up and chuckled.

"How about… Ser-Pounce-A-Lot? That sounds like a noble name, right? Do you like that name, kitty?" The cat turned to him and meowed. "Then it's settled. Hey, maybe he can stay in the Keep, instead of out here?"

"If you want to take responsibility for him, Anders, that's fine."

"Well, he can be our cat." She stared up at him, seeing the look in his eyes, and felt a blush heating up her cheeks.

"Our cat?" He shrugged, leaning closer to her.

"Sure. We're both mages, both Wardens, and both cat lovers. It's only fair that we share Ser-Pounce-A-Lot, since we have so much in common already." He smiled, but it seemed more of a smirk, and her heartbeat quickened.

"If I didn't know any better, Anders, I'd say you were flirting with me."

"Is there some sort of Grey Warden rule against that? Because that certainly wasn't in the handbook when I read it."

"You aren't afraid of having people talk about us? Having the others make comments about me showing favor to you?"

"Commander, you would be the first person in authority **to** show favor to me. Besides, we both know what life was like in the Tower… What you did to make things more bearable." It was his turn to blush, and he looked away for a moment. She put a hand on his cheek and turned him back to her.

"How many?"

"A few," he replied with a shrug. "Just one that really meant something, though." He tilted his head, taking her hand from his face and holding it. "How many?"

"A few. I was lucky to have two that meant something, though." He nodded, and she suddenly leaned in, kissing him softly. He was blushing when she pulled back, but recovered quickly and laughed.

"The Hero and the apostate, eh? You always go for the rebels, Commander?"

"I prefer to think of you as a fellow Warden, Anders." She stood, pulling him to his feet as Ser Pounce twined around their legs. "But do me a favor?"

"Anything you ask."

"My name is Cassandra. I'd prefer that over "Commander". At least when we're alone." He looked thoughtful for a moment, and then smirked.

"What about Cassie?" She frowned and turned away quickly, and he wasn't sure what was wrong. "Don't like your name being shortened?"

"Only two people ever called me that," she told him, voice soft. "One is dead now, and the other… Is the King of Ferelden." Anders' eyes went wide as he connected the dots, and he sighed and hung his head.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean… You love him." She nodded, closing her eyes. "Are you sure this is a good idea, then? I didn't know, Com-" Her finger was on his lips, and she was smiling at him mischievously.

"Cassandra," she repeated. "And yes, I'm sure. We both have no expectations about where this will lead, so it's fine. Just for a while, we can have each other."

"I'd like that," he said, taking her hand. "It's nice be wanted… Well, aside from being a fugitive, I suppose. But you know what I mean." She laughed, curling her fingers around his even as he picked up Ser Pounce with the other hand.

"I do. Come on, let's head back to the Keep."

* * *

><p>It was a few weeks later, and Cassandra was practicing close-combat fighting with Anders. He'd expressed interest in learning the ways of the Arcane Warrior that she'd picked up, and was getting better at them. Both of them preferred their staffs to blades, and she was still in her robes. Anders had found he liked light armor over the typical mage outfit, and he felt like people didn't view him as a mage as easily, either. "So, we're going to Amaranthine to track down Kristoff's wife, right?" They had been confronted at the Keep days before by a woman who had been horrified to see Justice walking around in her husband's body. The Spirit had been bothered by the exchange, and had wanted to set things right with her.<p>

"Yes, although I'm not really certain Justice can give her what she wants."

"You mean the body?" Cassandra nodded, going for a high strike, which he easily blocked. Anders countered with an attempted sweep, which she jumped over.

"He wants to help us, and he's not even sure how he got put in the body to begin with. What happens if he leaves it?" A side strike caught him in the ribs, and he grimaced, quickly tugging her staff and pulling her off balance. She fell against him, and he wrapped an arm around her waist.

"I guess we'll have to trust Justice on this one. By the way: I win!" She frowned, regaining her balance, but not pulling away.

"You're getting very good at this."

"You say that like it's a bad thing."

"Well, I guess this means you don't have to stay so far back from combat now."

"Hey, I'm still delicate, you know. Mages aren't meant for the front lines."

"That's the first smart thing I've ever heard you say," Sigrun teased as she walked up. Cassandra reluctantly pulled away from Anders, not even bothering to explain why she had been in his arms.

"Did you need something?" she asked the Dwarf.

"The infirmary was wondering if they could borrow Anders again. Apparently another patrol encountered darkspawn, and-"

"I'm on it!" he promised, taking off to help the wounded. Cassandra watched him go, feeling a smile curl the edges of her mouth. Anders was always ready to help people, and she admired that about him.

"Commander, I don't mean to pry, but…" Sigrun looked apologetic, and she shrugged, knowing what was coming next.  
>"The answer is yes." The Dwarf looked a little surprised at her bluntness.<p>

"You and Anders? But why? Oghren said that you-"

"Bedded the King of Ferelden?" she interrupted, folding her arms across her chest. "Also true. Why does it matter?"

"I thought humans had different ideas about sex than Dwarves. Don't most humans sleep with people they love?"

"Yes, but that's not always the case."

"Do you love the King?" Cassandra nodded, a blush tinting her cheeks as her mind drifted to Alistair for a moment.

"Of course I do."

"And so you love Anders too?" She shook her head, wondering if it was worth explaining to her.

"Mages are brought up differently than most humans, Sigrun. We have trysts with each other that usually don't go anywhere. There's too much at risk to lay your heart on the line every time you bring someone to your bed."

"Commander, with all due respect, I saw how you two were looking at each other. I know lust… Since every time Oghren looks at me, that's all I see. But you two don't just have that. There's this… I don't know, something else."

"Sigrun, we're both mages. Neither of us are going to fall in love so easily. You're just reading more into things than necessary." The Dwarf sighed, turning around and heading back inside.

"Suit yourself, Commander. But the next time I catch you tucking him into a cot after he passes out from healing people, I'll remind you of this." When she was alone, Cassandra began pacing. She wasn't falling in love; Sigrun was just being silly. No, both of them knew the risks of letting your heart get involved… So why did she feel both giddy and frightened of the thought?

"Andraste's ashes, I'm getting soft," she chastised herself, heading back inside as well. Sigrun's words were true though, and she knew she would be checking up on Anders later, and he probably would be passed out in a cot. "Well, at least he hasn't fallen in love with me. Anders would never be that foolish as to break the unwritten rule."


	4. Love

So less than half this chapter deals with Alistair... Guess I'm more an Anders fangirl than I thought...

Chapter 4: Love

They were on the road to Denerim, only a day behind Arl Eamon and his entourage. He had insisted he go ahead and make sure everything was clear for them to follow. Loghain might still be planning an attack once they reached the city, and Cassandra did not look forward to it. It was only the four of them, lest a large group attract too much attention. Lelianna was scouting ahead, keeping an eye on the trees. Alistair was bringing up the rear, keeping an eye on… Well, probably her rear. Wynne was beside her, and tapped her arm lightly. "Warden, if I could talk to you for a moment?"

"Of course. Is there anything wrong? Did you need to rest?" The older woman chuckled, shaking her head.

"No, my dear, although I appreciate your concern. I actually wanted to talk to you about Alistair." She glanced back at her fellow Warden, who blushed a bit when he caught her gaze.

"What about him?"

"Do you see your relationship with him going anywhere?" Cassandra sighed, knowing that another mage would have been the one to ask her.

"I don't know," she answered honestly. "I don't want to hurt him."

"You do realize that if you continue down this path, you will?" She ground her teeth in annoyance, closing her eyes for a moment.

"I'm not stupid, Wynne, nor am I a child. I have to sort out my feelings, especially after what happened."

"And if you discover that you truly love him, what then?"

"Then we go from there."

"You are both Grey Wardens, and he is the rightful heir to the throne. Duty will not allow you to stay together."

"You think I don't know that?" she hissed, hands clenching into fists. "I know that Alistair belongs on that throne, even if he doesn't believe he deserves it. I will not let my feelings get in the way of doing what is right for Ferelden. I cannot. The Tower taught me too well."

"You still fell in love-"

"Don't." That one word was all it took for Wynne to close her mouth with a sigh. She had seen how close the Warden had come to breaking, and it was only thanks to the man now walking behind them that she'd retained her sanity.

"I will leave the subject alone for now, and trust you to do the right thing when the time comes."

"Thank you." Cassandra took a deep breath, trying to swallow the lump of anger and grief that was stuck in her throat. Suddenly, Lelianna gave a yell, and everyone focused their attentions up the road. The rogue rejoined the party as a group of six armored people made their way towards them. Three of them bore the symbol of regular Denerim soldiers, but three were in Templar armor. Lelianna had her hands resting on the two daggers at her waist, standing slightly in front of Wynne. Both mages gripped their staffs a little tighter, and Alistair now stood slightly in front of Cassandra. He also had his hand on his weapon.

"Well, well; nice day for a stroll, isn't it?" the leader asked, taking off his helmet and giving them a smirk. He was a Templar, but definitely not from the Circle Tower. Something was very wrong.

"Yes, and we'd like to get back to ours," she said, trying to keep her voice even.

"Oh, you would, would you? Damn apostate." She stiffened, but Wynne spoke:

"Young man, we have permission from not only First Enchanter Irving, but also Knight Commander Greagoir. We are certainly not apostates."

"No, but you are Grey Wardens."

"Oh lovely, more of Loghain's treachery," Alistair quipped. "But to be fair, only two of us are Wardens. Don't suppose you'll let these nice ladies go?"

"Not a chance," the Templar shot back, drawing his sword. "The Teryn has offered a substantial reward for you Wardens, and we intend to collect." A moment later, his group was diving for cover as a fireball detonated in their midst. Cassandra glared at them, flames wreathing her body in her anger.

"You'll get no easy blood money today!" she swore, the others joining in the fray. Lelianna kept herself between Wynne and the blades of the men she was fighting. Alistair took on the leader, leaving Cassandra to deal with one Templar and one regular soldier. She quickly surrounded her staff in flames as well, smirking at her opponents. "Sure you want to face a mage?" she asked. The soldier paused, and she drove the staff forward, catching him in the side and driving him to the ground. He grunted, but the Templar came at her, and she backpedaled to avoid a sword severing her arms. Her weapon free of her grip, the soldier got back up, but she could tell she'd broken a few of his ribs by the stiff way he moved. Chanting a quick spell, her staff started attacking the soldier by itself, and he screamed and began running away. The weapon followed, swiping at him every so often, and she couldn't help but laugh.

"I'll not be fooled by such cheap tricks!" the Templar warned her, his sword now wreathed in a soft light. She frowned, allowing most of her concentration to focus back to him. With only the need for minor attention on the staff, the Templar was the real threat.

"I'd be disappointed if you were," she told him, a bolt of lightning leaving her fingers as she snapped them forward. The energy enveloped him for a moment, and he cried out on pain, bringing his sword closer to his chest. A moment later, the spell dissipated, and he stood straighter. Even with his helmet on, she could feel the hateful glare he was giving her, and she tilted her head. This was something she'd never heard of before, much less seen. Could he actually have infused his sword with the power of a holy smite, to counter a spell? She took a step back, throwing a mind blast at him, but the sword swung down, and he was unaffected.

"Told you so, filthy apostate. You never should have left the Tower." She grit her teeth and called her favorite element: Fire. It shot from her hands, infusing the air around them with heat, and she directed all of it at the metal-clad man. He paused, feeling every part of him beginning to burn, and his armor felt almost liquid with the amount of power the mage was throwing at him. Stopping only a few feet from her, he brought the sword up in front of him, blocking out the pain as much as he good, and bowing his head. Too late, Cassandra realized he was chanting something: "Magic exists to serve man, and never to rule over him. Foul and corrupt are they who have taken His gift and turned it against His children."

"Alistair!" she called out, trying to get out of the way of whatever was going to come at her. If he took her magick, she would be defenseless.

"Blessed are the righteous, the lights in the shadow. In their blood the Maker's will is written!" Her spell was banished, and she felt the blade catch her arm, which she managed to get up in time to block her body. Though it was a shallow wound, it burned like someone had thrown acid on her, and she screamed. Her mana was drained from her, and she felt darkness eating at the edges of her vision as she went to her knees.

"Cassandra!" she heard his frantic call, but she could do nothing as the Templar came at her, sword raised to end it.

"Blessed are they who stand before the corrupt and the wicked and do not falter." She stared at him, refusing to look away from her death, until suddenly, she wasn't looking at him anymore. Another armored figure had barreled into him, throwing them both to the side. Alistair stood up first, moving in front of her.

"Blessed are the peacekeepers, the champions of the just," he said, his own sword glowing. "You will not harm her while I can still move," he vowed.

"Heretic!" the Templar screamed, getting back to his feet and taking a swing at the other Warden. Lelianna made her way over to Cassandra while the men fought, noting the bleeding slice on her arm as she took hold of it.

"Wynne's magick was also nullified by the Templars, so you will have to make do with bandages for now." However, the mage pulled away roughly, fear in her eyes.

"To the Void with my injuries, Lelianna! Help him!" The rogue shook her head, sighing slightly.

"I would not be much use to our companion against someone so heavily armored. Besides, do you not trust Alistair's skill?"

"That's not the point," she replied, hearing metal scrape against metal, trying not to look at what was happening. "With Wynne not able to heal, if he gets hurt… Maker help that Templar if he does anything to my Alistair." Lelianna's eyes widened for a moment, and she smiled softly, choosing not to say anything about her friend's choice of words. Alistair suddenly stumbled, his shield coming down to try and keep him balanced. The Templar saw an opportunity and struck, driving his sword through a gap in the Warden's armor. "**No**!" Cassandra screamed, even as Lelianna held her back. She watched as her companion fell, blood spurting from his shoulder. The Templar removed his helmet, a smirk plastered across his face.

"I shall let you witness their deaths, to show you who the Maker truly favors." He took a step towards the women, and anger seethed inside Cassandra. If only she had access to her magick, she'd show this bastard why he shouldn't have messed with them. But as he went to take another step, Alistair rolled over, grabbing onto his leg.

"I can still move," he said, slowly getting to his feet, throwing his own helmet off. "And I said you wouldn't touch her while I could."

"Then I shall have to rectify that situation!" The enemy turned, sword coming across Alistair's chest, and blood again sprayed into the air. "I shall make her watch you die first, then." Cassandra could stand it no longer, and grabbed one of Lelianna's daggers, taking off towards the fight, ignoring both her and Wynne's calls of protest. His eyes were not on her; he was too busy seeing Alistair gasping on the ground to notice. She gave as fierce a cry as she was able, driving the dagger forward, putting as much strength as she could muster behind it.

"Die!" The blade slid between a gap in his side, and he turned, surprised to see her there. He'd expected the rogue, not the powerless mage. She had done damage to him, that much he could feel. But it wasn't a deathblow. He backhanded her, and she lost her grip on the weapon, falling heavily to the ground.

"Warden, get up!" Wynne yelled at her.

"Time to die, mage," the Templar whispered, taking another swing. However, he stopped midway through, gurgling. A sword forced its way from his chest, and he slowly turned his head. Alistair was standing behind him, eyes as cold and dark as any demon he'd ever heard of. Cassandra watched silently as the light in the Templar's eyes died.

"Maker show you mercy," Alistair whispered. "You'll get none from me." He shook the corpse free of his blade, and smiled at her. "You all right?"

"Am I… Are **you** all right?" she demanded, getting to her feet and putting a hand on his arm. He shrugged, wincing as he moved his shoulder.

"I'd say the usual "never better" line, but you might just hit me to prove a point." He went to take a step, and his knees buckled. She eased him down to the ground, and saw that his face was pale, his breathing shallow. "So, remind me to send Loghain a bouquet of flowers for the **lovely** welcome he sent us."

"Wynne!" Cassandra called out, trying to choose whether she wanted to laugh or cry. "You idiot… Why did you do that?" He looked up at her, puzzled.

"Do what? Kill him? I thought that's what we did with bad guys? Did I miss a memo somewhere?" As the other women came running over, she decided that crying with a smile was definitely the only option she had. Otherwise, she probably would start hitting the smart-ass.

"Well young man, you certainly got yourself a few nasty scrapes," the older mage said, clucking her tongue like a worried mother. Cassandra helped Lelianna remove the top part of his armor, though her tears made the work a little difficult. Alistair sat there quietly, letting them work on his injuries. Wynne cleaned and bandaged him up, and then moved on to Cassandra's arm, which she had forgotten about. It stung, and hurt to move, but it wasn't as bad as the stab to his shoulder and slice across his chest. Hopefully Wynne regained her magick soon, so he didn't have to deal with the pain too long.

"I should really learn how to heal," she said softly.

"Well, unless you never intend to leave my side, it would be a good idea."

"Why Wynne, didn't you know? We thought we'd keep following you even after the Blight was over, just in case."

"Alistair, I doubt either of you would want to be my shadows at the Tower."

"You'd go back?" Cassandra asked, a little surprised. Her fellow mage shrugged, a mischievous smile on her face.

"They'd have to drag me back in irons after this little quest."

* * *

><p>They'd reached Eamon's Denerim estate after dark, and had been met at the door by their very worried friends. Even Sten and Shale had expressed concern at what had occurred on the road. Alistair was relaxing in his room, freshly healed, but still feeling sore. A knock sounded on the door, and he looked up. "Come in," he called. Cassandra opened the door, a smile on her face when she saw him. "Is everything all right, my Lady?"<p>

"Yes, now it is," she replied, sitting next to him. "I want to thank you for saving my life, Alistair."

"You would've done the same for me," he said with a dismissive wave. She was suddenly on top of him, forcing him down onto the bed. His eyes wide, he stared at the woman latched onto his torso, who was crying. "Cassandra! What's wrong? We're okay now, so why-"

"You could have died!" she shouted into his chest, her hands twisting his shirt. "And I can't… Alistair, I can't lose anyone else. Especially you." She looked up, and his expression was confusion mixed with hope.

"Why "especially me"? As long as one of us lives, Cassandra, the Blight will be-" She interrupted him by pressing her lips to his, wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him up to her. He was surprised for a moment, but his arms came up to circle her waist, hugging her to him. When they broke apart, he was blushing. "What was **that** for? Not that I'm complaining, but I want to know what I did to deserve that… So that I can do it again." She laughed in spite of herself, and he grinned back, wiping away her tears with a gentle hand. "I thought I was going to lose you today. And the thought of that… It terrified me. We've been through so much already, and it's always been us."

"We haven't been alone," she reminded him."

"I mean just us Grey Wardens. I know we've got quite an eclectic bunch with us, but… I'm not as close to them as I am to you."

"Alistair… Today, when you were fighting, I had so many emotions running through my mind. I was afraid for you, and angry at that Templar. And when you killed him, and I saw that you were okay, I just felt relief."

"Glad to know you care," he teased, resting his forehead against hers.

"That's just it," she said softly. "I'm not supposed to care. I've had people come and go in my life so often that I try not to form attachments to them. But you're different. With you, I feel safe, calm, and… Loved."

"I do love you, Cassandra," he told her, closing his eyes. "But I know you don't want to feel tied down-"

"Alistair." He opened his eyes, meeting hers, and she was blushing. "I love you too. I needed to be sure before I said the words. But you make me feel like… Like she did." The tears started again, and he kissed them away, holding her close.

"I'm glad you feel I'm as worthy as her, Cassandra." She grinned, shaking her head and pushing him onto his back again.

"Call me Cassie," she told him, running her hands up his chest. "Now then, what's say we put this nice, soft bed to good use, my love?" He blushed, but smiled back, his hands resting on her hips.

"Your wish is my command… Cassie."

* * *

><p><span>Chapter 4.5 <span>

Amaranthine was as busy as ever, and Cassandra watched the people walk along the streets as she sat on the wall outside the Chantry, waiting for Justice to finish talking with Kristoff's wife. The Spirit had insisted that he do that alone, and the others had respected his wishes. Nathaniel was occupied with adjusting his bow, and Anders had gone off somewhere to talk to an elf woman he'd recognized. She shook her head, feeling a slight twinge of jealousy begin, but she quickly squashed it. Just as she brought others to her bed, so she couldn't expect any different of a fellow mage. Suddenly, two things happened at once: Justice exited the Chantry, and Anders and his friend passed by on the walkway underneath her. "…You get caught, I'm not helping you any more, Anders."

"Namaya, I don't expect you to. Thank you for finding the cache."

"What you do with this information is none of my business," she said, walking away quickly. He seemed confused, and maybe a little bothered as well.

"Friend of yours?" she called down, a wicked grin on her face. He shook his head and came up to join the rest of them.

"I suppose that requires a little explanation?"

"Unless you want me to guess all the details, yes." He chuckled, shaking his head.

"It's not what you think. See, last time I escaped, I met Namaya. She helped me avoid a patrol looking for me, and we got to talking about how easy it is to track down mages when you have their phylactery." She nodded, her mind briefly wondering where Jowan was now. The last time she'd seen him had been at Redcliffe Castle… "So anyway, she looked into a few things, and found out something amazing."

"Amazing for us, or you?" Nathaniel quipped, rolling his eyes.

"You're just jealous because I'm in a good mood, stick-in-the-mud. Like I was saying, Namaya was following the trail of the Tower's phylacteries. When the Blight happened, they moved their repository out of Denerim, lest the darkspawn destroy it. But guess where they moved it to?" Cassandra's eyes lit up as she realized what he was saying, and she took his hand.

"They're here in Amaranthine?"

"Apparently. There's an old warehouse in the Market, and Namaya said it's not guarded very well so that they don't tip off anyone."

"Why are these phylacteries so important?" Justice wondered.

"Templars can use them to track down apostates, like me. But if they don't have our blood, they can't find us."

"And then you could practice your craft in peace?"

"Exactly!"

"Anders, listen to yourself," Nathaniel chastised. "If you destroy that warehouse, the Templars will come down even harder on the Circle. They'll demand something "better" from the apprentices; something infinitely worse than whatever it is that they take now. Do you want others to suffer while you go free?"

"You're being paranoid," the mage shot back. "Besides, I'm not going to smash **all** of them. Just mine."

"How selfish!" Justice added, glowering as best he could. "You have a chance to free some of your brethren. Take it!" Both mages stared at the Spirit, and Nathaniel's jaw hit the floor.

"Are you encouraging him?" the ex-noble asked.

"I am agreeing with him," Justice replied, fists clenching. "To imprison people simply because they can do magick is not just. Why do they not rise up and throw down their oppressors?"

"Because the Chantry controls the Circles," Cassandra told him. "If the mages revolted, it would be met with death." Justice stared at her, his dead eyes growing a bit darker. She had to admit: He was a bit frightening like that.

"So they are forced to comply with being prisoners? It is either that or death?"

"Oh no," Anders spoke up, the sarcasm thick in his voice. "You can also become Tranquil! Doesn't that sound exciting?" He looked bothered at the thought, but Justice clearly didn't understand.

"Tranquil are mages who have been cut off from the Fade," she said, voice softer than she wanted. "But in doing that, their personalities are also stripped from them. They become little better than walking dolls: Devoid of all emotion."

"There are many Tranquil in Kirkwall," Nathaniel added. "And all of them give me the creeps. I would rather fight darkspawn than deal with them."

"Why do mortals do this to each other?"

"Because they fear us," Anders replied, leaning over the wall, his fingers gripping the stones so hard they were turning white. "The Chant of Light says that magic should serve mankind, but the Chantry interprets that to mean that mages need to be locked up unless there's a specific need for their skills. Those of us that can heal are allowed out more often, but the Templars still watch us closely."

"How do you end up in the Circle?" the Spirit continued. "I cannot imagine that most people would volunteer for this."

"We don't. Most of us are only children when our powers manifest, and we can't control them. So we'll set things on fire, or move something with our mind, or even heal a family member without meaning to. But once the Templars are told about any strange occurrences, they come for you. And if your parents resist, they are killed, and you are taken anyway. Sometimes though, they want you to go, and it'll be your own family that turns you in." Anders' voice was low, but it had a dangerous quality to it. Cassandra had never seen him like this, and it worried her. She moved up behind him, placing a gentle hand on his back, and he turned slightly. His jaw was clenched so tight it looked painful, and his eyes were dark and haunted. Whatever he was remembering, it wasn't good.

"You're safe now," she reminded him, trailing a hand lightly down his face.

"I will never be safe so long as they have my phylactery," he whispered.

"Then we'll just go and get it," she vowed, putting a hand over his and squeezing gently. Anders nodded, taking a deep breath and standing up. As he did so, he pulled her into a hug, which she returned. Nathaniel made a noise of protest, but she ignored it.

"See, this is why I love you." Cassandra froze at those words, looking up into his eyes, but his usual teasing look was nowhere to be found.

"What?" she asked, the shock clear in her voice, her eyes wide.

"Hm? Oh, nothing. Forget I said it." He'd seen the fear on her face, and sighed as he let her go. Nathaniel pulled him back by the shoulder, scowling.

"Are all mages this touchy, or just you two?" he demanded.

"Care to find out?" Anders quipped, winking at the rogue, who pushed the mage roughly away. "What, do you only like women?"

"That's none of your business!"

"Fine, suit yourself. And here I thought we'd bond a little."

"Let's go find this warehouse. The sooner I get away from your constant teasing, the better," Nathaniel stated. Cassandra chuckled, and Anders pouted a bit, but then laughed. Justice seemed confused by them all, and starting walking to the Market District. The walk was relatively silent, except for Anders making random gestures at Nathaniel, who was doing his best to both ignore them and not blush.

"Commander," Justice said, moving up beside her. "I have a question."

"Just one this time? You're learning fast," she teased. When he sighed, she got serious again. "Sorry, I know humor isn't your strong point. What's the question?"

"What is love?" She stared at him, blinking for a moment. How in the world was she supposed to answer **that**?

"You're going to have to be more specific, Justice. Love has many forms in this world, and I know there are Spirits of Love in the Fade as well."

"Correct, but I have never personally met any. What I am referring to is this feeling that the body has whenever I think of Aura, Kristoff's wife. And while I was talking to her, she told me that it was her love for him that allowed her to see that I truly did not intend for this to happen. She was glad that I was here, instead of a demon taking over his corpse."

"Love between two people is one of the most beautiful things in our world. When you love someone, you would fight for them, die for them, and even kill to keep them safe. It is one the hardest emotions to truly feel, but you know when you do."

"Kristoff loved Aura. I can feel that much. Have you ever loved someone, Commander?" She smiled, looking up at the Spirit.

"I have loved different people, Justice, not just one person. But no matter if it is one or a hundred, I would give everything that I am if it meant they were safe and happy." He pondered her words for a moment, nodding.

"So, you and the other mage love each other?" She stopped walking, her breath catching in her throat.

"What makes you think that?" she asked softly, making sure Anders did not hear their conversation. He was too busy with Nathaniel to notice, thank the Maker.

"I do not know for certain, but it is a feeling I have. Am I wrong?" She opened her mouth to say "yes", but stopped. First Sigrun, and now Justice? And Anders' words to her before kept repeating over and over in her mind. She shook her head, resuming motion to try and think straight.

"I'm not so good at this love thing, Justice," she confessed. "Perhaps this is something you can ask Anders?"

"I shall do that then. Thank you, Commander." Soon they found the warehouse that Namaya had described, and it certainly didn't look guarded. Still, something seemed very off. Denerim was safe again, so why hadn't the phylacteries been taken back? And there seemed to be no guards or traps of any kind outside. What was waiting for them in there, though? She didn't want to walk into a whole squad of Templars. Maker's breath, she was going to have to resort to one of Morrigan's tricks.

"All of you, stay here," she commanded, ducking behind a row of barrels before they could question her. _'I am what I perceive.'_ She repeated the mantra, feeling the magick flow over her as the world shifted perspective. A moment later, a black cat sashayed out, flicking its tail at the men.

"Well, where did you come from, kitty?" Hands reached down to grab her, and Cassandra mentally cursed herself for forgetting about Anders' obsession with felines. Leaping out of the way, she took off towards the warehouse, the other mage thankfully held back by Justice. Getting up to the outside wall, she found a gap and squeezed through, thankful that this form was as lithe as it was. She took a look around, not hearing anything. No guards, no traps that she could see, and…. Well, not much of anything. There were chests aplenty lining the walls though, and the phylacteries could be inside them. Still, everything about this made the fur on her neck stand on end. She shook her head, a growl escaping her mouth. They just needed to get in, find the right phylactery, smash it, and leave. Cassandra looked around one last time, and stood up in her natural form when she was sure no one else was in the building. Getting to the door, she unlocked it and waved at her group. They seemed puzzled, but came over, and she shut the door behind them.

"Search the chests. There aren't any guards here, but we don't know how long that will last." Anders didn't need to be told twice, and he began freezing some of the locks while Nathaniel used his tools on some others. However, every chest they opened seemed only full of random objects, not mages' phylacteries. The feeling of impending trouble settled on her again, and she slammed shut a chest, getting their attention. "This isn't right. We need to go. Now."

"But-"

"Anders, something is wrong, and I think this is-" The door burst open, and a squad of six Templars ran in, weapons out.

"Andraste's blood!" Nathaniel swore, his bow drawn faster than she could get to her feet. Justice had his sword out, shield up to defend her, since she was next to him.

"I knew we'd catch you if the bait was sweet enough, Anders," the lead Templar said, removing her helmet to reveal Captain Rylock. "You'll be coming with us."

"Hang on a moment!" he shot back. "I'm a Grey Warden now. The King allowed my conscription."

"Chantry Law overrides any sort of royal approval, or even this "Right of Conscription" the Wardens have."

"Captain Rylock," she said, eyes narrowing. "Anders is one of my subordinates now, and you will relinquish your claim on him."

"Afraid I can't do that, Commander. Besides, he'll never bow to anyone, be it Templar, Circle, or Wardens."

"Be that as it may, you are not taking him without a fight."

"Commander-" She shot Anders a glare, and he closed his mouth.

"Did you want to go with them?" He shook his head, and his fists clenched as she saw the darkness cross through his eyes. "Then you have my stance on this matter. Walk away, and no one will get hurt. Press the issue, Captain, and there will be blood."

"So long as justice is done, I can handle blood." The Spirit next to her narrowed his eyes, and she felt his anger at Rylock for using the concept he stood for to rationalize what she was doing.

"You will know true justice soon, oppressor." The Templars charged, and she launched a fireball at the wall as Justice clashed swords with their attackers. The thin wood gave way to the explosion, blowing a sizeable hole in the warehouse.

"Anders, run!" she told him. He stared at her, wanting to argue. "We'll catch up, but it's you they want. Head for the Keep!" Nodding, he took off down the street, and she sent some chain lightning at the two warriors who were stupid enough to try and follow.

"Was that wise, Commander?" Nathaniel asked, another arrow finding its target.

"Ask me after this is over," she shot back, blasting another Templar with force magick. Suddenly, she felt a wave of energy wash over her, and turned to see two Templars she hadn't noticed before. They appeared to have come from the other side of the warehouse, and both were glowing with holy light. Her mana reserve was stripped, and her sense of balance was momentarily lost. She went to her knees, keeping a firm grip on her staff in case any of them got closer. "Nathaniel, Justice, my magick is gone!"

"Then get out of here," the Spirit replied, severing one of his opponent's arms. "Find Anders on the road, and we'll join you shortly." She got to her feet, still a bit unsteady. Everything she was told her to stay, but her practical side knew she would be of no help in this fight. Stumbling past the melee, she started to run, trying to get her legs to work properly.

"Commander!" Nathaniel's shout refocused her attention, and she saw that one of the Templars had a bow, with an arrow aimed at her! There was no way she'd get out of the way in time, and she had no magick to defend herself. As the arrow headed for her, she found herself wishing that Alistair was there.

"Cassandra!" She heard the voice, and a moment later, something hit into her side, dropping her hard to the ground. Her head smacked onto the cobblestone street, and all she saw were stars. Trying to get up, she felt something on top of her, and heard frantic yells, but couldn't make them out. After a minute of fighting the pain and dizziness, she let blessed unconsciousness take her.

* * *

><p>"Stop struggling, you idiot!" Nathaniel's voice pulled her back to reality, but her head still felt heavy, her body unresponsive. What was going on? She wasn't moving, so who in the world was the rogue talking to? "Justice, try and keep him still."<p>

"I am trying, but all he keeps asking is if the Commander is all right."

"She's fine." Grudgingly, she became aware that she was being carried, her head against someone's chest. Her holder rocked forward for a moment, and then back, trying to balance her weight. Stairs. They were going up stairs. Where were they? "Put him on the bed. I'll put her next to him, and then we'll work on that wound." Who was wounded? Andraste's flaming panties, this was frustrating! She couldn't really open her eyes still, and she could tell that her magick hadn't come back yet. Was it just after the fight? Were they still in Amaranthine? She felt something solid beneath her, and the arms that had been supporting her retracted, and she lay there, willing herself to focus. The warehouse: She remembered the Templars charging in, the conversation with Rylock, and then the ensuing fight. Anders had run, and hopefully he was safe on the road, even by himself. Then there was the arrow coming at her, and then… Someone had knocked her down, and after that she didn't know. Groaning a bit, she brought her hand to her head, wincing as her own touch brought a shooting pain to her temples.

"Cassandra!" She felt something on the bed shift, and a hand closed around her wrist. Was that… Anders' voice?

"Don't move!" Nathaniel sounded upset by something, and she tried to shift her body to face where his voice was coming from. As she did, she heard a gasp, and then a **snap**, followed by the rogue swearing again. "You bloody idiot! Do you know what you just did to yourself?"

"I don't care!" Oh, that was definitely Anders, and he sounded very upset about something. Finally, her eyelids obeyed her commands to open, and she saw light-brown eyes focusing on her, and then a small smile was on his face. "Good morning, sunshine."

"Commander?" Justice asked, and she turned her focus higher, seeing the Spirit leaning over the two of them.

"Someone had better tell me what's going on right now," she ordered. She sat up slowly, pressing a hand to her forehead as the room swam for a moment.

"You were knocked out during the battle. Nathaniel and I managed to hold our own until some of the City Guard arrived. They took the remaining Templars into custody, and we took you and Anders to the Crown and Lion; to Kristoff's room."

"Why? Shouldn't we be headed for the Keep? Or even to the barracks to question the Templars?"

"I came here so we could tend to both your injuries," Nathaniel said with a sigh. "But it seems our little healer is a poor patient." She looked over, her vision back to normal, but she suddenly wished it wasn't. Anders was lying beside her, his face pale, even as he kept a death grip on her arm. Her gaze traveled down his body, and that's when she saw it clearly: What remained of an arrow shaft was sticking out of his left side, blood staining his reinforced coat. Her fingers gently probed the surface of the wound, staring at the broken arrow.

"What happened to the rest of it?"

"It snapped off in my hand when he moved to reach you." Anders had a sheepish grin on his face, but he didn't seem to be in much pain.

"Oops," he said softly, taking a deep breath. "I can't feel where it is though, and I keep telling him that."

"And I think you're insane! How can you not feel this?" Nathaniel tilted the shaft up, but the other mage didn't even flinch.

"Because I can't? I don't know what to tell you, Nathaniel. Maybe I have a high pain threshold?"

"Doubtful," Justice quipped, a hand on his shoulder. "But you cannot use magick either, my friend, so how do we heal you?"

"Wait, they used a smite attack on you too?" Cassandra asked, trying to stop her mind from panicking.

"Happened when I got hit. Magebane probably. Maybe it numbs you too. Never been hit with it before, so I don't know." Anders stated, rather matter-of-factly. She took his hand, smoothing his hair away from his face. Some of it had come loose during the chaos, and she pushed the dirty-blonde strands back into place.

"Anders, we need to get that arrow out of you, okay?"

"I won't argue." He sounded tired, but if he went to sleep… She squeezed his hand, and he looked up, confusion in his eyes. "What?"

"No sleeping, or I'll let Nathaniel stab you to keep you up." He nodded, and his face took on a more focused look. "That's better."

"Commander, how are we going to do this? He broke almost half the shaft off. I won't be able to push it out easily."

"It didn't go all the way through?" Fear seized her for a moment, but she took a deep breath to calm her racing heart.

"It went deep, but not enough. And if he can't feel it, how can we tell where it is so we don't hurt him more?" Nathaniel also sounded worried, and she shrugged.

"Well, sitting here talking about it won't fix him, so we need to try something. Maybe I can… I have smaller hands, so maybe if I feel around the wound, I'll be able to tell where the point is facing."

"You mean feel around** in** the wound," Anders shot back. "I hate being a healer at times like this."

"Do we have a choice?" Justice spoke up. The other Wardens all shook their heads, and the Spirit nodded. "Then let the Commander work." She sucked in a quick breath, and Nathaniel helped her peel back his coat, showing the blood-soaked shirt beneath, which she further sliced with a dagger the rogue had on him. Now she could clearly see the entry point, and aside from being bloody, it looked like clean shot. Thank the Maker that most Templars considered standard arrows to be the most "humane" when trying to kill someone. Her fingers slipped into the wound, and Anders grimaced, hands twining in the sheets.

"Justice, don't let him move." The Spirit nodded, placing both hands on the mages' shoulders, pinning him down. "And you, stop watching. Even if you can't feel the pain, I'm sure this doesn't look pleasant."

"And miss the fun of my first arrow removal? Perish the thought."

"First? You've never been shot before?" Nathaniel asked, one eyebrow raised. Cassandra smiled to herself, hoping the conversation would distract Anders long enough for her to remove the arrow.

"Unless you haven't noticed, mages tend to stay far away from combat. We're not exactly the world's best when it comes to feats of fortitude… That, and we bruise easy." She had two fingers in the wound, following the shaft down until she came to the point. It didn't seem to be stuck on anything, but just in case, it wouldn't hurt to force the edges in so it could be pulled out. For that, she was going to need help. Making yet another hole in him wasn't something she wanted to do, but this wasn't going to feel pleasant regardless.

"Anders?" He looked up, and she saw fear and pain written on his features. Why he wasn't screaming was anyone's guess.

"What's wrong?" She smiled, taking her free hand and rubbing his arm gently.

"I'm going to try something, and it might hurt. Do you trust me?" He blinked, a smile spreading across his whole face.

"Of course I do," he replied.

"Good. Justice, I need to borrow your ring."

"The lyrium ring you found in Kal'Hirol?"

"That one, yes. Since it's made of lyrium, I can use it to jumpstart my magick so that I can help Anders." The Spirit seemed puzzled, but removed one of his gauntlets and extended his hand to her. The ring shone brightly on his finger, glowing with its own power, and she felt her body literally pulse with the stone's glow. She reached out with her free hand, lightly touching the surface of the worked stone. Instantly she felt a surge of mana, and the stone's glow dimmed for just a moment as Justice pulled back. Closing her eyes, she rested her fingers on the point of the arrow, hoping she could control the spell enough for it to do what she needed. She felt the metal constrict slowly, and she kept her focus on what she ultimately needed it to become. Anders stiffened when he felt the magick inside his body, but Justice kept his shoulders pinned, and Nathaniel held on to his legs. "I'm sorry," she whispered, not daring to look at him.

"I'm all r-right, I just- Maker's breath!" He jerked his head back, clenching his jaw against the pain that suddenly ripped through him.

"What's happening?" Justice asked, concern in his voice.

"I'd say the poison is beginning to wear off. Or at least, the numbing affect," Nathaniel guessed, switching his grip on the mage's legs. Cassandra took a deep breath, willing herself to finish the spell and not lose focus. Finally, she ran her fingers around the now edgeless ball, and she gently eased them out of the wound. Blood dripped down her hand, and she stared at it, feeling an old terror rise in the back of her mind.

"Bandages. Now," she manages to choke out, eyes wide.

"My pack," Anders said through clenched teeth, as the rogue released him and grabbed the backpack. Instantly, there was a yowl, a surprised shout, and then a ball of fur was in Cassandra' lap, hissing.

"What in Andraste's name is that animal doing here?"

"Coming along for the ride?" Pounce's arrival was enough to snap her back to reality, and she grabbed the cat, bringing him up to face her.

"Ssh, it's all right," she crooned, trying not to get Anders' blood all over him. After a moment, he settled down, leaping off the bed and curling up next to the fireplace. "Nathaniel, please get the bandages." Anders was holding his hand over the wound, fingers around the arrow. His eyes were closed, and his face was scrunched up in obvious pain. She shifted positions, lifting his head into her lap, and he opened his eyes. Justice stood up, watching them with a curious look. Nathaniel handed her a clean cloth, and she wiped her hand off, pressing it to Anders' forehead afterwards. "We need to pull that arrow out now," she told him.

"Ready," he softly replied. She nodded at the rogue, wrapping an arm around her fellow mage's shoulders.

"Justice, once the arrow is free, put pressure on the wound." The Spirit took the bandages with a nod. Without further warning, Nathaniel grasped the shaft and pulled. With a wet, sucking pop, it slid out of the mage's body, and he gasped, eyes wide. Cassandra held him to her, and Justice immediately staunched the flow of fresh blood. Using what little healing magick she knew, the Warden Commander put her hand on Anders' torso, willing the bleeding to stop and the worst of the damage to mend. All was silent in the room for a few minutes except for the healer's labored breathing. Justice carefully peeled back the pressure bandage, taking stock of the wound. There still was one, but now it did not seem as deep, and Nathaniel leaned over to examine it as well.

"How is it?" Anders whispered, trying to sit up. Cassandra braced him against her, and his fingers traced the edges of the wound, practiced eyes telling him what still needed to be done with it. "Okay, it's not too bad. Blasted Templar poison taking my magick… Blight take them all," he grumbled. Standing up, the rogue allowed a rare smile to grace his features, breathing a sigh of relief.

"Well Commander, I think that was about all the excitement this Warden could handle for today. I'll go down to the common room and see about meals for all of us, and another room for Justice and myself." She nodded, beginning to wind the bandages around Anders, who was still leaning against her.

"Take Justice with you. And watch for Templars." He bowed, and the Spirit dipped his head in acknowledgement.

"We will return shortly with food," Justice promised as they left the room, closing the door behind them. Once the other mage was bandaged, she pulled him up to her, kissing him so suddenly that he just sat there in shock.

"What was that for?" he asked when she pulled back. "I mean, that was an amazing "thank you" kiss, but-"

"You idiot!" she nearly shouted, fists clenching in his shirt. "What were you thinking? I told you to run!"

"I did!" he argued. "I got most of the way down the street before Ser-Pounce-a-Lot started yowling, and then I got to thinking: You were trying to protect me, but who was protecting you? No offense Cassandra, but you're not a great healer. Wonderful with offense, but that didn't do much good once the holy smiting started."

"I healed you well enough," she shot back. His hand pressed against the bandages, and he nodded.

"I won't die from blood loss, at least. And once my magick comes back, I'll be good as new." He smiled, lightly caressing her cheek. "But what's really bothering you? Come on, you can tell me. It can't just be that Templars tried to kill us. That's certainly nothing new for us mages."

"You got hurt protecting me. For the Maker's sake Anders, why?" He looked confused, and she couldn't quite get her thoughts to come out coherent.

"Okay, either you don't understand how important you are to the Wardens, or you don't understand how important you are to **me**." She froze, staring at him, hoping that he did not mean what she thought he did.

"Tell me you didn't," she practically begged, shaking her head. "It's the unwritten rule of the Circle, Anders. Tell me you didn't break it."

"I've already broken it once before," he answered, voice soft. "Besides, you did too." She swallowed, looking away, but he turned her face back to him. "Who was it?"

"Who was what?"

"Your first love. He must have been very special." She grinned in spite of herself, leaning him back against the headboard so she could see him better.

"She was." His eyebrow went up, and his jaw dropped for a moment. "Oh, did you think I only like men?"

"Well, maybe only handsome, strapping fellows like myself and the King."

"She would have liked you. Both of you. Deborah had a thing for humor, and she was very patient in dealing with smart-mouths." His eyes took on a thoughtful look, like he was trying to remember something. "What is it?"

"That name sounds familiar. I know you were a year ahead of me in studies, but was she in your class?"

"No, she would've been in yours." He snapped his fingers, and Pounce lifted his head to stare at them, stretching and walking back over to the bed.

"Of course! We took Herbalism together. She was a little thing, with the greenest eyes I've ever seen: Like looking into an endless forest." Cassandra nodded, wondering how her lover had attracted his attention. "She was a wonderful healer, the best in our class. Even I had trouble focusing on different injuries at once, but not Deborah Gueriss." Her full name. Now there was no doubt that Anders had indeed known her. Half-Orlesian from her father, hence the odd last name, but that had never mattered to Cassandra. What mattered was that Deborah was a gentle person who never raised her voice in anger, always put others first, and always believed that Cassandra would be there for her… The tears slipped out before she could stop them, and she found herself pulled into his embrace, Pounce curling around her and purring. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to-"

"It's all right," she said, her throat feeling tight. "Deborah was a wonderful healer because she couldn't be anything else. Every time she tried to cast an offensive spell, it backfired, or just fizzled. But she could bring people back from death's door, and I was the one who could put them there. We made a good team."

"You miss her?"

"Every day. It took a while for me to come to terms with what happened at the Tower." She pulled back, eyes cast down, and Anders didn't press the subject. Instead, he trailed a hand down her cheek, leaning in to kiss her tears away. "So, what about you?"

"What about me?" She turned her eyes back to him, raising an eyebrow.

"Your love. What was she like?" He chuckled, shaking his head.

"My dear, you presume quite a bit. His name is Karl." Cassandra stared at him for a moment, not quite sure he was telling the truth.

"Karl? You mean you-"

"What? You can sleep with other girls, but it's weird that I slept with other men?"

"No, of course not. I just… I guess I shouldn't be surprised, what with you teasing Nathaniel and Captain Garevel all the time." He waved his hand dismissively.

"Oh, that's harmless fun. Neither of them are interested in me. Besides, I've been oddly chaste since becoming a Warden. Is that a side effect I should have known about?"

"Not that I know of," she replied with a shrug. "But I've been the same since coming to Vigil's Keep." Anders smirked, taking her hand and kissing it.

"Must be my foreign charm. Or my obsession with small, fuzzy creatures." She laughed as Pounce rubbed his head against Anders' side, but the other mage winced and picked up the cat, moving him across the bed. "You did that on purpose," he scolded, tapping Pounce's nose. He held his side for a moment, and she stopped laughing, placing her hand over his. "I'm all right. I just wasn't expecting him to press so hard."

"Anders?" He glanced up, seeing the serious look on her face. "What does this all mean? I didn't come here expecting to find love…"

"Neither did I," he admitted. "But since I've been able to check off two of my three "things I want to do before I die" list, I'm not complaining." She tilted her head, a puzzled expression crossing her features. "All I wanted when I was in the Tower was a decent meal, a pretty girl, and the right to shoot lightning at fools. Though that would require me to actually **learn** how to control lightning, but I'm doing okay so far." Cassandra giggled, leaning against him and closing her eyes. "See, being a Warden isn't always such serious business."

"Not when you're around."

"Is that a good thing?" She nodded, and his arms wrapped around her. "I'm glad you conscripted me, Cassandra." She looked up, smiling softly.

"Cassie." He stared at her, confusion in his eyes, and her smile widened.

"You'd let me call you that?"

"Deborah was the only one I ever let call me that, and it became a sign between us of how deep our bond was. Alistair earned the right to use that name, and now you have too." She kissed him, and Pounce jumped off the bed as the door opened, but she ignored it. Anders broke the kiss long enough to glare at Justice, who was staring at them.

"A little privacy please!" The Spirit shrugged and walked back into the hall, turning to face Nathaniel, who was shaking his head.

"You were correct. It seems the Commander and Anders are together."

"Justice, a blind man could've seen that. Now let's leave the mages alone for now." The rogue headed for the room he'd rented, leaving Justice to stand in the hall for a moment; casting one more look at the closed door before following the other Warden.

* * *

><p>The night was relatively peaceful as Captain Rylock made her way out of the Chantry. Well, former Captain, anyway. At least she'd been allowed to remain with the Order. Mother Leanna had been furious at not only the blatant disregard for the populace's safety, but also her picking a fight with the Commander of the Grey herself. "Damn those Wardens. I'll not allow them to harbor that fugitive!" she said to no one. A shadow suddenly detached itself from a nearby building, and she stopped, hand on her sword. "Halt, identify yourself."<p>

"Really Captain, do we need introductions at this late stage?" The person threw the hood back from the black cloak they wore, and stepped close to the light. Sure enough, it was the Warden Commander. "I see the Chantry let you out of prison?"

"Not without repercussions," she replied bitterly. Cassandra's eyes narrowed, and she leaned on her staff for a moment.

"You brought the consequences on yourself, Templar. Maybe next time you'll heed my warning."

"So Anders lives then?" The mage nodded, her eyes shifting around them: They were indeed alone.

"Yes, he lives. Tell me Rylock, do you really fear him that much?"

"He is an apostate who killed two of my men!"

"You have no proof of that. There were darkspawn everywhere, and they could have easily killed those two. Your abilities do nothing to stop their common soldiers."

"And you are too trustworthy! Anders will turn on you one day, Commander." The venom in her voice was strong, and Cassandra raised any eyebrow, a smirk slowly curling her lips.

"I very much doubt that. One final question, and I shall be on my way. You are obviously afraid of mages, but I'm curious: Which of us scares you more?" Rylock seemed confused by the question, and took a moment to answer.

"He does. You are more Grey Warden than mage, and you are the Commander and Arl of Amaranthine. You wouldn't do something to damage your reputation. Anders is unpredictable, and therefore more dangerous." A moment later, she felt like the air was being squeezed from her lungs, and she gasped, trying to move. But something held her in place, even as flames outlined Cassandra's form. The Warden Commander walked closer to her, her eyes dark and a wicked grin on her face.

"I do not give a damn about my reputation, Templar. I may be a Warden, but I am a mage first and foremost. You seem to have forgotten this. You tried to take one of my companions from me, even after you had no legal recourse to do so. Then when we fought back, you tried to kill us. You and your Templars tried to **kill** Grey Wardens; your rulers. That is treason, Rylock, and there is only one suitable punishment for traitors."

"Mercy," the woman choked out, feeling her ribs breaking under the spell. Cassandra stared at the insignia on the armor she wore, and the flames around her intensified, lighting up the whole area.

"Mercy? Like your people show mine? Mercy?" She turned, balling her hand into a fist. Rylock tried to scream, but she had no air left to do so. Bones crunched and metal gave way under the power of force magick. When the Templar lay dead at her feet, the flames subsided, and Cassandra glanced back at the body. She took a deep breath, shaking her head. "I will never show mercy to Templars. You don't deserve it."

"Justice was done tonight."

"That wasn't Justice," she told the Spirit as he walked up to her. "That was revenge, pure and simple."

"Are they not the same?" She stared at him, frowning.

"Justice is a noble idea, done for the greater good of all people. Vengeance is usually an evil act done for selfish reasons."

"You are not evil, Commander."

"But I am selfish. I wasn't about to leave her to come after Anders again."

"You told me earlier that if you love someone, you would be willing to kill to keep them safe. Do you admit that you love him now?"

"It's a good excuse, anyway," she replied with a shrug and a small grin. They returned to the Inn, and she crawled into bed next to the still-sleeping Anders. Pounce was beside him, curled into a little ball, and she stroked the cat's back. The other mage stirred, blinking for a moment as he focused on her.

"Everything all right?"

"Everything's fine," she told him, giving him a quick kiss. "I was just checking up on the Templars we fought."

"Oh, how are the iron-clad morons?"

"They won't be bothering us again, that's for sure." He nodded, pulling her as close as he could while trying not to crush the cat.

"Goodnight Cassie." They both smiled and settled down again.

"Goodnight Anders."


	5. Saying Goodbye

Chapter 5: Saying Goodbye

It had been a little over two weeks after the Blight had been stopped. After the celebrations, life was starting to return to normal. The Dwarves and the Dalish returned to their own lands, leaving the humans and city elves to clean up. Denerim was being rebuilt, farmers returned to their lands, and the population was generally settling down. Even the Circle Tower was being reconstructed, and a peace was being worked on to allow less Templar involvement, per the Hero's request. Cassandra stood on the balcony in her room, watching the royal palace come to life for another day, and glanced over at the bed. Alistair was sleeping peacefully, a small smile on his face. The sheets were twisted about him, and his arm was flung across where she had been laying only a short time ago. She sighed happily, until her gaze came to rest on a letter on the table. It bore the official seal of the Grey Wardens, and reading it had soured her mood considerably. "Not enough that we stopped the archdemon," she mumbled to herself. "Now they want to try their hands at politics again. No good can come of this."

"Don't say that," Alistair said sleepily, one eye open and watching her. "Especially because it's going to be **you** that will be taking charge of Amaranthine." She sat next to him on the edge of the bed, stroking his hair.

"If this hadn't come from the Wardens, I'd be accusing Anora of wanting you all to herself." He grinned, and then shrugged as he sat up, pulling her against him.

"She has her kingdom, like she always wanted. The fact that I'm a required part of that just makes things more interesting."

"I don't know the first thing about being a noble," she admitted.

"I thought your family was nobility?" She chuckled, shaking her head.

"Alistair, I'm a mage. I was brought to the Tower when I was eight, along with my older brother. When Richard was born, they kept a close eye on him, and he joined us when he was only five. Neither of us really even remember our parents, let alone that they were nobles."

"Oh, well… I'm sure you'll do just fine. Can't be much worse than traipsing about with our ragtag group, right?" They smiled, but Cassandra couldn't help but think about one of their companions in particular.

"Alistair," she said softly, not quite sure how to bring this up. "About Morrigan…" He rolled his eyes and flopped back on the bed, one hand over his face.

"What about her?"

"I'm sorry I made you-" He was sitting up faster than she could blink, one finger on her lips and a small smile on his face. Even his eyes were shining with warmth.

"You didn't "make me" do anything. I slept with her to save your life. The fact that I'll soon have a child running around without knowledge of me does sting a little, considering my history. But we both agreed that she was free to go after the… Ritual. And I don't regret it for a single moment. When you drove that blade into the archdemon's head, I thought for sure I was going to lose you. But when I saw you standing over its body, perfectly whole and alive… It made me forgive almost everything Morrigan had ever said to me."

"Almost everything?" He raised an eyebrow.

"She was a bit of a bitch, Cassie. Even you have to admit that."

"She was raised to be tough; tougher than us at the Circle. But make no mistake; Morrigan cared about what could've happened to us. I am glad to call her my friend."

"You are a very strange woman, Cassandra Amell." She gently pulled away from him, smiling as she stood up.

"I wouldn't be me if I weren't." He stood up as well, hunting around for a pair of pants. They were somewhere on the floor, he was sure of it.

"So… When does the First Warden want you at the Keep?"

"In a little over a week's time," she said, looking over the letter again. "Which means I need to leave today if I'm to get to the Tower and then Amaranthine."

"Why are you going to the Tower?"

"I promised Arl Eamon I would escort Connor there and introduce him to First Enchanter Irving. And since he's my brother's age, I can have him meet some of his fellow apprentices. Beats having the Templars haul you in and throw you into the living quarters with everyone just staring." Alistair grimaced for a moment.

"Yikes. I can see how that could be a bit awkward. But at least Connor will have a friendly face, and this will go a long way to proving that mages don't need to be watched." Cassandra turned away for a moment, her eyes darkening slightly.

"I still wish we could just abolish the bloody Tower. We don't need to be locked up. And I know that what Uldred did is still fresh in everyone's mind, but… Damnit, we're people too!" She was suddenly pulled into an embrace, his arms wrapped tightly around her. "Templars on one side and blood mages on the other. Neither are good choices as far as I'm concerned."

"Then prove how great mages can be as rulers. Be the best Arl you can be, Cassie. I know you'll have the other Wardens falling all over themselves to get on your good side, and you'll be able to make them see what a wonderful person you are."

"You are biased, you know," she teased.

"I only speak the truth, my Lady." He tilted her chin up, face serious as he sighed. "I'm going to miss you, though. It'll be odd not having you around after a year of seeing you every day." She nodded, leaning in to kiss him. When they broke apart, she grinned.

"I'll be back before you know it. I don't really want to take Duncan's place as Commander of the Grey. Not permanently, anyway. Just make sure you don't go falling in love with Anora and not want to see me again."

"Now that is one thing you never have to worry about. She might be my Queen and my… Wife, but we don't love each other. And if there wasn't pressure to produce an heir… Well, I'm sure she'd never come within ten feet of me if she didn't have to."

"You'll make a wonderful king. I believe in you."

"I'm glad one of us does." Cassandra sighed and looked out over the balcony again, seeing the sun rising higher.

"Help me pack my things?" He nodded, kissing her hand.

"I just might pack myself in there as well. I love you, Cassie"

"I love you too, Alistair. Come on, the sooner I leave, the sooner I can return."

It would be a little over a year until Cassandra returned to Denerim, her duties at Vigil's Keep over with. As promised, Alistair was waiting for her.

Chapter 5.5 

With both the Mother and the Architect dead, peace was returning to Amaranthine. The city was destroyed, but the people who remained vowed to rebuild. Vigil's Keep had survived the darkspawn onslaught, though the death of Seneschal Varel was greatly mourned. With word sent to Weisshaupt about what had happened, the First Warden declared the Fifth Blight officially over. And Cassandra Amell's request to step down as Warden Commander was accepted, though she would still retain the Commander "rank" among the Wardens if she ever had need for it. She was lying outside the Keep again, watching the clouds drift by, when she heard footsteps. Looking up, she saw Anders and Pounce heading for her, and sat up. However, he had a rather serious look on his face, and she instantly got a bad feeling. "What's wrong?"

"I got a letter from Karl." He sat beside her, resting his head in his hands for a moment. When she placed a hand on his shoulder, he looked up. "He's being moved… To Kirkwall." Panic shot through her for a moment, and a gasp escaped her lips.

"Anders… I'm so sorry. What are you going to do?"

"I'm going to go get him." She stared, tilting her head slightly, like she hadn't heard him correctly.

"Go get him? Anders, are you telling me you intend to kidnap Karl from the Circle? Force him to be an apostate?"

"It's better than being there!" he shot back, anger clear in his voice. He'd become more and more bothered by the Circle and Chantry in the weeks following Rylock's attack. From conversations she'd managed to overhear between him and Justice, Anders was even considering trying to fight against mage oppression, like the Spirit had suggested. Cassandra nodded, and he took her hand, bringing it to his lips. "I'm sorry, Cassie. I'm not mad at you. I just… Maker's breath, Kirkwall, of all places."

"Do you want help?" Anders shook his head, stroking Pounce's head to calm himself. The cat purred and rubbed against his master.

"No, I don't want to get you involved with this. Not after what happened with Amaranthine. I know the First Warden wasn't happy about your decision to raze the city… Even I wasn't pleased with it."

"But you know why I did it." He nodded, squeezing her hand.

"I don't envy that decision you were forced to make, my love. And the people are rebuilding, so maybe it was a blessing in disguise. But two Warden mages showing up in the City of Chains will be too much for the Knight Commander. If anyone is going to fall, it's going to be me."

"Don't say such things!" she chastised him, grabbing his coat and pulling him to her. Anders let her hold him, closing his eyes and breathing in her scent. She smelled like lavender and fresh grass, mostly due to her being outside a lot.

"I'll be fine, I promise. Once I have Karl, we'll get out of the Free Marches."

"And go where?" He shrugged, pulling back to meet her gaze.

"I… I don't know. Where does a Warden and his apostate lover run to?"

"To his other lover," she replied with a small smile. "Come to Denerim. Alistair and I will shelter you." He raised an eyebrow, smirking a bit.

"So I'm going to be the consort of the consort of the King?" Cassandra lightly smacked his arm, and he chuckled. "I couldn't ask you to-"

"You're not asking, Anders. I'm telling you. Both of you will be protected with us. No one will come hunting you, and even if they do… Maybe I'll just tell them I conscripted Karl too."

"Why not? Worked well enough with me… That idiot Rylock not included." His eyes darkened, and his fists clenched for a moment. "Still wish I'd been able to do something about her. Bloody darkspawn took her out, though." Cassandra hadn't told anyone about her involvement in the Templar's death, and Justice had kept his mouth shut as well. When the official death notices came from Amaranthine, it was listed that she had died during the siege, and given all accordant honors with trying to protect the city. The mage was not going to ever set the record straight, either.

"Then it's settled. But I still wish you'd bring someone else as backup. Even Sigrun or Nathaniel would be willing to go, I'm sure." He looked nervous for a moment, but then smiled.

"Actually, Justice is coming with me."

"Wait, I thought he was going to give Kristoff's body back to Aura?"

"It'll be one last adventure." He stood and offered her a hand, which she accepted. Anders embraced her, nuzzling her neck for a moment. "Swear to me that you'll be there." She was momentarily surprised at his words.

"I swear I will wait for you. Just stay safe. Don't make me march to Kirkwall with the whole of Weisshaupt behind me." He laughed, picturing the scene.

"I promise. I'll get Karl out, and we'll be on the first ship back to Ferelden. And then we'll be one big, happy…" He paused, but she cupped his chin in her hand and smiled, eyes lighting up.

"Family," she finished. "We'll be a family, like normal people."

"I don't think there will be anything normal about that situation." They both laughed, and she kissed him, pulling him tight against her. When they broke apart, he was blushing. "I love you, Cassie. I'll be back before you know it."

"I love you too, Anders."

It would be almost ten years before Cassandra saw him again. Word drifted to Ferelden about unrest in Kirkwall, and she knew she needed to find Anders and bring him home.


	6. Recruitment

Chapter 6: Recruitment

Tevinter was a rather lovely place, if you could look past all the slavery, blood magick, and icons of the old gods still everywhere. "I will be glad to leave this place once we're done here," Alistair said, rubbing his arms as they walked past a group of slaves bound for the market. Cassandra didn't even blink as she kept walking, her arms full of books. "Are you sure you don't want help with that?"

"I'm fine," she replied curtly, her gaze still directly ahead. Alistair frowned and sighed. She was in one of her pensive moods again, which wasn't good. "Sweetheart-"

"I can carry my own research," she shot back, finally looking up at him.

"I know you can, but… I just want to help. I feel so useless here. Not to mention creeped out by all the weird stuff."

"We'll be out of here soon, I promise. This is the last of my preparations, and then we'll be all set. I'm sure the others are eager to leave as well."

"Considering how Zevran and Isabella haven't left the ship since we got here, I'd say so. Even Shale is starting to get frustrated by being back."

"But she makes a good bodyguard for the boys." They arrived back at their rented home, and were greeted by a rather playful Mabari, who nearly knocked the mage over. "Dane, get down! How many times have I told you: If you want to jump on someone, jump on Alistair. He enjoys it."

"Hey-" A moment later, the King of Ferelden was on the ground, a warhound on top of him, licking his face. "That's not fair!" Cassandra laughed as she set down the books, and then two heads appeared around the corner, watching them. One was dark-haired like her, and the other was dirty-blonde, just a touch lighter than Alistair.

"Boys, did you get him riled up?" she asked as they came forward.

"Honest sis, we were just playing, and then Dane heard the door open and ran out of the room." Her little brother had a small smile on his face, and she patted his head.

"Connor, think you can lie better than Richard?" The other boy shook his head.

"No ma'am, I know better."

"Traitor," Richard whispered.

"No, just wiser than you," Cassandra retorted. "Look, I know it's not fun staying here all day, but you two would get lost out there. Or stolen away by some magister looking for new apprentices. And then what would I tell Connor's parents?"

"That he's going to become a Tevinter citizen?"

"As if that wouldn't kill my poor mother dead," Connor quipped, rolling his eyes.

"Oh, she'd get used to it," Alistair added as Dane finally let him up. "You're still her little boy, no matter what you do."

"I know, Uncle Alistair."

"What is all the ruckus the young squishy mages are making?" A booming voice echoed from down the hall.

"It's just us, Shale!" Cassandra called back. Amid stomping and walls shaking, the golem made her way up to them.

"Ah, it has returned. And with more papers. How typical."

"Once I copy what I need from here, we'll be leaving Tevinter."

"Really? And I was just starting to get used to all the poking and whispers about my "process" again. Such a shame that the elder mage couldn't be here." Cassandra nodded, thinking of Wynne. With the Blight over, the Tower fixed up and partially freed, and talks of outright leaving the Chantry done with, the Spirit inside Wynne had finally been allowed to rest, and she was with the Maker now.

"We all miss her," Richard said, putting a hand on his sister's shoulder. He knew her looks by now, and this was a sad one.

"Right, we do. And now if you'll excuse me, I need to finish this last part." Grabbing the books, Cassandra retreated to the study, locking the door behind her. Once there, she pulled a small box from her robes, turning the package over in her hands before opening it. On top was a note, and she grinned as she read the neat, spiraling handwriting of her favorite bard:

_My dearest friend-_

_I have been able to procure the items you requested, and there was very little trouble involved in acquiring them. I hope this letter finds you in good spirits, and I look forward to hearing how your latest adventure went. On my last excursion, I was able to visit Kirkwall, and met with Grand Cleric Elthina. Things appear to be getting more dire by the moment, and your trip there will need to be a quick one. Please let me know if there is anything else you need. Walk in the Maker's sight._

_Sister Nightingale_

Tossing the letter in the fireplace, she gazed at the two objects in the box. Both were clearly labeled, and she picked one up, turning the vial in her hands as she marveled at its contents. "To think that this is all that separates us from true freedom. Hang on just a little longer, Anders. Help is on the way."

* * *

><p>"Commander, are you sure this is wise?"<p>

"Do you remember the last time you asked me that, Nathaniel?" she retorted, folding her arms across her chest.

"Yes. And I would like an answer." He took a similar stance, quirking an eyebrow at her. Beside him, Oghren rolled his eyes.

"This is the Commander, you sodding blighter!" the Dwarf spoke up. "She's asking us to help her, and I say we go."

"Oghren, she's asking us to help her start a war."

"So? I like war. Besides, things have been quiet since the Blight ended."

"Maybe for you. I've been taking various assignments to keep busy." Oghren smirked a bit.

"Like going to Kirkwall to "check out the Deep Roads"? Admit it, Nathaniel, you're worried about sparkle-fingers too."

"I…We were friends, and no one's heard from him." The ex-noble glanced up at Cassandra, who shook her head. "Are we even sure he still lives?"

"Yes," she answered flatly, eyes narrowing. "Don't ask me how I know, just trust me. But Anders is in trouble, Nathaniel. I need you two to come with me. He's all alone in that damn city, and Isabella said…" Cassandra trailed off, fists clenching.

"We're with you, Commander," Oghren swore.

"You cannot go against the Divine."

"Just help me save Anders," she pleaded. "If you still don't want any part of my plan, we'll bring you back to the Keep. Please." The rogue sighed heavily, pressing his palms to his eyes for a moment

"I must be insane to want to go back there. Even more insane to try and find someone who doesn't want to be found."

"If we have to tear the whole place apart, we will."

"Thanks Oghren, I knew I could count on you both. Pack your things, and we'll get down to the harbor." The Dwarf headed off, but Nathaniel stayed for a moment, staring at her. "Just say it."

"Commander, what happened that has you so afraid for him?" She swallowed and looked down for a moment, closing her eyes. Isabella had explained as much of the situation as she knew it, and the more the pirate had talked, the more worried the mage had become. They needed to get to the City of Chains soon.

"Do you remember those talks you had with Justice? About finding a new host?"

"Vaguely. I suggested he either inhabit a fresher corpse, or find a living body." She looked up, anger in her eyes.

"He found one." The dark-haired man looked puzzled for a moment, but then realization came crashing down on him, and his eyes widened.

"No! Anders didn't-"

"Yes, he did. And neither of them are the same anymore. When Isabella left, it was just getting worse."

"But, can you help him now? They must've known what they were doing?" Cassandra shook her head, wrapping her arms around herself.

"I don't think they thought about the consequences. But I have a plan to help them. Problem is, I only have one chance to do so." Nathaniel put a hand on her shoulder, smiling slightly.

"You gave me another chance at life, and Anders healed me more times than I care to count. I won't make any promises past Kirkwall, but I will help you get him out. He's my friend, and a fellow Grey Warden. We don't abandon our own."

"Thank you." The rogue nodded and left to gather his belongings. Cassandra reached beneath her robe and pulled out the chain with her Joining pendant. However, now it was flanked by two other pendants, and she tapped one gently. "Help is on the way, love. I won't fail again."

* * *

><p><span>Chapter 6.5<span>

Kirkwall was absolutely huge. In fact, it seemed bigger than even Denerim, and Cassandra sighed heavily. They were going to need to split up, and she didn't like that. "All right, here's the plan: We go in pairs to one specific area. If you find Anders, get him to the ship by any means necessary. I don't care if you have to hit him over the head and carry him out."

"Oh, I can do that with no problem," Oghren promised, hitting his palm with a fist. Cassandra sighed and glared at him, and the Dwarf took a step back.

"If you don't see or hear anything, head back to camp. Everyone is to be out of the city by sundown," she continued.

"I can head to Darktown," Isabella suggested. "I might still know people there."

"Take Zevran with you. Nathaniel and Oghren, you two take Lowtown and the docks near there. And if you happen to get supplies, I won't mind either."

"Yes Commander," the human said.

"I guess that means we get Hightown?" Alistair wondered. She nodded, taking his hand and smiling.

"Of course. I'll need you to go into the Chantry and see if they know anything." Everyone headed off to their assigned destinations, and the two lovers made their way to the fancy part of the city, marveling at all the mansions and impressive architecture.

"Cassie… I've been meaning to ask: What are you going to say to him?" She was quiet for a moment, and frowned.

"You mean am I going to demand he explain why he merged with Justice and then never wrote to us? Am I going to ask why he stayed here all this time when he knew Karl was dead? You think I'll insist that he divulge every little detail of the last nine years of his life?"

"Something like that."

"I need to know what's been going on with him, Alistair. I have to understand why he remained here instead of coming home."

"You think he abandoned you?" The King's voice was soft, and she stopped walking, looking up at him, head slightly tilted.

"I… I don't know. Maybe part of me does. But I've had you this whole time, so I haven't been lonely. Isabella said that Anders kept to himself, healing people in his clinic. The few times he sought help, it ended poorly, but she didn't know details."

"And you didn't want to ask your cousin for help?" Cassandra's eyes darkened, and she let out a short, derisive laugh.

"You mean the Templars' lapdog? Don't think I haven't heard the reports from here: A mage who sides with the Knight Commander; forcing mages into the Circle for their "protection". Someone who fears her own powers so much that she took an oath of non-violence before the Grand Cleric. And not to mention her "marriage" to the exiled heir of the Starkhaven throne, who is also a Chantry Brother. Blight take her!"

"That's a bit harsh, don't you think? Maybe she has good reasons."

"What reason could she have to turn her back on her own people? What possible excuse is there to forcing mages to be locked up like criminals? If I ever meet this "Champion" face-to-face, she will regret every action taken against mages." Alistair squeezed her hand, and she took a deep breath. "I'm sorry, love. I didn't mean-"

"No, you meant every word. But I know you're not mad at me, so it's all right." He smiled at her, and she nodded, smiling back a bit.

"I appreciate your understanding. At least you know that not all of us are dangerous." Alistair smirked, which generally meant he was going to say something snarky that she would want to hit him for.

"Oh, you're all **dangerous**, especially you, my dear Warden Commander. However, I know that you choose targets that deserve your ire, not innocents. Were I to be one of these slack-jawed, mob-mentality Templars, things might be different."

"Duncan made a good choice when he pulled you from the Order." The King nodded, a sad smile on his face. Even after all these years, the mention of his mentor brought back hard memories.

"I'd like to think so too." Suddenly, they saw a crowd gathering, and looked at each other in confusion. "Worth a look, I suppose."

"Keep to the back. I'll get up front and see what's going on." Ducking into an alley, Cassandra quickly transformed into her preferred form: A black cat. Alistair followed her until he could go no further due to the packed onlookers, but she slipped through peoples' legs until she came to a clearing. And what she saw caused her to pause, tail twitching slightly. The Knight Commander and First Enchanter stood on the steps of the Chantry, arguing about blood mages and raids on the Circle. And standing in front of them was a girl who was dressed in what appeared to be Chantry robes, but there was a hint of magick to her. Cassandra hissed softly, knowing who she was without needing to see her face. The Champion, Danielle Hawke. She was flanked by two men; one an Elf with a greatsword strapped to his back, and one an archer wearing bright white armor, his bow at his waist.

"Please, isn't there some way we can work this out?" the girl pleaded.

"You know just as well as I do that this must be done, Champion!" the Knight Commander retorted.

"Please Champion, you cannot let her condemn us all. You are one of us!" Danielle shook her head, wrapping her arms around herself.

"No, First Enchanter, I am not one of you. I took an oath to never harm people, magick or otherwise. I am only a healer. Mages who learn offensive spells are a danger to themselves and others. They are the ones who fall to blood magick's vile promises. I said before that I stand with the Knight Commander, and I will not go back on my words. She must be allowed to search the Gallows for anyone that might be corrupted." Cassandra felt her blood boil as she listened to the words of her cousin. What had happened to her that she wholeheartedly believed this garbage she was spewing? By her definition, even Cassandra herself could become a maleficar, and the thought made her tail twitch as her claws dug into the stone beneath her.

"See, the Champion knows that I am right, Orsino! Now there is no one for you to hide behind!"

"Then we will see what Grand Cleric Elthina has to say about this," the Elf mage said as he turned to walk up the steps. But the Templar grabbed his arm, spinning him back around, eyes narrowing.

"You will **not** involve Her Grace in this!" Suddenly, the crowd parted, and Cassandra looked over, eyes wide. Anders. Her Anders was stepping forward, dressed all in black and looking rather determined.

"The Grand Cleric cannot help you," he told the two arguing leaders. The Knight Commander advanced on him, pointing a finger in his face.

"Explain yourself, mage!"

"I will not stand by and watch you treat all mages like criminals," Anders told her, his staff clutched tightly in one hand. "While those who would lead us bow to their Templar jailers." The First Enchanter seemed angry at this accusation.

"How dare you speak to me-"

"The Circle has failed us, Orsino," Anders interrupted. "Even you should be able to see that." And there it was: He started to glow, lines of blue light shining through every part of him, and his eyes an endless void of what seemed like lyrium. Cassandra felt fear rise up in her chest, and she quickly glanced back, trying to see Alistair, but she was too small. Whatever was happening, it wasn't good. "The time has come to act. There can be no half measures." The look on Anders' face was now sad, and the glow ceased as he turned away, head down.

"Anders, what have you done?" Danielle asked softly, staring at him with fear shining brightly in her blue eyes. She was clutching a Chantry amulet tightly.

"There can be no turning back," he whispered, looking up towards the Chantry. The ground began shaking then, and people stood frozen in place. Suddenly, a red light blasted from the center of the Chantry, climbing impossibly high into the air. The building began breaking around it, swirling up into a tightly compacted ball of stone and mortar. Then, as the crowd watched, it paused for just a moment, before exploding outwards in a fine dust and embers. All was silent for a moment as those in the area tried to make sense of what they had just seen.

"Maker have mercy," the Knight Commander said.

"There can be no peace." Cassandra's eyes were focused on Anders, and how desperate and upset he looked as he said those words. He had done what she had wanted to do: He had started a war.


	7. Justice

Chapter 7: Justice

Danielle Hawke stood stone still, staring up at the space where the Chantry had stood only moments ago. Around her, people were running, but her companions were near her, all of them with equally shocked looks. Sebastian was the first to regain his senses. "Elthina no! Maker no!" he cried, falling to his knees. "She was your most faithful; your most beloved. Why didn't she listen to me?" Danielle put a hand on his shoulder, desperately trying not to cry with him and for him. The Grand Cleric had been innocent, as had been the Sisters and Brothers who served her. That someone- a mage- had coldly and cruelly murdered them? It was all too much to bear. Sebastian remained on his knees for a moment, but then stood up, holding out his hand as if to give a blessing. "Blessed be the souls of the faithful, that they ascend to your right hand."

"Why?" Orsino asked, turning to Anders. "Why would you do such a thing?"

"I removed the chance of compromise, because there is no compromise." His voice sounded heavy with emotion, but his face betrayed nothing. Danielle clasped her hands together, praying for the souls of all that had been lost, only half listening. How could he have done that? Had Anders wanted a war so badly that he was willing to damn his soul to the Void for his actions? Why hadn't he tried a peaceful solution? Why hadn't he come to her and asked her to intervene? She hadn't seen him since… Since in the caverns when he'd murdered that mage girl when Justice had hold of him. She had told him that it was better he stop fighting for mages' freedom, and he had agreed. That had been four years ago, and even though his clinic had remained open, she'd never gone back there again.

"The Grand Cleric has been slain by magick," Meredith's voice brought her out of her contemplation, and she looked up. Carver was standing next to her, concern for her in his eyes, and she managed a small nod for her brother's sake. "The Chantry destroyed." The Knight Commander turned to face the assembled Templars and mages who remained at Orsino's side. Most of the crowd had dispersed, thankfully. Her friends were still there as well, even Merrill, which was odd. They weren't close, so what was the Dalish girl doing here? "As Knight Commander of Kirkwall, I hereby invoke the Rite of Annulment! Every mage in the Circle is to be executed immediately." Those words thundered in the Champion's ears, but she knew it was the only way. The Circle had allowed blood mages to hide within its ranks, had allowed others to escape, and now a mage had incited war against the Divine Herself by his actions. There was no other way now.

"The Circle didn't even do this!" Orsino argued, turning to her. "Champion, you can't let her! Help us stop this madness."

"I trust that you will stand with us," Meredith broke in. "This outrage cannot be tolerated." Next to her, Sebastian's fists clenched.

"Why are we debating the Rite of Annulment when the monster who did this is right here? I swear to you, I will kill him." He and Fenris glared at Anders, who did not look away. It was almost as if he was challenging them to do something, and yet even he turned to face her.

"I can't be stopped now. You have to choose," he told her, defiance in his eyes.

"Why didn't you tell me about this?" she asked, tears slipping down her cheeks.

"Because you would've felt honor-bound to stop me," he explained. "The Circle is an injustice in many places beyond Kirkwall. The world needs to see that."

"Elthina was not the Circle," Sebastian shot back. "She was a good woman, and you murdered her!"

"You fool, you've doomed us all!" Orsino added, anger again on his face.

"We were already doomed," Anders told him, eyes darkening. "A quick death now, or a slow one later. I'd rather die fighting." Off to the side, Varric was shaking his head. Next to him, Merrill was fidgeting, eyes wide. Things had happened too quickly, and Hawke's decision was going to affect the entire city. What had Anders been thinking? Suddenly, she felt a hand on her arm, and looked up to see Isabella, who put a finger to her lips and winked.

"Fancy meeting you here, Kitten," the pirate whispered.

"Rivaini!" Varric said in surprise, trying to keep his voice low as well. "Am I glad to see you. What are you doing here?"

"We came for Anders at the behest of the Hero of Ferelden. And boy, is she going to be intrigued by all this." An Elf came up next to Isabella, both hands hovering near the daggers at his waist.

"My dear, it would seem that things are about to get out of hand."

"That's what Kirkwall lives for, Zevran," she said with a shrug.

"Tell me about it," the Dwarf agreed. "Blondie's really done it this time. Listen Rivaini, I need to ask a favor of you."

"Sure Varric, you know I aim to please," she replied with a smile.

"Get Daisy out of here. Whatever's going to happen, I don't want her hurt."

"Varric, no-"

"No arguments. Go with Rivaini and her friend. Get out of Kirkwall and live your life. You deserve it after all you've been through." Merrill nodded, tears in her eyes as she hugged the Dwarf she'd come to regard as a big brother.

"I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you too, Daisy. Now get going."

"Come on, Kitten. We need to run," Isabella said, taking her hand.

"Ah, more beautiful women to add to our group. I'm sure the Warden will welcome you with open arms, little one," Zevran said as they disappeared down the street. With that taken care of, Varric turned his attention back to Hawke.

"Champion, you must help me keep order." Danielle dropped her head, shoulders shaking slightly as the tears fell freely. She felt a hand on her shoulder, and looked to see Sebastian, grim-faced but standing strong. On her other side, Fenris came up, the lyrium markings on his skin pulsing in his anger.

"I cannot overlook this, Knight Commander," she said with a nod. "I will help you." Meredith smirked, but Orsino was horrified.

"Champion, you cannot-"

"I have made my choice," she said, turning away from him.

"Defend yourselves while I warn the others!" the First Enchanter told his people as he raced off.

"I will rouse the rest of the Order!" Meredith said. "Kill any who resist!" The Knight Commander headed back towards the Gallows as the mages readied to fight.

"Sister, get behind me!" Carver ordered as he unsheathed his sword. Danielle did so, standing back as her friends and the Templars tore into the mages, cutting them down easily. She watched as Anders looked on, seated on a crate a little apart from the battle. Finally, the fighting was over, and she breathed a sigh of relief. But there was so much death around her, and there would be more before it was all over. Surely there had been a better way? There had to have been a peaceful solution to all this nonsense.

"Champion, the Knight Commander said you may deal with your… Friend as you see fit," one of the Templars told her with a bow. She nodded, her chest tight. Anders needed to face justice- true mortal justice. And she would see that he did. Walking over to him, she felt her body get heavier with each step.

"There's nothing you can say that I haven't already said to myself," he told her, not looking at her. "I took a Spirit into my soul and changed myself forever to achieve this. This is the justice all mages have awaited."

"You took the law into your own hands!" she argued. "You had no right!"

"You've never been part of the Circle. I have. The people fear what we can do. But to use that fear to bludgeon us into submission is wrong! And they do it with our blessing. Some mages are so convinced of their supposed evil that they welcome any sort of shackles that are placed on them. Some yearn for Tranquility, and others kill themselves rather than face life locked away day after day. I could not let it happen one more day. And if I pay for that with my life… Then I pay. Perhaps then at least Justice would be free." She stared at him, anger and sadness churning inside her, not knowing if she wanted to scream or cry.

"You have to pay for what you've done," she choked out. He shrugged.

" I know. The sooner I die, the sooner you can go help the Templars. Just don't expect them to look at you any different than they looked at me."

"I'm not going to kill you."

"You have to!" Sebastian told her. "He killed Elthina and her acolytes. He destroyed the Chantry. He condemned the Circle with his actions."

"Hawke cannot kill," Fenris shot back. "She has taken a vow to do no harm."

"And you said you would be the one to kill him," Aveline reminded him.

"She is the Champion! It is her duty."

"You are a coward, forcing her to do this!" Carver added.

"I am sworn to the Chantry, the same as she is. But she is the one the Knight

Commander respects. She is the one who must be an example for Kirkwall." Danielle whipped her head around, fear on her face as she stared at the man she loved.

"Do not ask me to do this," she begged. "Do not make me break my vow-" Anders stood up, turning to face her. He held a dagger in his hand, which he placed into hers. She stared at it, eyes wide, holding it tightly in both hands, afraid to move.

"No one can remain on the outskirts of a war. You made your choice, Hawke, and now you must see it through."

"Stop it!" Fenris ordered, walking towards them. However, before he could take more than two steps, Anders grabbed Hawke around her back and pulled her forward. She felt the blade sink into his flesh, and screamed.

"You made your choice," the other mage repeated, slumping against her. A moment later, Fenris pulled her back, and Anders dropped to the ground. Danielle was shaking, but the Elf held her tightly, glaring at the dying man. He raised his sword with one hand, but before he could bring it down, a black cat jumped in front of Anders, hissing. He stared at it, confusion on his face.

"Elf, just leave him," Varric said. "Let him die alone."

"You cannot be serious. He can heal himself."

"He won't," Danielle said softly, calming down a bit. "He wants to die." Sebastian came up beside her, but she turned away from him. Carver embraced her, and she let him lead her away.

"He's a monster," her brother whispered. "I'm just sorry you had to-"

"He killed himself," she said sternly. "I was just a tool to him: Something to hold the blade on which he fell. Let's get back to the Knight Commander." She took off at a jog down the street, the Templars behind her. Fenris glared at Sebastian before leaving as well, Aveline at his heels.

"Varric, was I wrong?"

"You really want the answer to that, Choir-boy?" the Dwarf asked, a hint of anger in his voice. "Seems to me you already know that you were."

"I didn't mean… I never thought… He would do that."

"Then you obviously don't know Blondie. When he gets an idea in his head, he follows it through, no matter what." Sebastian sighed and nodded.

"I'll see you at the Gallows." Casting one final look at Anders, the former Prince raced off after the group. Varric frowned at the mage, who was still struggling to breathe, even with a blade in his chest. The cat was still hissing slightly, claws out.

"Help him," he said, turning away. "If you are the Hero, then help him." The cat stopped hissing and sat in front of Anders, head tilted. The Dwarf then turned down a side street. _'Maker show you mercy, my friend. No one in Kirkwall will any more.'_

* * *

><p><span>Chapter 7.5<span>

When the street was silent, Cassandra assumed her normal form, gently propping Anders up against the stairs. His eyes were starting to glaze over, but he seemed to recognize her. "Co-Commander?" he wheezed. She frowned, putting two fingers to her mouth and whistling a single note. From around the square, her companions came. Alistair, Nathaniel, and Oghren all stared at the dying mage.

"Where's Isabella and Zevran?" the former noble wondered.

"Getting a new friend to safety," Alistair told them. "But we'll be fine." Cassandra quickly pulled a box out of her pack, unwrapping a ring that shone with an inner, blue light. Anders' eyes widened when he saw Justice's ring, and he tried to reach for it, but she batted his hand away easily.

"Grab me a body, and I don't care who it belongs to," she ordered. Oghren dragged over one of the fallen mages, and she placed the ring on the corpse's finger. Taking the chain off her neck, she handed Alistair one of the vials before slipping it back on and tucking it beneath her robes again. "Remember: No matter what happens, you keep up the chant. You'll be his only stability."

"I'll keep him here, don't worry," the King promised.

"Nathaniel, Oghren, you might need to fight Justice. I don't know what this is going to do to him. Just keep him away from Anders until I'm done."

"We will," the Dwarf told her, hefting his axe. She nodded, pulling a potion bottle from the box where the ring had been kept. Her eyes met her fellow mage's, and her heart nearly broke at the sight of him still trying to breathe.

"I love you," she told him, voice cracking. "I want you to know that in case this goes wrong. I never stopped waiting for you, and I always hoped you'd come back on your own. But I'm going to get you out of here. Just you though. I'm sorry it's come to this Anders, but I can't let him have you any more." She uncorked the bottle with her teeth, pinching his nose shut and tipping the contents down his throat. He tried to resist, but ended up swallowing most of the liquid, nearly choking as he did so. She placed a hand over his heart, feeling it beat sluggishly in his chest. His eyes widened, and she grabbed his hand, pressing her forehead against his, tears in her eyes. "I love you." A moment later, his heart stopped beating, and his breath sighed out as his eyes closed. She needed to do this right, or there would be no recourse. "Alistair!"

"Maker, my enemies are abundant. Many are those who rise up against me.  
>But my faith sustains me; I shall not fear the legion, should they set themselves against me." Light began to shine around the former Templar, and the vial in his hands pulsed with a soft glow as he continued to chant. Cassandra steeled herself, focusing on what needed to be done, and waiting for her chance. A moment later, Anders' body began glowing blue, and his eyes snapped open, shining as well.<p>

"I am-" the Spirit began, before realizing what was happening.

"Spirit Pulse," she whispered, directing all of the spell's energy towards the body. It was knocked on its side, and she actually **saw** the Spirit fly out of it as a golden wisp, making a beeline towards the call of the lyrium ring. It took a moment, but the corpse sat up, eyes glowing, and then fading to normal-looking eyes with a slight film over them.

"What have you done?" the Spirit demanded, standing up. Immediately, Nathaniel and Oghren were in front of him, and Cassandra turned her attention to Anders.

"Justice, calm down," the rogue told him. "The Commander did what she felt was necessary." But the Spirit clenched his fists, scowling.

"He had finally achieved part of his goal! To free mages!"

"And he died for it! You forced that on him."

"He wanted to show the world about the injustices his people face. This was the only way to get anyone to listen."

"Are you mad?" Oghren broke in. "You think killing some clerics is a good way to start a positive change? Even I know that's a sodding bad idea."

"What's done is done. Neither of us can change it now."

"Do you even care about what happens to Anders? Did it ever occurr to either of you to ask for help?"

"The people here were too cowed by the Templars; too complacent to lend aid, Nathaniel. And even the other mage he found who wasn't a maleficar was under their control: Convinced that magick would only lead one to demons!"

"That cannot justify this madness!"

"It can! If you are not with me, you are against me." Picking up a staff, Justice attacked the two Wardens, who fought back with everything they had. Meanwhile, Cassandra was focusing lightning into her hands, and she sent it towards Anders' body, which pulsed for a moment before dropping again. She had removed the dagger, but was waiting to heal the wound. Alistair was still chanting, head bowed and eyes closed, but she knew she was wasting time.

"Come back," she begged, shocking him again. Still no effect. "Please." A more powerful jolt, but still nothing. She crawled over to his body, tears streaming down her face, sobs forcing themselves from her throat. He looked so peaceful, so content, that maybe… No! She had promised not to fail again, and she wasn't going to lose yet another person she loved to anyone. _'Deborah, give me the strength to help him. Let me give him a second chance at life. Maker please…'_ She concentrated almost everything she had left into her hand, bringing it down hard on his chest and releasing it one giant burst that caused her own hair to stand on end. "Give him back!" Anders eyes flew open as he coughed, trying to get air into his lungs. She quickly pulled him up, now using the last of her mana to heal him. His breathing became less bubbly, but he kept coughing, and blood poured out of his mouth for a moment as his body took over the repairs on its own. For a minute, they sat there, he trying to catch his breath while his magick enveloped him, and she staring at him. Finally, the white glow around him faded, and she tapped Alistair, who looked up. Seeing Anders alive, he stopped chanting, but a moment later, Nathaniel landed on him.

"Damnit Justice! We aren't your enemies!"

"He not seeing reason?" the King asked, drawing his sword as he got to his feet.

"He never saw reason to begin with." Both men charged back to the fray, where Oghren was battling a group of floating staffs. Cassandra just stared at the scene, torn between helping the others and making sure Anders was okay.

"What's going on?" the other mage whispered, swaying slightly even though he was sitting down.

"Justice isn't too happy with us," she told him, not taking her eyes off the fight.

"Justice?" He looked up, eyes wide and heart skipping a beat for a moment as he beheld the Spirit he'd thought was bound to him fighting in another body. "What-"

"I forced him out of you," she explained. "I gave him a new body. Now he can do whatever he wants without getting you involved further."

"Commander-" She turned back to him, his refusal to use her name doing more damage than seeing him lying dead.

"Anders…" She stood in one fluid motion, fists clenching at her sides. She felt a small surge of mana, and knew it was enough for one more spell. Leaving Anders sitting in confusion, she stalked towards the men, anger in her eyes. "Justice!" Her voice thundered across the empty square, and all of them stopped what they were doing and turned to face her. Even the staffs that had been fighting on their own crashed to the ground, the Spirit's concentration interrupted. "I have had enough of this foolishness!"

"Uh-oh," Alistair said, swallowing nervously. "Warden on the warpath."

"I remember you," Justice said, nodding. "You are the Commander."

"I see time hasn't stripped you of everything," she shot back. "But I want to know: Who decided to do that?" She pointed up where the Chantry had been, eyes narrowing. "Which one of you thought that was a good idea?"

"Both of us. We agreed that something drastic needed to be done in order to show the world the plight of the mages."

"So you thought a mage blowing up a sacred building and all the people in it was a grand way to start a war? Did it ever cross your minds that you might need help?"

"We had none here-"

"Exactly! Why didn't you write to us and tell us what was going on? Why didn't you call in assistance from your friends? Why did you do this alone?"

"Because Anders did not wish for anyone else to be blamed for this."

"And we see how well **that** went. My fool of a cousin is currently helping the Templars hunt down the mages in the city, even though they had nothing to do with this."

"They will know justice as well."

"No, they will only see a Spirit who wishes to kill them, and brand you a demon. You cannot reason with Templars-"

"Cassie…" Alistair started.

"Most Templars," she corrected. "But don't throw us in with them! I for one would have gladly gone along with most of your plan. But now-"

"You abandoned him as well." She closed her mouth, staring in confusion at the Spirit. "No one came for him. No one tried to find him."

"That's not true!" Nathaniel argued. "But he hid from us, because he didn't want to return to the Wardens."

"They betrayed him. They sent a Templar to watch him, and when we merged, he was branded an abomination. They tried to kill him, but I defeated them."

"You… You killed Grey Wardens?" Alistair asked, shock clear in his voice.

"I could not let it end before it had begun."

"Well, it's over now, Justice," Cassandra said through clenched teeth. "Go and do whatever it is you want. I'm taking Anders home."

"He has a duty to-"

"He needs help!" she screamed. "I will not keep him from this war if he truly wishes to fight it, but he's not going alone."

"Then let me come with you."

"No," she stated, turning away. "I will not risk that he'll merge with you again. You have your own body again, Justice. Do with it as you see fit."

"Commander-"

"Get out of my sight!" The Spirit nodded, taking off down the street. Cassandra stood still for a moment, trying to calm her racing heart. Alistair put a hand on her shoulder, and she leaned into him, taking a deep breath. "Did I do the right thing?"

"You helped someone you care about, Cassie. That's always the right thing in my book." He embraced her for a moment, and she nodded. They walked over to Anders, who was sitting still, staring up at them like he expected them to hurt him.

"Can you walk?" she asked as gently as she could.

"I… Not on my own. I don't feel so good," he admitted.

"That would be the deathroot I gave you." Now he looked confused.

"You… Poisoned me?"

"I needed to, Anders. Just be happy I didn't decide to put magebane in there as well." He grimaced, and then Alistair pulled him to his feet, which he was very unsteady on. "Nathaniel, get on his other side." The rogue nodded, and he and the King steadied the mage as best they could.

"You're awfully light," Nathaniel revealed. Anders just nodded, looking away. The group made their way through the city, stopping only once when Alistair decided that carrying Anders over his shoulders was a faster way to travel. The mage put up no resistance, and they continued on. The guards at the gates barely gave them a second glance, and Cassandra breathed a sigh of relief. Getting to the Wounded Coast, they passed other people fleeing Kirkwall, but all gave them a wide berth. Considering how she openly carried a staff, and had grabbed Anders' as well, it was hardly surprising. After a little over an hour at a decent pace, they finally saw their campsite, and Zevran was waving at them.

"You return triumphant I see," the Elf said as Alistair headed for the cave where they slept. He deposited Anders inside, leaning him against the wall, and then saw that there was someone else in there as well.

"Hello," he said cheerfully to the Elf girl who was scrunched into a corner. "I'm sorry if I startled you, but I'm safe, I swear."

"You didn't startle me," she lied, eyes wide. "I… I just like sitting in the dark."

"Merrill," Anders whispered, looking over at her. "They won't hurt you."

"Oh, I know that. Isabella already told me-" She paused, seeing Cassandra standing at the mouth of the cave, and she shrank back a little. "She told me that the Hero of Ferelden was coming for you, but she'd be okay with me coming too."

"You're a fellow mage," Cassandra said, nodding at Alistair, who left. "I'll not let any of our people, human or elven, suffer under the Templars." She crouched in front of Anders, running her hand down his cheek, but he turned away. "What's wrong?"

"How much did you see?" he asked.

"I saw that you had words with the Knight Commander and the First Enchanter, and then the Chantry exploded. How did you do that, anyway?"

"Tevinter ritual. It's one of the few they had that didn't involve blood magick." He looked up at her, fear in his eyes. "So, what happens now?"

"We leave tomorrow for Ferelden. After that we might drop Nathaniel off at the Keep before we head back to Denerim, but that's his decision."

"I mean with me?" She stared at him, puzzled.

"What in Andraste's name are you talking about? You're coming with us."

"You can't be serious! I'm a fugitive. A murderer. You saw what I did back there. How can you just accept it?" She lowered her face until she was inches from his, and her eyes darkened slightly.

"Because I might have done the same thing in your position. As it is, I was planning on starting a rebellion among mages myself. We've been under Templar control long enough, and deserve to lead our own lives outside the Circles."

"Commander-"

"Stop calling me that!" she said, grabbing his coat. "That's not my name." He looked away again, and she shoved him hard into the wall, letting him go. "Just tell me one thing, Anders."

"What is it?"

"What happened to Karl?" He stiffened, eyes wide. "Isabella told us he died, but she didn't know how. I just need to know if he was already gone when you got here." Anders shook his head, and she saw that the rest of him was starting to shake as well. His eyes had gone impossibly wide, and his fists kept clenching. "Anders?" Suddenly, he grabbed her, latching on to her arms like he was trying to steady himself. But then a sob was torn from his throat, and the tears began falling.

"I killed him… They made him Tranquil… And I killed him." And as Cassandra watched, the mage she loved collapsed into her arms, the entirety of his story spilling out as fast as he could draw breath. And she knew then that he was breaking, like she had all those years ago…


	8. Old Wounds

I did change one major thing in regards to canon, but I just felt it suited the story better. Only the mage playthrough didn't have you lose anyone, but seeing death from the start is what made those other origins more... Solid, real? Something. So yes, the whole story of what happened in the Tower.

Chapter 8: Old Wounds

Cassandra stared in shock at the figure in front of her, hoping that her eyes were playing tricks on her, or that it was the Fade messing with her mind. It could not be Niall standing there, looking sad and apprehensive. "Brother?" she called out, walking towards him.

"Who… Cassandra? Maker, what are you doing here? Is Richard all right?" He met her halfway, pulling her into a quick embrace.

"He's fine. Wynne and a few of the others got the children out. And to be honest, I'm not sure what I'm doing here. One moment I was in the Tower, the next I was in a dream about Grey Wardens, and now I'm with you."

"Then the Sloth Demon trapped you too." She frowned, trying to remember what had happened before she got to this place.

"Demon? Yes, I remember something standing there, telling me to sleep." Niall turned away, hanging his head. "We are in the Fade then?"

"Yes, unfortunately. I was trying to get to Uldred, when that Demon got to me."

"What happened here, Niall? How did the Circle get overrun by demons and blood mages?" He sighed, running a hand through his hair.

"There was a meeting of all the Enchanters, discussing how we wanted to handle not only the possibility of a Blight, but the usual wanting to free ourselves from the Chantry. You know me, sister: I would prefer to have a little island somewhere and let us live free and alone."

"People need to learn to live with us, not fear us," she argued gently.

"They never will, and you know it. Sure, our parents weren't horrified by our powers, but I know that it still hurt Mother terribly when we were taken away. I'm sure by the time Richard manifested his gift, she just resigned herself to a life without us."

"It's the Chantry's fault. They force us to be segregated, have holy knights watching over us constantly, and any sort of opposition is met with death or Tranquility. It's not right!" Niall smiled sadly, nodding.

"I know, but then again, they are trying to protect the rest of Thedas from people like Uldred. He is mad with power, and I think he even took the First Enchanter captive. I don't know if he intends to make him an abomination, but whatever he's planning, it's not good. I managed to get the Litany of Adralla from Owain, but then my group was attacked. I haven't seen any of them here, so they're either dead, or trapped in places I cannot get to. And I fear the Demon is using my life energy to fuel this realm." Her eyes widened as Cassandra felt her chest tighten. Why hadn't he said anything sooner?

"What? Then we need to get you out of here!"

"Don't you think I've tried? But everywhere I go, something always blocks my path: A giant door, flames, or even holes that I cannot fit through. It's impossible to get out." She shook her head, fists clenching.

"No, I don't believe that. There must be a way to leave. I will find it." Niall smiled, ruffling her hair.

"You always were the resourceful one. I'll just… Wait here in case you need to return. You can get out by touching that pedestal over there." She nodded, heading for the aforementioned object, and casting a quick glance at him.

"I'll free us, brother. I promise."

* * *

><p>The Sloth Demon was dead, and Cassandra was once again standing in front of her brother. But he still looked sad, and she couldn't figure out why. "Niall?"<p>

"You've done it, Cassandra. You've defeated the Demon and ended his control over this realm. But now… I'm afraid I have to entrust you to do what I could not."

"What are you talking about? You can leave this realm now too! You can help us fight against the blood mages." He put his hands on her shoulders, shaking his head.

"No, I can't. I've been here too long. What will seem like a nap to you has been an eternity for me. I can feel the connection to my body slipping away."

"No… No you can't-" Tears gathered in her eyes, but he pulled her against him, rubbing her back.

"Hush Cassandra, it's all right. I've accepted my fate. I just wish I could've seen Richard one last time. But you'll say goodbye for me, won't you?"

_The two Templars who had been escorting them almost literally threw them into the room, closing the door behind them. Cassandra clung to Niall, staring at the other children, who were looking at them like they were new toys. But one finally came over, extending a hand, and welcoming them to the Circle. Niall introduced them, but she rarely strayed far from her brother's side, all of this too new for her._

"Niall… I'll tell him, don't worry. We always looked up to you, both of us. You were always the strong one, the clever one."

"And you were always more powerful. Even the First Enchanter agreed you would make a fine mage. I think that's why he wanted you to join the Grey Wardens, so that you could prove yourself to the world."

_She had begun using elemental spells, and Niall just cautioned her to be careful. After all, Deborah wasn't around every second to make sure she didn't burn, electrocute, or freeze herself. Cassandra just laughed, promising to watch herself, and vowing to be as strong as he was one day._

"I wasn't strong enough to help you."

"Don't worry about me. I'll be with the Maker soon, and I'll always be watching over you two. Make sure to save as many of the others as you can. Prove to the world that mages are good people."

"I will, I promise." He pulled back, smiling a little.

"Do you think… Do you think Mother and Father would be proud of me?" She nodded, her throat feeling tight.

_Niall had passed his Harrowing, and was moving out of the apprentice quarters. She was happy for him, but a little scared to be on her own. He just ruffled her hair, telling her that she wasn't truly alone. She would be fine with the friends she had, and would probably make more in no time._

"Of course they would be! I'm proud of you too, for getting as far as you did, and for not giving in to the Demon. I'm going to miss you so much, big brother." She felt a tug on her very essence, and knew she was waking up. But she didn't want to go; didn't want to leave Niall alone in his final moments.

"I'll miss you too, little sister. I am so proud of you." She tried to reach out to him, and their fingers brushed for a just a moment as he smiled. "Goodbye Cassandra."

"Niall!" The Fade swirled around her, and her mind went blank for a moment. The next thing she knew, Alistair was shaking her.

"Hey, are you all right?" he asked. She blinked, and then suddenly was stumbling towards a body on the floor. Dropping to her knees, she let the tears flow for a moment, closing Niall's eyes and smoothing his hair.

"Oh dear," Wynne whispered, coming over. "I'm so sorry, Warden."

"Who was he?" Lelianna asked softly. Cassandra wiped her eyes on her sleeve, searching his pockets and pulling out the scroll. She unfurled it, confirmed its contents, and then stood up. There would be time to properly grieve after Uldred had been dealt with. The bard was in front of her however, sadness in her eyes.

"He was my older brother," she replied. Lelianna's eyes grew wide, and she covered her mouth with her hand, looking at the body.

"I am so, so sorry. Are you… All right?"

"I am for now. Come on, we've got a Circle to save." Alistair came up beside her, concern on his face.

"Cassandra, if you need a moment-"

"We need to stop this madness before Uldred gets to the First Enchanter. Niall said he has him prisoner, and might try to make him an abomination." Wynne gasped.

"If Irving succumbs-"  
>"We can't let that happen," she interrupted. "I will be upset later. Right now, I need to keep focused on killing that bastard and anyone working with him."<p>

"We're right behind you," Alistair vowed. She nodded, looking down the hallway and praying she didn't find anyone else she cared about already gone.

* * *

><p>The Circle was safe, or at least as safe as it could be. Uldred was dead, and Irving was still in his right mind. Knight Commander Greagoir declared that they no longer needed the Rite of Annulment, and allowed Cassandra to enter the Tower again to search for other survivors. She headed straight for the infirmary, which she had not checked on before clearing everything. Alistair kicked the doors open, and they beheld an awful scene: Bodies lay strewn about everywhere, mostly Templars and mages, with a few abominations scattered around. Fear gripped her, and she began moving around the room, hoping beyond hope that either Deborah was not here, or that she was alive but unconscious. "Look for a blonde girl, a little shorter than me, with a healer's robe on," she ordered her friends. They nodded, each taking a section of the room. Cassandra began pulling bodies up to check beneath them, her chest tightening with every face she saw. Some she recognized, but others she did not know: Either too young, or too old. But when she rolled over an abomination, she froze, eyes taking in the scene even as her mind refused to comprehend it.<p>

"Hey, did you-" Alistair began, but then saw the look on her face. There was no color to her, and she was shaking as if freezing. Her eyes were wide, but they weren't really focused on anything in particular. He went to her, his own eyes seeing the body of a young woman lying there, the point of a sword coming out of her chest, and claw marks running down the length of her. Her blonde hair was blood-streaked, but still managed to frame her pale face. With her eyes closed, she might even have been sleeping, if not for the violence done to her body. Beneath her lay a Templar, eyes sightless as he stared at the ceiling. Cassandra went to her knees, no sound coming from her mouth even as her lips were trying to form words. Shakily, she grabbed the girl's hand, tugging on it.

_The little blonde was always sitting in the corner, tucked away from everyone else, and Cassandra finally decided to go talk with her. It took some coaxing, but she soon learned her name was Deborah, and she wanted to be a healer. The greatest healer Thedas had ever seen, in fact. Cassandra smiled at the high ambitions of her new friend, vowing to help her achieve her goal._

"Deborah," she whispered. "Come on silly, it's time to get up." There was no response, so she pulled harder. "Please get up. The danger's over. The Circle is safe." Still nothing, and she gently shook her body, even as Alistair felt tears in his eyes as he watched. Lelianna came over, but stopped when she realized what was going on. Her hand flew to her mouth in horror.

"Warden… I don't think she can hear you." Cassandra glared up at them, her whole body still shaking.

"I know that! I'm trying to wake her up. Deborah always was a sound sleeper."

"Sweetie, she's not-"

"Yes she is!"

_They had ducked into what seemed like a deserted corner to share a quick kiss. However, that turned into a frantic pull of robes, and the two of them crashed down on top of a very shocked Finn, who had snuck off to read. They giggled as he hastily grabbed his books, every part of him scarlet. When he was gone, they continued where they'd left off, keeping their eyes open for any nosy Templars._

Wynne came over at the commotion, but Alistair turned to her and shook his head. The older mage's breath hitched in her throat as she watched. "Come on Deborah, please wake up," Cassandra continued to beg. Her hand gently caressed the girl's cheek, tears glistening in her eyes. "You have to get up." Finally, Alistair could stand it no longer, and knelt behind her, grabbing his fellow Warden around the waist.

"There's nothing you can do for her, Cassandra. She's gone."

"No! No, she can't be! Let me go, Alistair! She's not dead! She's not gone, she can't be! I promised I'd come back for her! I swore I'd always protect her! I can't lose her too!" But she was lifted away from Deborah, and he set her down near the door, almost dropping her as she struggled to get away. "**No**, don't take me away! I can't leave her again! She needs me, Alistair!"

"She's with the Maker now, my friend. She feels no pain," Lelianna tried to comfort her, but the mage would have none of it.

"She doesn't belong with the Maker, she belongs with me! She was everything to me! I loved her… She can't be gone!"

_She was leaving the Tower to become a Grey Warden. Deborah wasn't happy about it, but she understood. Cassandra promised to visit, and maybe there was need in the Wardens for a healer. She would come back and take Deborah away from all the shackles they had to bear. Maybe in the Wardens, they could find meaning and purpose, where not much existed in the Circle. Deborah promised to wait for that day when they would be together again. So long as her Cassie was with her, she would fear nothing._

Alistair held her tightly as her cries of protest turned into sobs, and then finally, wordless screams of agony. Nothing else mattered to her now that Deborah was gone. Her very reason for living had been snuffed out, so what was the point of fighting this stupid war? Why should she try to save Ferelden, when no one gave a damn about her or any of the other mages in the Circle? What was the reason she needed to risk life and limb to help them, when they would just as soon leave her people to die cold and forgotten in this Maker-forsaken Tower? No hope, no reason, no possible point to going forward existed now. Deborah had a Templar's sword through her. Why? Had he been afraid of her turning into an abomination? Had he tried to use her as a shield and then thought to kill both her and the creature attacking them? It just didn't make sense. Deborah did not know any offensive spells, and putting her in front would only have terrified her more. Vaguely, she felt anger rise in her chest, felt the heat swirl around her as the fire inside her struggled to manifest. But then she realized that someone was holding her. Someone with a very strong grip.

"Draw your last breath, my friends. Cross the Veil and the Fade and all the stars in the sky. Rest at the Maker's right hand, and be Forgiven." That was a part of the Chant of Light. "Here lies the abyss, the well of all souls. From these emerald waters doth life begin anew. Come to me, child, and I shall embrace you. In my arms lies Eternity." Alistair. That was Alistair's voice. He was praying. For Deborah? Cassandra lifted her head, seeing a soft glow around him as he kept his head bowed against her, eyes closed.

"Warden?" Wynne asked softly. She glanced up, eyesight blurry because of the tears. Lelianna and Wynne were kneeling behind Alistair, their hands on her shoulders. And then she felt other hands on her back, and turned a bit. Richard was standing there, looking sad. And beside him were a few of her other friends from the Circle: Petra, Finn, and Neria. All of them were around her, offering what comfort they could. Alistair stopped chanting, and the glow around him faded.

"Hey there," he said softly. "Welcome back." She blinked in confusion, wondering where she had gone.

"You've been quiet for over an hour, sister," Richard told her, hugging her as best he could with Alistair still in the way.

"An hour?" Her throat felt scratchy, and her head ached. She sat back, and her fellow Warden released his grip on her, which allowed Richard to climb into her lap. Holding her little brother close, she rocked herself, humming a soft lullaby. Lelianna seemed to know the tune, and joined in. The assembled group allowed the music to carry them for a while, as the Warden mage held the only connection she still had to the world.

* * *

><p>Some time later, the young apprentices were being tucked into bed, and the older survivors were gathering to discuss what would happen now. Wynne had made it clear to Irving that she was going to accompany the Wardens against the Blight, and he had agreed. "There you are," the older woman said, finding Cassandra sitting on her brother's bed, stroking his hair while he slept.<p>

"Did you need me for something?"

"I just wanted to make sure you were all right. You gave all of us quite a scare earlier." Wynne folded her arms over her chest, staring down at her, and Cassandra sighed and shook her head.

"What, I'm not allowed to lose myself? I can't grieve for someone I loved?"

"I didn't say that, my dear. But you are one of the Grey Wardens, and that does carry quite a bit of responsibility." The younger woman's eyes narrowed.

"I know what I have to do, Wynne. Coming here wasn't something I was looking forward to, but neither was I expecting to find my home overrun with Demons."

"None of us expected that."

"Then what exactly is the issue?" Wynne sat down next to her, eyes not leaving her face. Cassandra felt like she was going to get a lecture any moment.

"Why did you allow yourself to fall in love? You know the risks that carried."

"I didn't plan to, but it happened. Trust me, I don't think either of us realized what was happening until it was all said and done." She looked away, hands in her lap, and Wynne put a hand on her shoulder.

"Would you take any of it back?" Cassandra shook her head, still not looking up.

"Never. I wouldn't trade a single moment that we shared. It would just diminish how we felt about each other."

"Then that is her legacy to you. I know she was a wonderful healer; one that would have saved the entirety of Thedas if she was asked. Now you must carry on that duty, and save Ferelden from the Blight. If you do not, the rest of the world will fall."

"I…" Cassandra pursed her lips, still not sure that she would truly be able to do anything against the horde of darkspawn and the archdemon. "I have to try, at least."

"That's all you can do," Wynne said, giving her shoulders a quick squeeze. Someone cleared their throat at the door, and both mages looked up to see Alistair standing there, smiling slighlty. He walked towards them, and Cassandra saw he had something in his hand.

"I um… Found this in the infirmary. Apparently it's a letter for you, Cassandra." Her eyes wide, she snatched the paper from his outstretched fingers, quickly scanning the delicate script on it. Wynne left them, nodding and smiling at the warrior, who blushed.

_Cassie-_

_It's been quite a while since you left for Ostagar, and I was relieved to hear that you survived. I don't believe any of those lies that Teryn Loghain is spreading about your Order, because I know that you would never betray our King. Life has been all right here at the Circle, and I'm starting to make new friends. There's a boy in my Herbalism class who can't seem to keep quiet, but at least he's nice. Petra and I are studying together now, and she says it won't be long before I am called for my Harrowing. Once I am a full mage, maybe I can join you. I know that you said you'd come back for me, but I need to start relying on myself as well. You were my rock for so long, it almost seemed that I would be swept away if you weren't here, but you taught me well. When I see you next, I'll show you how strong I've become, and you won't need to worry about me ever again._

_All my love,_

_Deborah_

She clutched the paper to her chest, trying to stifle the sobs that were building up inside her. Alistiar dropped to his knees in front of her, tentatively reaching out to embrace her. She allowed him to pull her off the bed and into his arms, welcoming the stability he offered. Closing her eyes, she cried into his shoulder, thankful that he'd taken off his armor. He kissed the top of her head. "Everything's going to be all right," he assured her.

"Eventually," she agreed. Her arms came around to encircle his back, and she breathed in the scent of sweat, soap, and metal that clung to him. "Thank you."

"For what?"

"For bringing me back. I heard you praying, and it brought me out of my own mind. I don't know what I would have done without you, Alistair." He pulled back and smiled at her, his eyes lighting up as well.

"And I don't know what I'd do if I lost you. I know this is going to be difficult for you for a while, but I want you to know: I'm here, whenever and however you need me." She wiped her tears away with her sleeve, nodding.

"I just might take you up on that offer. For now, just hold me."

"Your wish is my command." They stayed on the floor, holding each other, until Wynne came to get them after the meeting was over, shaking her head at the two Wardens, a smile on her face.

* * *

><p><span>Chapter 8.5<span>

Cassandra continued to hold the man in her arms, quietly listening to his story, even as his voice got more desperate and afraid. Merrill had left soon after Anders had started crying, but now she returned. Looking up, the Hero saw all of the camp at the entrance to the cave, but she said nothing. Alistair moved first, kneeling next to her and placing one hand on her shoulder, and another on her fellow mage's. Isabella and Zevran came up as well, the Elf on Alistair's other side, and the pirate behind Anders. Connor and Richard stood behind her, leaning on their staffs. Merrill circled around and laid her head on Anders' back, murmuring something none of them recognized. Finally, Nathaniel and Oghren stepped forward, and the rogue knelt next to his fellow Warden, placing a hand on his shoulder and giving it a squeeze. The Dwarf stood to the side, seemingly unsure what to do, but finally just put a hand on the healer's head. Even Shale stood there, Dane at her side, silently watching the scene. After a little while, his story full told, Anders shifted, and the group gave him space. "Feel any better?" she asked softly. He looked up at her, and then his eyes traveled over the faces of the others. Everyone was smiling slighty, and Merrill was wiping the tears from her eyes.

"A little," he replied, voice hoarse. He stayed in her arms, too weak to move. One by one, the others left them alone again, even the Dalish girl.

"I'm sorry you had to go through all of that," she said after a minute. He looked up again, eyes red and tears still on his face.

"Comm-" She placed a hand over his mouth, and he stared at her in surprise.

"Anders, what is my name?" He blinked, shaking his head. "You're not allowed to use my title. Only my name. What is it?" She removed her hand, and he sighed, closing his eyes for a moment.

"You don't hate me, Cassie?" The sound of her name out of his mouth sent her heart soaring, and she couldn't help but smile.

"I could never hate you," she told him, kissing his forehead. Anders tried to sit up, and she propped him against the wall again. "I just wish you would have written."

"I was ashamed about what happened with Karl. And then the more I stayed, the more Justice kept insisting that we help what mages we could get out of Kirkwall. And then when we confronted Ser Alrik about making good mages Tranquil, and I lost control…" He took a shuddering breath, and she grabbed his hand, running her other hand down his cheek, drying his tears with her sleeve.

"You're safe now. Whatever happened in that city, it's over." His eyes met hers, and he shook his head.

"It's not over. Hawke will-" Her eyes darkened again.

"Let me worry about my cousin. She and I are going to have words. Mostly about how she just betrayed everything she is to help those who would see us locked away for merely existing." Anders nodded, swallowing nervously.

"I condemned the Circle. I am responsible for their deaths."

"No, Knight Commander Meredith is. She didn't need to invoke the Rite of Annulment, but she did. Hopefully there will be survivors, and we'll take them with us." He nodded, feeling everything he had dealt with over the last decade pressing down on him, and his eyes fluttered closed. "Get some rest."

"Don't leave me," he whispered, fingers tightening around her hand. She smiled, smoothing out his hair as best she could.

"I won't leave you. Not ever again."

* * *

><p>Anders awoke some time later, but couldn't see anything. Panic set in almost immediately, and he sat up, feeling something across his waist. Everything about his time in solitary came rushing back, and his breath refused to come. Suddenly, he felt a hand near his face, and a moment later, the blanket that had been covering him was yanked off. Cassandra was sitting there, and even in the dim light he could see the concern on her face. Without another word, she pulled him tight against her, and he clung to her, calming himself. "Some all-powerful mage I am," he said after a few minutes. "Can't even have a blanket on me without panicing."<p>

"You've had a busy day," she reminded him. "Besides, I don't mind being here for you." He pulled back, smiling slightly.

"I missed you so much, Cassie."

"And I you. Now come on, let's get some food in you," she said as she stood. Offering him a hand, she pulled him to his feet, but he had to still lean on her. Between the poison she'd given him earlier, Justice being ripped from him, and not having had a decent meal in a while, he wasn't exactly at his best. The two of them walked out of the cave towards the fire, and Nathaniel and Alistair turned their heads when they heard them. Shale looked back from her position at the head of the camp, but saw that it was nothing worth her time, and went back to watching for movement in the darkness.

"Nice of you to join us, ser mage," Alistair said as Cassandra set him down against one of the logs they'd been using as seats.

"You gave us quite a scare, my friend," Nathaniel added, placing his bow at his side. Anders blushed, looking down at his lap for a moment.

"I'm sorry for all the trouble I caused."

"What, you mean the Chantry exploding? Don't be silly. Cassie was planning on waging a holy war anyway. You just beat her to it," Alistair told him.

"She **what**?"

"Did you think you were the only mage who is tired of the status quo?" she asked, handing him a bowl of stew. Anders shrugged, wasting no time in digging into the food.

"What do you plan to do now, Commander?"

"Well, I suppose that depends on what happens next. Word is going to spread about this, and I doubt the other Circles will take kindly to the slaying of fellow mages for a crime they didn't commit."

"This is going to be worse than the Blight," Alistair predicted. "It's going to be mages against the Chantry, with all of Thedas caught in the middle."

"I know. We're going to have to be very careful with Orlais. The last thing Ferelden needs is another invasion, Exalted March or not."

"Anora's going to be very unhappy when I tell her about all this." Cassandra stared at him, shaking her head.

"Don't tell her," she advised. "At least, not all the sordid details. It'll be enough for her to know that we expect trouble. As it is, I'll send word to the Tower, telling them they have my full support should anything happen."

"The First Warden isn't going to like this," Nathaniel surmised.

"Then the First Warden can crawl out of his bloody base in the Anderfels and tell me himself!" She stood up, beginning to pace, and all three men watched her. "I am not going to sit idly by while my people finally demand what they deserve. This has nothing to do with politics, and everything to do with just wanting to live."

"It's my fault," Anders finally spoke up. "I should be the one to answer for this."

"You already have," she shot back. "As far as anyone knows, the apostate responsible was killed in Kirkwall. Besides, Justice is still running around in that Maker-forsaken city, and he'll probably bear some of the blame as well." Anders grimaced as she talked about the Spirit, but said nothing.

"That reminds me," Nathaniel said. "What in Andraste's name made you want to be possessed by him, Anders?"

"It wasn't possession," the healer argued. "It was a merge of sorts. I was still the one in control…Sort of. And we both thought we would work together to free the mages. But… My anger at the Templars was worse than I thought. Justice became warped by that, and turned into Vengeance. It was the worst feeling in the world, knowing that I had done that to him."

"You couldn't have known it would be that bad," Alistair said softly.

"That doesn't change what happened. And every time he took over, it was like I was a puppet: Seeing out my eyes, but unable to move my own limbs to stop whatever he was trying to do." He pulled his legs against his chest, wrapping his arms around them. Cassandra moved to go to him, but Alistair got there first. He sat next to Anders, wrapping an arm around his shoulders.

"That nightmare is over, my friend. Cassie and I will make sure you never have to relive anything like it again." Both the men smiled, and Cassandra felt her heart flutter. Alistair understood the situation better than she'd hoped, and he would do everything he could to keep his promise.

"Thank you," Anders said softly. "I don't know what I did to deserve such loyalty." She dropped onto his other side, leaning her head on his arm.

"You're a fellow Warden, a mage, and one of my loves, Anders. The only thing you need to do now is swear to fight with us."

"Unless you've learned to heal that much better, you're going to need me, Cassie. Besides, I can't let you have all the fun when you face down the army of the Divine," he vowed, smiling slightly.

"Glad to have you back again," Nathaniel added, shaking his head and smiling as well. "Life was starting to get predictable."

"And Maker knows we can't have **that**. I mean, what's life without a crisis or two?" Alistair teased as they all dissolved into laughter.


	9. Family Ties

So we finally get to the "showdown" between Hawke and Amell. And yes, this Hawke follows orders, even if she's not 100% sure they're right. She wants to trust Meredith, and follows her rather blindly. Word of advice: Never anger a Warden mage.

Chapter 9: Family Ties

Morning arrived, and the group began packing up their campsite, eager to get back on Isabella's ship. Merrill approached Anders, who was sitting by the fire, staring into it. When she placed a hand on his shoulder, he jumped a bit, and she pulled back. "I'm sorry," she said when he turned to face her. "I just… I wanted to make sure you were all right. You know, after yesterday and everything that happened."

"I'm all right, Merrill," he said softly, smiling a little. "Look, I know we haven't always seen eye to eye on everything but… I'm glad you're with us, instead of in Kirkwall. How did you find the others, anyway?"

"Varric told me to go with Isabella and her friend Zevran. They brought me back here, and then a little while later, you got carried in." Anders blushed slightly, remembering the rather unceremonious way he'd been transported out of the city. Not that he'd had the energy to argue with the King at the time. "Anders… Why did you do that? Why did you force the issue of war?"

"It seemed like a good idea at the time," he told her, sighing heavily. "Something to make everyone see that mages no longer needed to fear their oppressors. No amount of talking or begging was going to change things, and the Knight Commander was just forcing the Circle there to turn to blood magick faster."

"You really hate blood mages, don't you?" she asked softly, sitting next to him.

"Demons cannot be trusted. Even you knew that. But the price they can exact on you: Turning you into an abomination… I don't know why anyone would take the risk."

"I suppose you know that better than anyone." He frowned, running a hand through his hair, but Merrill did not look away from him. "Say what you like, but there were times that you were not in control of that Spirit, and you know it." She watched as he shuddered for a moment, hugging his arms tight against his chest.

"I know," he finally whispered. "I just never wanted to admit how much control Justice really had over me. It terrified me, knowing that I was slowly losing myself to nothing but rage. I guess that's why it made sense to do what I did: It was an outlet for our feelings, and he was satisfied for the moment."

"Why did you help me at Sundermount?" Merrill wondered, picking at her shirt. "Creators know I gave you every reason not to trust me, and you still came."

"Varric asked me to come," he revealed. "He told me that you were going to confront your Demon, and since Hawke refused to help, he thought I was the next best thing. To be honest, I fully intended to try and kill the Demon when you tried to "talk", or whatever had been your original plan." She nodded, tears starting to form in her eyes.

"Why did the Keeper do that? Why did she sacrifice herself for me?" Anders put a hand on her shoulder, and she looked up.

"She loved you, Merrill, like a daughter. I think that's why they stayed close to Kirkwall for so long: She was waiting for you to come home. And when you didn't, she took matters into her own hands to save you."

"She didn't trust me."

"No!" His fingers tightened their grip, and her eyes widened. "She didn't trust the Demon not to hurt you! It was never about you Merrill, but what you were dealing with." He let her go, burying his face in his hands for a moment. "It's the same reason Cassandra took Justice out of me. She was trying to make sure he didn't hurt me."

"Nice to see you agree with my view," the aforementioned mage said as she came over to them. Merrill started to stand, but she placed a gentle hand on her head, smiling down at the Dalish girl. "If you're coming with us Merrill, I have one simple command."

"What's that?"

"No blood magick. I heard a rumor that the Demon you made your pact with was destroyed. Is that correct?"

"Yes, he was. My Keeper allowed him to possess her, and we… I…" Cassandra dropped to the Elf's side, hugging her as she began crying. "I killed her."

"She was very brave, this Keeper of yours. To give her life to save yours was a truly noble thing."

"I just wish there had been a better way." Merrill pulled back, wiping her eyes.

"You can ask "what if" a thousand times, but it won't change what happened. All you can do now is try and live your life to honor her sacrifice."

"Have you lost people you care about, Warden?" Cassandra nodded, and Anders put a hand on her shoulder, offering silent support.

"War takes things and people you never expect it to. That's why we need to get back to Ferelden: To minimize how many mage lives will be lost in all this."

"Warden," Shale suddenly said from her vantage point by the path. "There are two groups of flesh creatures approaching us. One appears to be much shorter than the other." Everyone looked over to where the golem was pointing, and Cassandra stood up to get a better look. It took a minute or so, but her eyes finally saw the scene: A group of children were running as fast as they could, surrounding a woman who was holding a toddler in her arms. Behind them, gaining ground, was her cousin and her companions.

"Andraste's ashes, what is that idiot doing?"

"Commander, are those kids?" Nathaniel asked, sounding angry.

"Probably stragglers from the Circle," she told him, eyes narrowing.

"By the Stone, they're chasing baby sparklers?" Oghren seemed horrified, and the rest of the camp looked at her.

"Are we to defend the children?" Zevran wondered.

"We don't all need to go." She stood by Shale, her blood boiling as the groups got closer. The golem looked at her, what passed for a smirk on her face.

"It intends to help the tiny mages?"

"It does." Shale shrugged, the crystals embedded in her skin lighting up.

"Then we had better hurry." Cassandra nodded, and the two of them took off towards the groups. However, they were just in time to see an arrow loosed from Sebastian's bow strike the older woman in the back, and she toppled to the ground. The child she'd been holding spilled from her arms, tumbling for a moment before laying there screaming hysterically. The other children, five in total, huddled together, eyes wide. The Champion stood in front of them, shaking her head sadly.

"I am sorry," she told them. "But the Rite of Annullment extends to everyone."

"Mercy!" one of the boys called out, his arms around a slightly younger girl.

"I'm sorry," Sebastian echoed, nocking another arrow. "These are the orders of the Knight Commander." A moment later, a wall of fire stood between them and the children, and Hawke gave a surprised scream as she cowered behind Fenris and Carver.

"Touch those children, and Kirkwall is going to need a new Champion!" Cassandra's voice thundered around them, and she stepped out of the fire, followed by a golem that was glowing with green and violet crystals.

"And just who are you?" the Elf demanded, lyrium markings lighting up. She sensed the power in him and quirked an eyebrow.

"My name is Cassandra Amell."

"The Hero of Ferelden?" Fenris looked a bit perplexed by her arrival, and it seemed that he had at least heard of her.

"Cousin?" Hawke asked tentatively, stepping forward. However, a bolt of lightning landed at her feet, and she jumped back, eyes wide.

"Not a step further," the Warden mage warned. The fire that had been shielding the children disappeared, but Shale now stood as a barrier to them. Movement at her back forced Cassandra's eyes away from their enemies, and she saw Alistair pick up the screaming child, attempting to calm it.

"Shh, you're all right now, sweetie. It's okay," he crooned, rocking it gently. After a moment, the child's screams died down to whimpers, and the King glared at Hawke and her friends as well. "You attack children now?" he demanded. Meanwhile, Merrill went up to the woman on the ground, but by the look of horror and sadness on her face, Cassandra guessed that she was already dead.

"The Knight Commander ordered that everyone in the Circle be executed. I cannot stay my hand just because of their age!" The Champion replied, fists clenched.

"How much of a lapdog are you?" Cassandra asked, eyes narrowing. "That you would blindly follow orders that go against any sort of decency and common sense. These children cannot possibly hurt you, so why kill them?"

"They are mages! That makes them dangerous!"

"You're a mage too, you blighted moron!" Hawke pulled back, surprised by the ferocity her cousin displayed.

"But I'm not like them. I'm only a healer. I took a vow to never harm anyone."

"Words, that's all that is. You could learn spells to hurt people just as easily as I did. That you choose not to speaks only of your ignorance and fear of your gift."

"Gift? Is that what you call it?" the Elf demanded, snarling. "Magick is a curse! Any who wield it will eventually fall to the lust for power."

"Including my cousin?"

"Fenris does not need to answer to you," the archer shot back. "Now stand aside Hero, and let Kirkwall take care of its own problems."

"Since when does Starkhaven royalty involve themselves in another city's issues?" Cassandra smirked, but her anger was steadily growing.

"I was pledged to the Chantry here, and I will make sure that their deaths are avenged. It is my duty."

"Didn't you kill the one responsible already?" Hawke paled a bit, but Carver came up behind her, sword out.

"He paid for his crimes, yes. But we must still obey the Knight Commander."

"Listen to yourselves!" Merrill admonished. "You think this makes you any more righteous in your god's eyes? Only someone like Fen'harel would approve of this!"

"Merrill, are you siding with the mages? I would have thought you went back to your clan?" Hawke asked, looking perplexed.

"I have no clan to return to, Hawke. But if siding with the mages means that I won't let you harm these children, then yes."

"You will fall with them," Fenris warned, the lyrium pulsing again.

"Warden, are you not going to silence the pointy-wielding Elf? I find its tirades to be entirely boring."

"I was saving him for you, Shale." The golem made a "huff" sound.

"Lucky me," she mused sarcastically.

"Do not trifle with me, mage. You do not know what I can do."

"Actually Fenris, I do," she shot back, hands on her hips. "But that's neither here nor there. I'd rather not have to fight you. Just walk away from this, and I will take these children with me and leave the Free Marches."

"We cannot let you do that," Hawke said sadly. "Please understand cousin-"

"Do **not** call me that! You are no family of mine if you insist on killing your own people. Had I known you were living in Lothering, I'd have saved the darkspawn the trouble and just taken you out myself."

"Watch your tongue!" Carver shouted, taking a step towards her. "Our sister was killed by an Ogre during our escape! She died bravely."

"A warrior like you?"

"No, a mage like me," Hawke answered, eyes downcast. "Bethany tried to attack the Ogre, and it killed her. If she hadn't antagonized it… If she'd just stayed down…" Carver turned to her, eyes wide as his jaw fell open.

"Sister, what are you saying? It would have killed both her and Mother."

"Mother's dead now too. What difference would it have made?"

"Enough you two," Fenris barked at them, patience wearing thin. "We need to finish this." His sword was up again, but Merrill stepped up beside Cassandra.

"Let me help," she whispered. "Please."

"Protect the children. That's all I need you to do. I'll handle them." The Dalish girl nodded, and the Warden mage stepped further towards the other group. "If you think you can defeat me, then come at me, warrior. But you only get one try." Fenris smirked, glowing blue now.

"More than enough to finish you." He charged, coming at her faster than she should've been able to see. But Cassandra focused for a moment, blasting him with powerful force magick, and knocking him off his feet. An arrow came at her, but she shifted her attention, and it caught fire, burning to ash in mere moments. And then Carver was chanting something, and she saw the glow form around him.

"Not this time," she vowed, blasting the entire area with lightning. All of them were stunned, and the Templar fell back, cursing as he felt the bolt ricochet off the inside of his armor for a moment. "Now leave us alone!"

"I will not!" Hawke shouted, getting shakily to her feet. "I cannot let you do this, Hero or not. What sort of Demon have you joined yourself with to acquire such bold powers? Or are you going to try and convince me that it's a "Fade Spirit" like Anders-" A fireball exploded only inches to her right, and she cowered for a moment. When next Hawke looked at her cousin, her eyes went impossibly wide. Cassandra stood there, her body wreathed in flames and a palpable sense of hatred surrounding her. Eyes narrowed, jaw clenched, staff clutched so hard in one hand the wood was creaking, and her other hand shaking at her side.

"Don't you **dare** speak his name!" she fumed, the words said slowly and with as much venom as she could muster. "You don't know him, and you have no idea what he went through before you met him."

"He was an abomination! How can you defend him?"

"Because I got to know him, unlike you. I grew up in the Circle, just like he did. We both saw what happened there, with the Templars and all the rules you had to live by. All to make "normal" people think they were safe from us. You cannot keep people locked up like criminals just because they were born with magick."

"But magick exists to serve mankind, and-" The fire around Cassandra intensified, and she ground her teeth so hard that even Alistair heard it.

"Don't you spout that Chantry nonsense at me! I know what the Chant of Light says, and I say it's propaganda, nothing more."

"Those are the words of Andraste herself!" Sebastian countered.

"Prove it! Show me that she herself penned those lines, and that it wasn't someone who was just terrified of the Tevinter magisters. Andraste fought against slavery and tyranny, yet the Chantry deals with us in those ways."

"Do not talk of slavery to me, mage!" Fenris shouted. "I have seen firsthand the lengths and depths to which magisters will sink and sell themselves to for power. All mages are at risk of doing the same thing."

"I do not need to sell my soul to a Demon for power. I do not need to rely on my blood for the kick to my spells. I do not need to hide from the world when I have done **nothing** wrong except exist!" The anger fairly exploded out of her, and the fire surrounded her enemies, and they shrunk away from it. Carver went to banish it, but found that he could not move. Fenris also found his limbs restricted, and turned a quick glance to Hawke and Sebastian. By the shocked and scared looks on their faces, he could guess that they were in the same predicament.

"Let us go!" Hawke begged, struggling in vain. But a moment later, she found the breath squeezed from her lungs, and her eyes widened. Cassandra stepped closer, a wicked grin on her face.

"Why should I?" she asked, voice eerily calm. "You're asking me to show you mercy, when you would not have done the same for those children. The Knight Commander ordered their deaths? That's fine. But understand this: No one has ordered me to kill you, but I will if it means defending innocents."

"Cassandra, stop!" She heard his voice, but shook her head, not turning around.

"Why should I? They brought this on themselves."

"Cassie please, don't do this!" Anders begged, standing behind her now. Hawke and the others would have gasped at the sight of him, had they that much air to do so. "If you kill them, you'll be no better than the Knight Commander. You have to let them see for themselves that this is wrong." Now she turned, tears in her eyes, but the spell held.

"They left you alone, hurt you in ways I can't even fathom, and wanted you dead for what you and Justice did. How can you defend them?"

"Because I don't think they're bad people," he told her. "And you should not judge them before they know the whole story. Let them go. You've proven they can't stand up to you, so let them go back to Kirkwall. We'll take the children and never come back." He wrapped his arms around her, pressing her tight against him. "Don't lose yourself to anger like I did. Please love, don't follow my lead on that. Even without a Spirit inside you, it would change you forever. You risked everything to save me. Don't leave me alone again." A moment later, she brought her arms up to circle his waist, sobbing into his chest. The fire died out as the others felt their bodies able to move and breathe freely again. "Just go," Anders told them.

"You cannot possibly think we'll just-"

"Sebastian," Hawke said, shaking her head. "We're leaving." She cast a fearful look at her cousin, knowing that she owed Anders their lives for stopping her. Though why he thought she needed to "know the whole story" was beyond her. The Knight Commander was right, and she would follow the woman's edicts.

"**What**? Just like that?"

"She could have killed us, you bloody fool!" Carver shouted. The archer clenched his fists, glaring at Anders and the woman he held.

"This isn't over," he vowed.

"Yes, it is," Cassandra whispered, flexing her fingers for a moment. Sebastian heard wood crunch, looking down to see that his grandfather's bow was now in two pieces. He was about to retort, when they heard a shout down the road, and turned to see who it was. Anders swallowed nervously, and Alistair pulled him back quickly, leaving Cassandra to stare in surprise as Cullen made his way up to the group.

"Champion!" he called out, raising his hand in greeting. However, when he saw the state that everyone was in, his hand immediately went to his weapon, but he did not draw it. "Are you all right?"

"We're fine," Hawke told him with a curt nod. "Is there something you needed?"

"The Knight Commander asks that you return to the city. We have successfully put down the last of the Circle, and she wishes to discuss what will happen now."His eyes traveled up the path slighty, widening when he recognized the figure that stood there, tears in her eyes. "Lady Amell?" His voice came out softer than he wanted it to, and he looked away for a moment.

"Still can't face me, Cullen?" Cassandra asked, walking towards him. Her usual smirk was back in place now, and she dabbed at her eyes with her sleeve to rid herself of the last of her tears.

"I… It's been quite a while, that's all. What are you doing here?"

"Sightseeing," Alistair offered as he came up next to her, the child still in his arms. "Thought we'd see how Kirkwall was doing, what with all the rumors being bandied about. And just as we get here: Pandemonium. So we're heading back to Ferelden, and staying there." Cullen quirked an eyebrow when he recognized the King, but said nothing to the others.

"You brought your… Family with you?" the Templar asked hesitantly. Alistair shrugged, handing the child to Cassandra, who stood silent.

"Well, I can't just leave a little one home while we travel about, now can I?"

"No, I suppose that wouldn't be wise. I'm glad to see you unharmed after yesterday's events. Maker speed you on your journey home."

"Thank you."

"It was nice to see you again, Lady Amell," Cullen said as he turned around. "I just wish it was under better circumstances."

"Me too." Hawke followed the Knight Captain back towards the city, flanked by Fenris and Sebastian. Carver cast a last look at the Warden mage before turning as well.

"Maker forgive me, but I never saw anyone with you, Hero. Go back to Ferelden and leave us in peace."

"Tell your sister that if she ever reconsiders her views, she can seek me out, Templar. Until then, I better not see her, or I will do more than make it hard to breathe." When the last of their enemies was out of sight, she took a deep breath, closing her eyes for a moment. The child in her arms started to whimper again, and she placed a hand on… Yes, she should try to figure out whether it was a boy or a girl, shouldn't she? Taking her first good look at the little one, Cassandra's eyes widened. Blonde hair to the shoulders, chubby cheeks, and leaf-green eyes that were framed by long lashes. She looked like… "What is her name?" she demanded of the other children, walking around Shale to see them. Anders was still hiding behind the golem, but she smiled at him, and he relaxed a bit. The eldest child, an Elven boy of around ten, shook his head.

"We don't know, ma'am. Enchanter Elyssa never told us her daughter's name. She just went to fetch her from a friend before we all fled the city."

"She was going to protect us," the boy who had asked for mercy spoke up. "But when the Champion told her to stop, she told us to run faster and not look back."

"You poor things!" Merrill said, hugging as many of them as she could reach.

"I still can't believe that Hawke was going to…" Anders trailed off, shaking his head in frustration. "We have to go."

"Agreed. All right kids, here's the new plan: We're going to let you pay your last respects to Enchanter Elyssa, and then we're bringing you to Ferelden."

"Ferelden? Will we be safe there?" the Elven boy asked.

"On my word as King," Alistair swore. With mouths agape, the children stared at him, and Shale sighed heavily.

"Wonderful, the whiny one has rendered them immobile. Shall I be forced to heave them onto the ship like little fleshy barrels?" Everyone stared at the golem, and Cassandra shook her head and laughed as the kids all ran to hide behind Alistair.

"Shale… We'll meet you at the ship, all right?"

"Yes, an exciting journey awaits me: Locked in the dark and feeling like the floor under my feet is going to give way any moment, and I shall plummet to the bottom of the sea. Perhaps I shall start walking back to Ferelden, and see it in a few months?"

"Commander, where did you find this go-"

"Shale, Nathaniel. Her name is Shale. And we found her trying to stop the Blight. Remember, she helped too."

"Helped with the stomping of darkspawn, anyway," Oghren said with a shrug. "Was a real downer at camp, though."

"As if the drunken Dwarf was ever able to do more than ask about alcohol or wander around confessing his feelings for the fleshy females."

"Bah, you were sweet on me too, you stony-"

"Oghren!" Cassandra yelled, and he looked over. She motioned with her head towards the children, who were all listening intently. "Not now."

"Come on then, get your lazy arses back to the ship so we can leave this place!" Isabella admonished the others, turning on her heel and walking down the path. Zevran followed close behind her, and Oghren and Nathaniel headed off as well. Shale stomped after them, and it was only then that Cassandra realized that neither Connor nor Richard was present. Fear momentarily clutched at her chest, but she put two fingers to her mouth and whistled two notes. Dane immediately charged from the cave, and the children scattered, screaming. The Mabari jumped around her, barking excitedly, but the little one in her arms began crying, clutching her tightly.

"Down boy!" she called out, and he immediately dropped to the ground, tail wagging. "Everyone, it's okay. Dane is my friend. He's going to make sure you all stay safe as well. I promise he won't bite." She shot the Mabari a playful glare, and he whimpered. At that moment, her brother and Connor stuck their heads out of the cave, and walked over when they saw that the Champion and her group was gone. "Why were you two hiding? I'd have expected that from Merril and Anders, but you shouldn't have feared those bumblers."

"Hey!" Anders said, sounding offended.

"I think she means that we wouldn't have wanted to be seen by Hawke and the others," Merrill clarified. Richard shook his head, eyes wide.

"Sis, it wasn't her we were scared of." She quirked an eyebrow, waiting for him to continue, and he sighed. "We… I never told you about what happened after you left to take down the archdemon. And even before you came back to take us away from the Circle, things were-"

"What did Cullen do?" Anders asked them, eyes darkening. Both boys sighed, hanging their heads.

"He attacked some of the Enchanters who had protected us."

"And then shortly after I got there, he accused Knight Commander Greagoir of being under the influence of blood magick," Connor added. Cassandra, Alistair, and Anders all shared shocked looks with each other.

"I knew he was paranoid, but… Mother of Andraste, he attacked people?" Anders asked, knowing that it had probably been after he'd escaped the last time.

"Who?" Cassandra demanded, walking closer. "And did he kill anyone?"

"No, thank the Maker," Richard said. "It was Petra and Neria. He accused them of being abominations in hiding, and drew his sword on them. But he just swung at them; he didn't smite them or anything like that, and they dropped him easily."

"First Enchanter Irving was the one who suggested he be moved out of the region, and Kirkwall sent word that they would take him."

"Of course," Alistair mused, rolling his eyes. "What better second to a paranoid Knight Commander than one who shares it?"

"We will talk in detail later. For now, help us build a pyre for one of our Kirkwall sisters, and then we'll get these kids settled on the ship." Both boys nodded, and Richard pointed to the child she held, a small smile on his face.

"So sis, when did you become a mother?" She shrugged, holding the child tighter.

"Right now."

* * *

><p>Getting everyone settled on the ship had been easier than they'd all thought. There were enough provisions to last until they reached Amaranthine, which meant Cassandra had a bit of time to figure out what she wanted to do. They now had six children with them, at least five of them known mages, and all under twelve. There was no way that Anora would allow them all to remain at the palace, and she did not want to send them to Ferelden's Circle. With any luck, word of the tragedy in Kirkwall would reach home soon after they did, and there would probably be an immediate upheavel at the Tower. No, what everyone needed was a refuge; a place they could all stay where no one would ever bother them. She smiled ruefully and shook her head, staring at the vast expanse of water. Even at night, you could still see the waves. <em>'Damnit Niall, you were right all along. Maybe we should just sequester ourselves, or at least the children, until they can fend for themselves.'<em>

"Copper for your thoughts?" Alistair asked, coming up next to her and leaning on the railing. He'd taken off his armor once the cabin situation had been dealt with, and she ran her hand down his arm, squeezing his hand when she reached it.

"Thank you for stepping in with Cullen," she told him. "I'm not sure what I would have said in that state." He grimaced, putting an arm around her shoulders and pulling her closer.

"Don't scare me like that again. I've never seen you so angry, Cassandra."

"Very few things can drive me to that point, Alistair. Anyone who threatens you or Anders is going to feel my wrath."

"You know, we are grown men," he reminded her. "We can take care of ourselves." She chuckled, shaking her head.

"Ah yes, the senior Grey Warden who was almost a Templar, letting himself get yanked all over Ferelden by the newly-Joined mage. And then we have the Warden apostate who joined with a Spirit and wreaked havoc on the City of Chains. I can't leave you two alone for a second."

"You might have to," Anders said as he came up, looking tired. "The baby is crying for her mother. Merrill thinks you might be able to calm her." Cassandra swallowed nervously, but nodded.

"I'll give it a try," she said, heading towards the kids' cabin. Anders watched her go, leaning back against the railing, arms across his chest.

"Thank you for watching over her, your Highness." Alistair turned slightly to face him, a small smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

"Cassandra Amell can take care of herself, trust me. She had the whole "unite Ferelden" thing under control quickly enough."

"And she whipped Vigil's Keep into shape as well."

"Did someone mention whips?" Isabella called out from behind the helm. Both Wardens looked at each other before deciding to ignore the pirate.

"You know what I meant," the mage said, turning around to stare at the dark waters. "You were there for her when I wasn't."

"I love her," the warrior replied with a shrug.

"I know. She loves you too."

"But I wasn't the one to bring her out of that… Rage she was in. Thank you for that, by the way." Anders shivered slightly, remembering the look on her face. He vaguely wondered if he'd had the same look when Justice took over.

"I wasn't about to let her do something she would regret later. Thank the Maker she listened to me. She's usually so headstrong."

"She's needed to be, to deal with everything that's been put upon her."

"And yet she still managed to share her heart with us." They were silent for a few more minutes, before the King ran a hand through his hair, sighing.

"We're going to have to get used to each other," he brought up. "Whether we like it or not, we fell in love with a woman who loves the both of us in return. I'm not saying we all need to jump into bed together-"

"That would be interesting," Anders quipped, winking. Alistair opened his mouth to say something, thought better of it, and went back to looking over the railing. "Sorry, was that out of line?"

"No, I just forgot for a moment that you like men too."

"Don't worry, my King, I have no intentions of waking up next to you. At least in a bedroom setting." Alistair frowned, shaking his head.

"I think the only one who wouldn't appreciate that would be me. Even Cassandra would get a rise out of it." Anders shrugged and smirked.

"Most women probably would. Much as I'm sure you enjoyed your time sharing Isabella with her?" The warrior blushed, and they both heard the pirate laugh and mention something about wet frocks. The mage sighed before continuing: "I just… I don't want to get in the way of whatever you two have. It's been almost ten years. I never expected to even see Cassandra again. She's the consort of the King. Why would she waste her time coming after me?" Alistair lightly punched his shoulder, and he looked up, startled. "What?"

"She loves you, remember? Besides, it's not always fun and games at the palace. We have a very… Practical arrangment, I suppose you could call it. I'm the King of Ferelden, married to another woman. But my Queen well knows about Cassie, and the two of them get along for the most part. I know Anora has dalliances with one or two of the nobles in Court, but I don't care. Other than ruling together, we really keep to ourselves, though I think we've at least reached a "friends" stage. I can even stand to hear about her father without wanting to hold my ears shut, and she sometimes lets me prattle on about Duncan, my mentor from the Wardens."

"Cassandra told us about him," Anders said with a nod. "He sounded like a very noble, brave man."

"Best person you could ever want at your back. His death nearly destroyed me. If it hadn't been for Cassie, I never would have made it through."

"She's very good at helping others through difficult times."

"She always seems to know just what to do or say to make the situation seem less… Hopeless. Even with you, she never gave up the hope that we would find you, separate you from… Justice? And then bring you home."

"I wish you could have met him in Amaranthine, when he was more himself. Justice was so noble; so intent on righting every wrong we came across, that it just made you want to fight with him. Nathaniel always argued that he only saw a black and white version of the world, instead of the shades of grey we deal with every day. But sometimes you just need to put the world into simple terms to make sense of it all."

"I know he was your friend, Anders, but do you really think that everything he did was a good thing? You said yourself: Sometimes you tried to stop him from doing something. Which meant you didn't agree with it." The healer rested his head on his arms for a moment, closing his eyes.

"That's true. I had a hard time calming him down if there were Templars or people who hated mages nearby. All he wanted to do was kill them, to make sure they could never hurt anyone again. And that drive cost a young girl her life." He felt a hand on his shoulder, and looked up to see Alistair smiling.

"You can't dwell on the past forever. Eventually you'll replace that with happier memories. Hopefully sooner, rather than later. Cassie told me that we were all going to be one big, happy family when you brought Karl back from Kirkwall. I know it'll take some getting used to, but we can all still be a family." Anders blinked, swallowing the lump of emotion that was starting to build up. A family. He'd hoped to find something like that in Kirkwall, even after Karl was gone. But Hawke had been terrified of him, and he'd alienated Merrill based on his own prejudices and fears. He was glad Varric had asked him to help her that last time. And now, here he was, being offered something he'd thought to never have again.

"Your High-"

"Alistair," he admonished gently. "No titles between us, all right?"

"I'm the only one who **doesn't** have a title." The King shrugged, grinning.

"And we don't want you to feel bad about that, so we'll just use names. Like we're normal people. Do you remember what it feels like to be normal?" Anders shook his head, also grinning.

"Not a clue."

"Me neither!" The two men dissolved into laughter as the ship sailed on.


	10. Going Forward

Back home to Ferelden, where things settle down. But they won't stay that way. Special thanks to my beta reader Kimmie for helping me name the kitten. And no, this is **NOT** a Harry Potter crossover. Trust me, I've heard all the jokes about Cassandra's school idea.

Chapter 10: Going Forward

Denerim was in full bustle when the group arrived at the palace. Servants immediately stopped what they were doing and bowed to their King, and a few of them went ahead to let Queen Anora know her husband had returned. Erlina met them at the main hall, her face showing confusion when she noticed the children. "My King, you return! And with so many guests."

"Yes, well, there was quite a bit that happened on our trip. I'll tell Anora the details. But could you please get everyone settled in?" The Elven woman bowed.

"But of course. Please follow me, everyone."

"I'll stay with the children," Merrill told her, as Cassandra patted her shoulder.

"As you wish, madam," the handmaiden said as the others followed her down the hall. Cassandra shifted the child in her arms to her other hip, looking up at Alistair and Anders with a grin.

"Let's not keep the Queen waiting." Alistair rolled his eyes and sighed.

"You're having way too much fun with this." He led them to his personal quarters, and opened the door. Immediately, he was jumped on by a small form, falling backwards with a laugh. "Guess who!"

"Father!" the little boy squeeled, latching onto Alistair's neck. His dirty-blonde hair was short, much like the King's, and his blue eyes sparkled with adoration. Alistair's arms wrapped around the child, holding him tight. Anders' eyes went wide, and he quirked an eyebrow at Cassandra.

"Father?" he asked softly.

"Prince Caden was born two years after the Blight," she explained. "Alistair knew he needed an heir to pass everything on to, and Anora agreed that they should have a child together. I've never seen him happier than when he's with his son." He saw the wistful look on her face, and how she hugged the little girl to her a bit more. For a Warden to have children with a non-tainted partner was very rare. For two Wardens… It would take a miracle.

"Aunt Cassandra!" The boy suddenly realized who was standing there, and smiled. However, his attention also went to Anders and the child. "Who are they?"

"This," she said, pointing to her fellow mage "Is Anders. He's with me. And this," she hefted the girl up, and she grinned shyly at Caden. "Is little Deborah. Her mother died, so I've adopted her." She'd wrestled with the idea the whole way over on the ship, and finally decided just to do it. The girl deserved a family, and Cassandra was going to give her the best one she possibly could. Her new name had simply been an automatic thing, since she shared many physical traits with the long-dead healer.

"So she's like my cousin?" Caden asked, gently touching her hand. Deborah giggled and grabbed his finger, and the Prince smiled.

"No sweetie," Queen Anora said with a sigh, standing in the doorway. "She's simply the child of a good friend of your father." Cassandra and Anders bowed to her.

"Good to see you, Anora," the Hero Warden said. The Queen allowed a small smile to grace her features, but it did not remain long.

"You as well. Are you staying put for a while?"

"We might need to," Alistair said as he got to his feet. "There's been a bit of an… Issue with Kirkwall. I think we need to discuss it." Anora frowned, crossing her arms over her chest as her gaze drifted to Cassandra.

"For once, I didn't do it," she teased.

"Mother, may I go with Aunt Cassandra?" Caden wondered.

"That sounds like a good idea," Alistair quickly agreed. "Mommy and I will come find you when we're done talking, all right?"

"Okay!" Grinning from ear to ear, Caden took hold of Cassandra's hand and skipped down the hall, Anders trailing behind them. They found a quiet section near a window and all sat down, the little Prince perched on the seat below the window.

"Caden, have you been taking care of my little friends?" Cassandra asked, winking at him. He picked up on her tone immediately, and smiled wider.

"Yes, and the really little ones have gotten much bigger! I keep the door shut so they don't get lost."

"Thank you very much for doing that for me." Anders looked very confused at their conversation, and they both giggled.

"So… Are you a mage too?" the boy asked him after a few moments.

"I am. Your Aunt and I grew up in the Tower together."

"Are you a Warden?"

"Yes. Cassandra consripted me in Amarathine many years ago."

"Why did she do that? Did the Circle not want to let you go, like the Chantry did with my father?" Anders grimaced, shaking his head as the memory of that time came back. Did he tell the boy the truth? Yes, that was probably the best idea.

"No, the Templars didn't want me to join." Caden nodded, frowning a little.

"I don't like Templars. They're mean to mages." Cassandra smiled and patted the boy. He'd learned well from her.

"Caden," she said, a thought coming to her. "Would you like to meet mages who are around your age? They came with us from Kirkwall." His eyes lit up, and she stood once more and took his hand. Heading for the guest section, it took them only a little while to find Merrill and the children, who all stared at the little Prince.

"Hello again, Warden. Who's this little boy?" the Dalish girl asked.

"I'm Caden!" he said proudly, but then blushed for a moment. "I mean, I'm Prince Caden, but you don't need to call me that." The other children looked at each other, and then the Elven boy stepped forward, hand outstretched.

"I'm Kieve. These are my friends." The others all walked over, smiling.

"I'm Ian, and this is my little sister Fiona."

"My name is Kendra. A pleasure to meet you."

"Hi, I'm Aden. I'm six!" The adult mages all shared smiles as the children sat down to talk. Merrill walked over to them, seemingly more at ease.

"A Prince? Is he King Alistair's son then?"

"Yes, and he's a good kid," Cassandra told her. "Merrill, is it all right if we left him in your care? After the ship, I'd like to have some "alone time" with Anders." The Elf looked confused for a moment, but then started blushing.

"Oh, of course! Yes, I'll watch him. Did you want to leave the baby too?" Cassandra involuntarily clutched the girl tighter, shaking her head. Anders put a hand on her shoulder, whispering in her ear:

"She won't disappear, I promise." She sighed, knowing that he spoke the truth, and handed Deborah to Merrill. She kissed the top of the blonde head.

"I'll be back in a bit, sweetie. I promise." Wide-eyed, the girl watched her go, and Cassandra felt guilty for doing something she seemingly had every right to. Was this what being a mother involved? Wanting to be with your children at all times? "Why do I feel bad about leaving her?"

"Because you care for her," her fellow mage said, taking her hand. "And because you've been almost inseperable from her since Alistair first handed her to you."

"Remind me to thank him for that later." The tone in her voice was slightly sarcastice, but he knew she meant what she said. They finally reached her quarters, and Cassandra opened the door, smiling mischieviously. "You first," she told him. He shrugged, walking into the large room, staring in awe at the size of her quarters. They were a bit larger than her room at the Keep, and even the bed-

He stared at the bed. There were little balls of fur lying on it, all curled up. Two of them were cat-sized, and two of them were much smaller, kitten-sized balls. He took a step closer, and one of the balls moved, raising its head and blinking sleepily at him. Eyes wide, Anders locked gazes with someone he never thought he'd see again.

"Ser-Pounce-a-Lot?" he called softly. The cat's ears pricked up, and he slowly stretched and padded over to the edge of the bed, leaping off after only a moment's hesitation. Once he was on the ground though, he made a beeline for the mage, twining around his legs and mewling like he was still a kitten. Anders picked him up, tears in his eyes as his faithful friend rubbed his head against his cheek. "I missed you so much. Did you miss me? Who are your friends?" Turning his attention to the bed, he realized that the other balls of fluff were now uncurling themselves, and a gray cat stood with two kittens next to it, one an exact copy of Pounce, and one that looked like its mother.

"Delilah Howe told me that you were forced to give up Pounce after I left. You had asked her to take care of him until you got back, and when she found out I was going after you, she gave him and his mate to me," Cassandra explained as she walked up beside him. "We didn't know she was going to have kittens until I woke up one morning to find her lying smugly next to me, the babies still wet. If I hadn't been so thrilled, I would have thrown her out the door."

"Have you named them yet?" She smiled, seeing how gently he held Pounce, who was no longer as spry as he once was.

"Not the boy. I wanted you to name him, since you named his father. But I call the mother Lady Priss, and the little girl is Duchess." Anders started laughing, and she rolled her eyes. "If you have a problem with my names, just say it."

"I think they're fine names. Just understated is all. Let's see now…" He looked at the orange kitten for a moment, and the kitten merely stared back, tail slowly waving behind it. "All right, your name is now Squire Purrington." Cassandra started chuckling, and he turned to her, pouting. "What? You don't like it?"

"It's a fine name, Anders. I'm sure he'll live up to it some day." He placed Pounce gently back on the bed, and the kittens nuzzled their father. Anders circled his arms around her waist, smiling again.

"Maker, I have missed you. You always know exactly what to do to make me happy. How can I ever repay you?" She quirked an eyebrow, grinning.

"I can think of a few things. Follow me." She turned and pulled him into an adjoining room, and he saw the it was a bath area, and it was already full of water. "Good, Erlina told the servants I was back." She tugged on her robe, loosening it as she walked. "Come on, a bath will do us both some good." He immediately complied, stripping out of his coat and shirt before she turned back around, now only in her smallclothes. However, she frowned a bit and walked over to him, her fingers gently caressing his chest. It took him a moment to realize what she was doing, and then Anders silently cursed. She was tracing the bones she could see beneath his skin, her worry visibly increasing with each one. He took hold of her hands, and she looked up, puzzled.

"You're ruining the mood, you know," he teased.

"How did you get so thin? I just thought Nathaniel was teasing when he called you light, but even I could knock you down with little effort."

"I lived with the refugees, remember? There wasn't a lot of coin going around, and I never charged for healing them. Varric would bring me to the local tavern and get me food, but that wasn't all the time. I learned to live with it."

"I'm sorry-" She was silenced a moment later as he pressed her tight against him, his mouth locking on to hers with more force than she'd ever remembered him using before. His hands slowly climbed her back, and he trailed kisses down her neck to her collarbone. A sigh escaped her, and he chuckled.

"Now then, Commander, shall I be the one giving **you** orders?" She quirked an eyebrow, lips curling into a smirk as her hands dropped to encircle his waist.

"I would very much like to see you try." She found herself against the wall, Anders again attacking her mouth with his own. Cassandra allowed herself to relax, hands beginning to roam over his chest and back as she traced and retraced every line and curve he had. Some she knew, and others were new, but she welcomed every sensation. Anders, for his part, was simply lost in the ecstasy of the moment. For too long he'd had to hold back; to put a lid on his feelings lest Justice/Vengeance take control when he least expected it. A sudden rise of lust and desire surged through him, and his heart felt like it was going to burst out of his chest. The raw need frightened him for a moment, and he paused, looking down to find that both of them were naked and in the water. Andraste's knickers, when had **that** happened? "Anders?" she asked, feeling him tense up.

"I'm sorry, I just… I've had to keep my emotions in check so long, that I'm not used to them. Now that it's just me, I need to learn to feel again." She grinned, a wicked, feral smile that brought a new wave of desire crashing through him. He wanted everything that smile promised, and more.

"I'll make sure you feel everything," she vowed, knocking him back into the water and landing on him. "This Joining should be much more to your liking, Warden."

* * *

><p>Later that night, Cassandra awoke to hear soft whimpers. Rolling over, she went to go to Deborah, but the baby was not in her crib. Fear stabbed through her, and she sat bolt upright, heart pounding in her chest. However, a figure at the window turned, and she saw that Anders held the little girl, rocking her softly. He walked over, smiling as Deborah stopped her cries and stuck her fingers in her mouth, relaxing against him. "Sorry, I was hoping she wouldn't wake you."<p>

"You went to her?" He raised an eyebrow, confusion clear on his face.

"Was I not supposed to? I heard her starting to cry, and I wanted to make sure she was okay. Just a bad dream though." A smile graced Cassandra's features for a moment, and she shook her head, tugging gently on his pants until he sat next to her.

"I guess I just didn't expect you to jump into caring for her so fast. After all, it's not like I talked to you or Alistair before deciding I'd raise her." She leaned against his shoulder, smoothing out the little girl's hair as Deborah continued to suck on her fingers, eyes fluttering closed even as she fought to stay awake.

"Would you prefer to be the only adult in her life?" He sounded sad, and she met his gaze. He was half-smiling, but there was a tinge of… Something that she couldn't quite place. It was the same look she'd seen from him when he'd met Caden.

"Anders… You always wanted a family, didn't you?" He sighed heavily, resting his chin lightly on the little girl's head.

"Who didn't? It was everything we should have been able to have, but were denied. You couldn't marry, couldn't have children, and I'm sure the Chantry wasn't happy with our dalliances as it was. At least in Ferelden, we were given a little more… Freedom isn't the right word, but it wasn't as strict as far as relationships. But yes, I always hoped that one day I'd find a pretty girl and settle down. You know, after I finally got the Templars off my back once and for all." Cassandra felt a tightness in her chest as she thought of all the children like her and Anders who'd been pulled from their families. They were alone, with no one to care for them except other mages; and even then, it wasn't exactly like a family. You made alliances and formed bonds with people out of neccessity at first, and then strengthened or cut those ties as you got older. But there needed to be some stability; some kind of starting point where you learned to trust. Truth be told, she hadn't much thought of having a family of her own, especially after the Blight. Riordan had told her that Grey Warden women were usually rendered barren after the Joining, and she had been upset by that news at first. She'd slowly come to accept it, but seeing Alistair with his son sometimes brought all the hurt and guilt back that **she** would never be the one to give him a child. And now her fellow mage was feeling the same way, and she leaned up and kissed his cheek.

"Little girls need a man in their life. Someone to run to when monsters chase them in the Fade, a knee to sit on and hear stories on a cold night, and loving arms that will never let go no matter how old she gets."

"You forgot to add in the part about threatening to freeze solid any idiot who tries to get close to her." They both grinned, looking down at the now-sleeping girl.

"I don't know. I think **I'll** be the much scarier parent." Anders chuckled, placing Deborah gently back in her crib and tucking the blanket around her chin. He also removed both Duchess and Squire Purrington from near her head, putting them both at the foot of their bed. The kittens barely registered the change of scenery.

"The Hero Warden of Ferelden, Commander of the Grey, and might I add: One rowdy firebrand between the sheets." She pulled him back down onto the bed, wrapping her arms around him.

"Flattery will get you nowhere," she teased.

"On the contrary, my dear. Flattery has gotten me almost everywhere." They lay together for a bit, just holding each other. Finally, Cassandra sighed, rubbing her eyes.

"I can't help but think that we should do something for our people: Something significant to help them when the war comes. As much as I'd be on the front lines fighting the Templars, there's something else that's on my mind."

"I would think having you fight with us would be a great help."

"Trust me, if it weren't for the kids, I might have killed Hawke and the others that day. That would have been a grand thing to have told, wouldn't it? The Hero kills the Champion of Kirkwall, her own flesh and blood. All to protect apostate children she didn't know from being executed under the Knight Commander's orders. I'd be shipped off to Val Royeux or made Tranquil on the spot. But what they wanted to do was just…"

"It's all right, Cassie," he said, pulling her closer and kissing the top of her head. "No Templar is going to get close to you or Deborah while I'm still here."

"I know. But as much as we can take care of ourselves, it's the children who suffer for this. If only there was a place they could go, to be safe from the outside world until they were powerful enough to safeguard themselves. The Circles aren't the best place for them, especially when you have the Chantry involved, and then force them to take the Harrowing."

"A place of learning, where being a mage is seen as a wonderful thing, not a curse. Having teachers and mentors who truly wish to show you the best way to use your abilities, whatever they might be." They looked at each other, eyes wide.

"A school! Hidden away where the rest of the world either cannot or will not bother them. And then they can make their own way in the world, either living quietly or doing as much good as possible." Cassandra sounded giddy at the thought of all this, and sat up again, startling the kittens, who leapt off the bed. "But where to build it?"

"I doubt we could build such a place," Anders argued gently. "It would take too long. We'd need a place **now** where mages could run to. But you're right about being hidden. Maybe the Anderfels?"

"Too close to the First Warden," she said, shaking her head as she stood up and began to thoughtfully pace at the edge of the bed. "I wouldn't want to risk him dropping in to see what new recruits he could take."

"Well, Orlais is out of the question, as is the Free Marches."

"Yes, you saw to that region not liking us for a while." Anders frowned and crossed his arms over his chest, shaking his head.

"Rivain is too close to the Qunari. I've had enough of them to last several lifetimes. And Tevinter-"

"Is right out. We'd be attempting to teach these children proper magick, not how to sell out everything you hold dear for power."

"That reminds me. I've been meaning to ask something rather important: How in the Maker's name did you separate me from Justice? I always thought that Spirit possession persisted until the body died." She frowned, looking down for a moment as she stopped pacing.

"It does. I… I killed you, Anders." He began patting himself, looking perplexed.

"This case of death is taking quite a while to kick in, then. I feel fine."

"Then you don't remember me giving you something after you stabbed yourself using Hawke as a brace?" Anders ducked his head, shaking it. He didn't remember much of that day, Maker be praised. If he did, he'd probably be more insane than he already was. "I gave you a deathroot potion: One specifically designed to stop your heart from beating. And when you "died", Justice took over, and I kicked him out."

"How? That's certainly no spell that I'm aware of."

"Tevinter," she shot back with a shrug. "I went there for a bit to learn what I could, and came across various spells and rituals involving Spirit possession and reversing not only it, but a Demon's bond as well."

"And you put two and two together and made… Whatever it was that helped me."

"Two spells, actually." She sat next to him, rubbing his arm. "One was to anchor your soul in your body until I got it breathing and such again, and the other was a variation on a repulsion spell. I just interwove spirit and force magick together to affect Justice, and then he sought the nearest power source, which I made sure was the ring."

"He loved that thing," Anders remembered fondly.

"I'm just glad that Aura kept it all these years. When I told her what had happened, she all but begged me to use it to help you. She said that you'd tried to do the right thing for both her and Justice, and you shouldn't have to pay the price alone."

"It was my anger that turned him into something he wasn't," the healer shot back. "If I'd realized how strongly my emotions would affect him-"

"It would have been no different if I'd bonded with him." Anders closed his mouth, staring at her, one eyebrow raised.

"Cassandra, aside from that incident on the Coast, you are one of the most stable, neutral, and kind people I have ever met. You would never let your anger-"

"I have once before," she interrupted again, shaking her head. "And it would have been twice, but the first time I had no magick because the Templars drained me before I could react. Alistair had been hurt trying to defend me, and I wasn't about to let the smarmy bastard get away with it."  
>"What was the next time?" he asked softly, trying to figure it out on his own<p>

"The second time was back in Amaranthine, when Rylock laid that trap for you." Anders' grimaced, fists clenching.

"I'm glad the darkspawn got her. Even being a Templar, at least she died fighting for the city of Amaranthine."

"She didn't." Cassandra's voice was so low that he had to strain to hear it, and he slid closer to her. "I've never told anyone this: Rylock didn't die "in service to Amaranthine." She didn't desert, or run off somewhere with a mage. I was waiting for her when she left the Chantry that night after being released from the guards. She told me that she still considered you dangerous, and I couldn't take it any more. I killed her in the same way I tried to kill Hawke and her friends." His eyes were wide as he stared at her, jaw falling open. She had… Killed a Templar to protect him?

"Cassie…" She kissed him suddenly, wrapping her arms around his back and making him lose his balance, ending up lying in her lap.

"I do not regret my decision," she told him. "I cannot regret anything that I do anymore. That is why I need to really figure out how to proceed before the war hits."

"Why don't you sleep on it?" he suggested, pushing himself up and back towards the head of the bed. "Things will seem clearer tomorrow." She nodded, pulling the covers over the two of them and snuggling into his chest. "Goodnight, my love."

"I love you too," she whispered.

* * *

><p>A few days later, Cassandra was holding a meeting with her companions, outlining the idea and plans she had come up with. "All right, so we can all agree that Soldier's Peak would be the best place, yes?"<p>

"Well, Mistress Woolsey did say you were allowed sole access and ownership of it," Nathaniel remembered. "So even though the Wardens know about it, I doubt they'll trek all the way out to bother you."

"And those tunnels get you all turned around," Oghren pointed out. "Even with my Stone sense, I felt like I was going in circles following that Dryden guy."

"Are you sure one merchant family will be enough?" Isabella wondered. "You're expecting quite a crowd there, after all."

"Not in the long run, no. So I'm going to need some of you to search for a couple of folks who might be interested in coming to the Peak."

"Oh? This should be interesting to hear," Zevran said with a chuckle. "Most of the merchants we've met over the years are only interested in coin."

"I know," Cassandra said with a sigh. "But two of the people I'm hoping will come are in the Free Marches right now. Which means that whoever goes will need to be careful. Any volunteers?"

"Who are we hoping to retrieve?" Nathaniel asked, looking at her with his arms crossed over his chest.

"A Dwarf named Bodahn Feddic, and his son Sandal."

"Oh, I remember those two! Hawke let them live at her estate after the Deep Roads expedition. They were so nice," Merrill told the others.

"I'd almost forgotten about them," Anders added. "Sandal seemed a bit odd to me, talking about enchantments and the like."

"That's why I want him with us. Sandal is better than the Tranquil at making enchantments, and I'd rather see him safe and able to use his talents. And Bodahn can always help Levy keep us stocked with supplies."

"I could go talk to them," Oghren offered. "Just need a ship to get me there."

"Well, I've got one you can borrow," Isabella said with a grin. "Just, no touching anything this time. Or you might lose one of your drinking hands."

"Does this mean I shall be going as well?"

"Does the Elf have to come, Commander?"

"Oghren, that's up to the Captain, not me." Isabella leaned to the side and dropped her hand below the table, laughing as Zevran caught her hand and smiled.

"My dear Isabella, you have such naughty hands; Always roaming where you least expect it. Whatever shall I do about them?"

"Save it for the bedroom," Alistair said with a sigh. The assassin raised an eyebrow at the King.

"Does this mean we are excused from the meeting, your Highness?"

"Could you wait five more minutes, Zevran?"

"For you, my dear Hero, I would wait six minutes." Cassandra shook her head, smiling slightly. Most everyone else just groaned.

"Bodahn will be the only other merchant I want there, but there are two others who might look at this as an opportunity."

"And these others are?" the archer wondered.

"Do you remember Master Wade and his friend Herron?" Nathaniel, Anders, and Oghren all started laughing, and she put her hands on her hips, frowning.

"His **friend**? Cassie, you are too funny sometimes," the healer finally said.

"What did Wade call the Vigil? Turnip Keep, I believe?" Nathaniel asked with a hint of amusement. "You think he'd want to trek all the way into the mountains?"

"Forget the mountains, do you really want to deal with all that whining he does?"

"She dealt with you well enough, Oghren," Anders teased.

"Still a sodding comedian," the Dwarf said, crossing his arms.

"Be that as it may, why do you want a smith at the Peak? You already have Levi's brother there, and he's very good," Alistair pointed out.

"Wade is a master smith, and the things he can create are second-to-none, as far as I'm concerned. I intend to be teaching the arts of the arcane warrior, and the students are going to need solid weapons and armor. I want him equipping my students."

"Well, he is back in Denerim, so it shouldn't be hard to find him."

"Thank you, Alistair. Now then, for the long-term assignments, I would like all of you to just live your lives as you were. However, if you happen to find mages in your travels, bring them to the Peak as soon as possible. Once they're with us, we can figure out where they can stay or go to in the long run. Nathaniel, if any of our people wish to become Wardens, I'm going to send them to you at Vigil's Keep."

"Thank you, Commander. I'll make sure they receive proper training."

"Not to rain on your parade, sweet thing," Isabella began. "But what about the Templars? What if some of them want to help mages as well?" Both Cassandra and Anders shuddered, and Merrill looked at her lap.

"She's got a point, Cassie," Alistair brought up. "Not every Templar agrees with how the mages are treated. I know you don't trust them, but you are going to need warriors to help you if the Peak is attacked."

"What, I can't just have you there at all times?" she teased.

"Would that I could, my Lady, but I still have a kingdom to run."

"It might not be such a bad idea," the Dalish girl brought up. "But we'd have to make sure they really were on our side first."

"We'll talk about it when the time comes," Cassandra said with a nod. "For now, we need to get to the Tower and get everyone who wishes to go out of there."

"You're really going to march over there with soldiers and… Requisition the mages?" Zevran wondered.

"Damn right we are," Anders said. "By order of the King, no less."

"How did I let you talk me into that again?"

"Because I'm just that good?" Cassandra asked, winking at him. She looked around the table, smiling at the group she'd collected. "Everyone has their orders. You are dismissed until further notice." The group stood up and went their separate ways. Alistair came up to her, concern on his face.

"Can I talk to you for a moment?" She immediately had a bad feeling about whatever it was, but followed him into another room.

"What's wrong?" she asked, closing the door behind her.

"So you're leaving soon? For the Tower, and then Soldier's Peak?"

"Yes, I want to get everyone settled in before Thedas erupts into war. Right now there have only been rumors about what happened in Kirkwall, but it won't be long until the truth is known." He started pacing, and Cassandra felt her heartbeat increase. Pacing wasn't something Alistair usually did, and it was a clear sign that he was annoyed about something. "Alistair-"

"I'm going to lose you again," he said suddenly, turning around. "I had you all those years, and now you'll be miles away up some mountain."

"You're not losing me," she argued gently, walking over to him. "But this is something that needs to be done. I have to be there for my people, just as you need to be here for Ferelden."

"I wish you'd never made me King." He gripped her arms tight enough that she winced, and he let go, running a hand through his hair. "I wish I'd just stayed in the Wardens and been with you."

"Alistair… Are you jealous?" She quirked an eyebrow at him.

"What, no! I mean…" He sighed heavily, and then nodded.

"Of what or who?" She had her hands on her hips now, staring at him.

"Who else? I thought I would be okay with this, but… I guess I'm not the better man, if I can't understand how you feel."

"But you do understand," she countered, smiling now. "You understand better than I ever hoped you would. Honestly, I expected you to be more hurt than this."

"You did?" Cassandra wrapped her arms around his waist, burying her head in his chest for a moment as she listened to his heartbeat.

"You were the only love in my life for quite a long time, my King. And even when I wanted to help Anders, you were the first one to want to come with me. Whatever your reasons were, you knew that I was trying to save another man. And that he would be vying for my affection and attention just as much as you. That took great courage to face, and I love you more for it. And don't think that you're the only one feeling this way. I'm sure Anders is bothered by the fact that he wasn't around all this time, and that you've been my sole lover."

"Still, I've gotten used to you being here, Cassie. And Caden's going to miss having his "aunt" around."

"Then come visit," she offered. "And bring the little Prince. Have him get to know the children we'll be teaching and sheltering. If he grows up with them, and sees that magick isn't something to be feared, then maybe other countries will as well. Change always needs to start somewhere."

"That's not a bad idea. Anora won't like it, but when have I ever listened to her?" They laughed, and Alistair bent to kiss her, still smiling. "I'll visit as often as I can," he vowed. "Maybe I can be little Deborah's "uncle" as well."

"I'd like that. We're all going to be one big, happy family." She kissed him again, knowing that she was going to miss Alistair as much as he would miss her. "I'll look forward to your visits. I love you."

"I love you too."


	11. Class in in Session

Chapter 11: Class is in Session

Knight Commander Greagoir stared at the group that was milling about outside the Tower: Denerim soldiers led by a group of mages. What in the Maker's name was going on? He strode out the doors, some of the Templars following him. "What business brings you- Oh, it's you, Warden." Cassandra smirked at him, one hand on her hip. His tone told her all she needed to know, and for some reason, making Greagoir annoyed brought a smile to her face.

"Nice to see you too, Knight Commander." She walked over, handing him a scroll. "I bring greetings from our King, and a message." He unfurled the scroll, but barely got through half of it before turning angry eyes on her.

"What sort of nonsense is this? You cannot just order me to give all the mages in the Tower to you!"

"If you read more carefully, Greagoir, you'll see that it says only those willing to come with us. So you might have two or three left," Anders said with a grin.

"Don't get cheeky with me, boy. Chantry Law specifically states-"

"To the Void with "Chantry Law"!" Cassandra shouted, making the Templars jump a bit. Even Greagoir seemed a bit uneasy at that outburst. "This is not a request, Knight Commander, it is an order. I **will** be taking whoever wishes to come with me, and you will never have to worry about them again."

"I must send Templars to accompany them." He was going to make this difficult, and she rubbed her temples for a moment, trying to calm down. She had not wanted to resort to drastic measures, but they were both too stubborn on this issue.

"No, you don't. Here, I'll make this easier on you: By Rite of Conscription of the Grey Wardens, which I still retain, the entirety of the Circle Tower is now under my full jurisdiction." His jaw nearly dropped to the ground.

"You **cannot-**"

"I just did." Her eyes darkened, and she saw that a few of his fellows had their hands on their blades. Beside her, she felt Anders stiffen, and she saw the look his own eyes held: If they came closer, he might attack them. Merrill came up behind her, eyes wide. If she didn't put a reign on her emotions, things would quickly get out of hand."Call off your subordinates. I don't want bloodshed."

"All of you, stand down!" Greagoir chastised them, turning around. "I'll not see this place turn into Kirkwall." That caught her attention, and she raised an eyebrow.

"What do you know of Kirkwall?" He sighed heavily, shaking his head.

"I know that the Circle there was brutally executed for a crime it did not commit. Some insane blood mage took out the Chantry there, and Knight Commander Meredith ordered the Rite of Annullment. We took in the few survivors who managed to escape, and they told us what happened: How the Champion was also forced to kill Meredith when she was deemed to be insane due to direct lyrium exposure."

"Hawke did **what**?" Anders asked in shock. Merrill had her hands over her mouth, eyes wide. Never had any of them thought it would turn out that way.

"Knight Commander, let me take this burden from you," Cassandra implored. "I don't care if you villify me, but I am not leaving here without my fellow mages. As that scroll states, only those willing to come will leave. I doubt many of the older mages are going to like what I'm doing, but I'm sure there is enough tension with the younger ones to warrant the Templars being a bit… On edge?"

"That is an understatement," he said, sighing again. "Look Hero, you and I go back quite a ways. You were always the quiet rebel, but you are no fool. Whatever your idea is, I know that you will not endanger either Thedas or your fellow mages. You have until nightfall to get those who wish to leave out. After that, I am closing off access to the Tower while we await word from the Divine." She bowed, a small smile on her lips.

"By nightfall, we won't be anywhere near here. Maker watch over you, Knight Commander Greagoir. I'd say this makes us even for me helping during the Blight."

"Andraste guide you, Hero. I hope you know what you're doing." Greagoir and Cassandra bowed to each other, and then the Templars allowed them access to the Tower. Anders took her hand as they stepped inside, and she felt his hesitation just as she knew he felt hers. They were just visiting, not staying. In a few hours, they would leave this place forever, and it could burn for all she cared.

* * *

><p>"So it was you that told the Knight Commander about what happened in Kirkwall?" Merrill asked the young man sitting in the wagon. He sighed and nodded, his eyes flicking to Anders and Cassandra, who were riding horses next to them. It was nearly nightfall, and the Hero wanted to put some distance between their group and the Tower. It had turned that out most every mage <strong>had<strong> come with them, leaving only the very senior Senior Enchanters and the First Enchanter still with the Templars. Richard and Connor were currently regaling the children with stories from their time in the Tower, and the young mages from Kirkwall were fitting right in with them. Merrill was riding with their friends, all of whom had passed their Harrowing.

"I told them what I thought would be a believable story," the Starkhaven mage said, gazing out across the fields.

"You don't have to apologize, Alain," Anders told him with a small smile. "I'm just glad more of you got out."

"I'm the only one from my Circle left," he said sadly. "I'm just tired of running."

"You won't have to run anymore."

"Thank you, Ser-"

"No titles," the healer interrupted. "We're all equals here."

"Speak for yourself," Cassandra teased.

"Are you really the Hero of Ferelden?" She looked at him with confusion on her face, not quite sure what he meant.

"Were you expecting someone else? A man, perhaps? Or someone more imposing?" She heard giggling, and turned to look at Petra and Neria.

"Cassandra, you already are a bit imposing," the Elf said with a grin.

"And I don't think the stories would be half as fun if you were a man," Petra added. She was currently holding Deborah, who was asleep in her lap. Both girls had been instantly taken with the child, and had given her knowing grins when they'd seen Anders. He'd had the decency to blush when all three of them had looked his way.

"I meant no offense!" Alain hastily replied. "I just… I know you and the Champion are related-"

"Don't compare me to her," Cassandra said, shaking her head. "We're both mages, but our views couldn't be more opposite. I saved Ferelden because I had to, because it was the right thing to do. She was imprisoning mages because she was terrified of her own abilities."

"If she was so afraid, why didn't she join the Circle on her own?" Finn asked, looking up from his book. He'd managed to sneak quite a few volumes out of the library, mostly from the history section. Merrill had found him to be a kindred spirit.

"Who knows?" Anders said with a shrug. He shifted on the saddle, being careful of Pounce sitting on it. The cat was perched quite contentedly, staring at everything and probably reminiscing about the old days when he actually did get to see the world. On the mage's shoulders, Duchess and Squire Purrington peeked out from the feathers on his coat. He chuckled, tapping the orange kitten on his nose when he leaned forward, receiving a soft mewl in response. Lady Priss was over on Cassandra's saddle, her tail waving this way and that as she kept her eyes on her babies and her mistress. After a little while, Cassandra called a halt and for camp to be set up. She took her "daughter" from Petra, and the now-awake little girl hugged her tight, a smile lighting up her face.

"Were you a good girl for my friends, little one?"

"Uh-huh," she replied, waving to the other mages. "Food?"

"Soon, I promise. Why don't we go for a walk and stretch those little legs of yours?" Deborah grinned as she was set on the ground, teetering this way and that as she walked in the growing darkness. They'd pegged her age at around two, and she seemed like a normal child in every sense of the word. Only time would tell if she manifested magick, and Cassandra silently hoped that she did. Anders fell into step beside her, having placed the kittens in one of the empty wagons. He extended a hand to Deborah, and she latched onto it, her free one grabbing Cassandra's hand, linking them.

"I didn't think Greagoir would be so easy to convince," Anders said after a few minutes. They stood watching the sunset, and he gazed at his "family" in adoration.

"Me neither," Cassandra admitted, tucking her hair behind her ears as the wind picked up. "But he did owe me from the Blight."

"Word is already spreading. I wonder what the other Circles are going to do when they find out what happened?"

"Other than rise up and set the Chantry on its collective ass? I'm not sure. We might need to send people as backup if things get out of hand."

"You know I'll be the first to volunteer if it means giving these Templars a good thrashing." He shook his head, free hand clenching into a fist. Deborah suddenly let go of Cassandra's hand and clung to his pants, and Anders looked down at her.

"Sad?" she asked softly, tugging on the fabric. He bent down and lifted her up, tilting his head in curiousity.

"I'm not sad, little one. I'm-" He meant to say "angry", but stopped when he realized something. Thinking about the Templars had made him think of Justice, and the fact that the Spirit might still be out there, fighting against opression. He was fighting alone, after they'd sworn to free all mages from Chantry rule together. That **had** made him sad. "Maybe I am. Did I upset you?" Deborah shook her head, her arms wrapping around his neck as much as she could.

"No," she whispered, resting her head on his shoulder. Anders held her for a moment as Cassandra watched, her own interest piqued. Deborah finally lifted her head up and smiled brightly at the two of them. "Food?"

"Dinner should be ready soon. Let's head back and see what it is," Cassandra said as the little girl wiggled down to the ground and took off as fast as her little legs could go. The two mages followed closely after, but she tugged on his coat. "What's wrong?"

"I don't want to jump to conclusions, but I think she might be a mage." Cassandra's eyes widened for a moment as she met his gaze.

"It's awfully early for abilities to manifest, isn't it?" Not that it would be a problem, with all the mages that were going to be around the little girl from here on. Still, to have a confirmed magical ability at her age was rare. Anders shrugged and nodded.

"I was a late bloomer with magick though, so I'm not one to question. I've heard of children as young as three or four showing signs, but nothing that could single them out as mages. There were quite a few children in the Kirkwall Circle though."

"My younger brother was confirmed at five, which was far earlier than me or our older brother. What did she do that makes you think that?"

"It's not what she did, it's what she said. Originally, I was annoyed at the thought of Templars taking control of the other Circles, but that made me think of how I got started with all this."

"Justice," she guessed.

"Yes. And that led me to think about where he might be now, and if he's still fighting for our freedom. It bothers me that I'm not with him-" He saw the frightened look in her eyes, and immediately took her hand. "But I know that this is for the best. Still, it made me a little sad to think that the one who convinced me to stand up for our people isn't here. I think Deborah picked up on that." It took Cassandra a moment to get the meaning of his words, and her eyes widened.

"You think she's empathic?" They both looked towards the little blonde as she toddled straight into Finn, who didn't look away from his book. Merrill picked the little girl up and giggled at the bookish mage, a blush tinting her cheeks that was evident even in the dim light.

"Time will tell," Anders replied as they rejoined the group.

* * *

><p>Soldier's Peak loomed over the group as they exited the caverns, and those who had not been there before felt overwhelmed by the fortress. "You know, I never realized how… Big it was," Anders said, his mouth hanging slightly open. Cassandra grinned and turned to face the mages, who stood huddled at the mouth of the tunnels. She'd had to take her time remembering the way, but now they were all safely through.<p>

"Welcome to Soldier's Peak, everyone!" she called out. "What was once a Grey Warden base for training shall become our new home. For now, let's get everyone settled in the old barracks, and then I want to meet with all the Enchanters in the main hall. As for you kids, you are to mind those in charge of you, and the Dryden family. This has been their home for quite a while, and you will give them the respect they deserve. Are we clear?" All of the young apprentices nodded, and she smiled brightly. "Then let's get to it." Having had to leave the wagons at the entrance to the tunnels, getting everyone's gear and the other essentials they'd brought with them took quite a while. The Denerim soldiers who'd accompanied them stayed to help, and were offered lodging and food for the night, before they headed back to the city. When all was said and done, the older mages assembled in the hall that had once held great warriors and leaders from times long past. And even after all this time, Cassandra could still sense the Veil close by. With everything that had been done here over the years, it would probably never be as strong as it once was, even after Avernus had repaired it to keep the Demons away. All eyes were on her, and she stepped into the circle of her fellows. "Everyone here?"

"All present and accounted for," Petra told her with a smile.

"Good. This is where things start to sound weird. I know that none of you were expecting to ever see me again, let alone show up and escort you all from the Tower. So we'll start with the simple explanation: We're all free now. Free from not only the Tower, but the Circle itself and the Templars who enforce its archaic Laws. Now we will be able to live our lives as regular people, not as prisoners. This fortress will become a school and place of refuge for mages across Thedas, in the hopes that one day the world will see us as people who need not be feared. For those that wish to stay and help train the apprentices, I welcome your aid. And if anyone wishes to simply go out on their own and see the world, I wish you luck and the Maker's blessings. Just know that this place will always be here if you need it. Now then, does anyone have any questions?"

"Just one," Neria offered. "What about our phylacteries? The Templars can still hunt us down with them, so what's to stop them from coming here?" Cassandra grinned at her friend, pointing with a flourish at a number of locked chests that rested against the wall. She's personally checked and sorted their contents at the Tower.

"You mean those phylacteries?" she asked with a shrug. Everyone's eyes widened, and her grin got bigger. "Anyone who came with us, from the newest apprentice to the most seasoned Enchanter, your phylactery is now here. Tomorrow, when we officially get everyone settled down and start everything up, we're going to send a clear message that we are not going to be controlled any longer."

"We're going to smash them?" Richard called out, sounding a little giddy.

"That's **exactly** what we're going to do. They are the last ties we have to the old way of doing things. Now we will have no phylacteries, no Templars, no Harrowing, and no fear of being made Tranquil. The children we have will learn to harness their abilities and not fear them, and they will learn the dangers of the Fade without fretting over being possessed or killed. But it is we who must teach them this. And so I will only ask that you swear to one thing: There shall be no blood magick taught, practiced, or even considered on these grounds. Any who are found to be a blood mage will be exiled from Soldier's Peak, and may Andraste protect you from whatever will be out there looking for you." Nods passed among the adults, and even Merrill was fine with the vow. However, Alain tentatively raised his hand, and all talking stopped.

"My apologies, Hero, but.. I… I am a blood mage. I was taught by my mentor from the Starkhaven Circle. She said it would protect me, and I believed her. But I don't want to endanger anyone here, so if you will just allow me to rest for the night-" Cassandra walked over to him, even as some of the other mages backed away. Most of them had been with the Circle during Uldred's attempted takeover, and their fear and revulsion to blood magick was strong.

"Do you truly want to give up that power?" she asked, voice soft. He appeared startled by her question, but nodded vigrously.

"I do! I mean, I would if I could, but-"

"You can," Merrill told him. "We just need to find the Spirit-"

"Demon," Anders interrupted.

"**Spirit**," the Dalish girl continued, glaring as best as she could at the healer. "That you bound yourself to and… Destroy it."

"You make that sound so easy," Alain argued.

"I've killed quite a few Demons in my time," Cassandra told him. "But we'll need to head into the Fade and attack it there. Tomorrow, after we're all done with setting up the Peak, I'll take volunteers and go with you. With any luck, we'll have you free by dinnertime." She placed a hand on his shoulder, and the young man smiled.

"Thank you. I'm glad I came with you."

"You're a fellow mage," Neria said as she came over as well. "We don't abandon anyone, even if they made some foolish choices." The hurt in her voice betrayed an old pain, and Cassandra hugged her for a moment. Blood magick had exacted a price on the Elf that she hadn't expected to pay, and it wasn't even her who had turned to it.

_'Jowan, if I ever find you again, we're going to have a serious talk. Followed by a serious thrashing for you hurting Neria like that.'_

* * *

><p>That night, after everyone was settled, Cassandra looked around her new quarters. Levi had insisted she take the Warden Commander's room. There was even a small secondary room attached to it, and that was now Deborah's room until she got a bit older. None of the Drydens had gone near this section, out of respect for Sophia's memory, but now the time had come for even Soldier's Peak to stop living in the past After Avernus' passing a few years back, his tower had been cleared and cleansed of all experiments, and Cassandra had taken his notes for herself, lest they fall into curious hands. Anders walked into the room, looking slightly bothered, and she went to him, running a hand down his arm. "Something wrong?"<p>

"I've just been helping the others pass out the phylacteries to everyone. With the exception of the Kirkwall mages, almost everyone's is there. And Alain said that Orsino destroyed their storage room at the Gallows before he died."

"You said almost everyone's," she said, looking perplexed. "Who's is missing?"

"Yours and mine." He went to stand by the window, one hand reaching down to pet Lady Priss, who was perched on the sill. Cassandra shook her head and smiled slightly. "The Wardens must still have ours."

"They don't," she told him with a shrug. "I made sure of that."

"Then where are they, Cassie? If they weren't at the Tower, and they weren't sent to Weisshaupt, where could they be? This is bad, don't you see? We can be hunted still, and with you running this place, it won't be long before Templars show up." He turned around, beginning to pace, and she grabbed his coat, stopping him.

"Calm down," she ordered gently, meeting his gaze.

"Calm down? This is what got me into trouble the first time with you, remember? When Rylock set that damned trap, and we-" She pressed a finger to his lips, eyes narrowing.

"Don't bother even thinking about that wretched woman. She paid for her stupidity, remember?" He nodded, and she relaxed into him for a moment. "Besides, I know exactly where our phylacteries are. I was going to surprise you tomorrow, but I can see that you need proof now." She reached beneath her robe, pulling out the chain with her Joining pendant, and showing him the two vials that hung from either side of it. His eyes widened as he reached a tentative hand out to one of them, and she nodded. "Do you remember my Orlesian friend I told you about? The bard who told her the Maker wanted her to help us?"

"Lelianna, yes," he replied, still staring at the vials.

"She got them for me, and she's been keeping me informed of things that are going on not only with Orlais, but also the Divine as well. Lelianna has become the unseeen hand of Divine Justinia, but she knows me well enough to give me warning, should I wish to do something about situations she is called to investigate."

"Kirkwall." She nodded, pulling his phylactery off the chain and handing it to him. Anders pulled a cord up from around his neck, and she realized that he had kept his Joining pendant as well.

"Why did you keep this?" she wondered, fingers gently caressing the pendant after he added the phylactery to the cord. He smiled, bringing his hands up to rest on her waist. It felt like a weight had been lifted off him, and it was a wonderful feeling.

"Because it was the first thing you ever gave me, and it reminded me that there was still some good left in the Wardens. Sure, they made me give up Ser-Pounce-a-Lot, stuck me with a paranoid Templar, and made me trek into the blighted Deep Roads time and again, but… You made my first year bearable. With you leading us, I **wanted** to be a Warden. I just kept praying there would never be another Blight in my lifetime. Hearing the dreams of an archdemon is bad enough, but I can't imagine having to actually **know** that it's awake and aware of you."

"You get used to it," she said with a shrug.

"You're a poor liar, Cassie," he shot back, pulling her close. "You would wake up from nightmares every so often at the Vigil, and I would hear you whispering about darkspawn and the like. The Architect's presence just made it worse." She shivered a bit in his arms, knowing that he spoke the truth.

"Well, we don't have to worry about things like that any longer. The most "Grey Warden business" we'll be dealing with will be hosting any of our friends if they visit. And I for one will be glad to return to being a plain, ordinary mage."

"Cassandra Amell, there is nothing plain or ordinary about you," he teased.

"That may be true," she said with a shrug. "But I can certainly pretend. I've been the "Hero" for too long. Someone else can have that title, for all I care."

"You'd miss it and you know it. You love attention," he reminded her, nuzzling her neck. She grinned and guided him back to the bed, and they fell into it, laughing.

"We have our work cut out for us. Freeing other mages and teaching the children here is going to be interesting."

"I think it'll be fun," he predicted, kicking off his boots. "This is only the start, you realize that? It's going to take Thedas quite a while to change."

"And I fully intend to be here when it does." He kissed her hand, eyes lighting up.

"Here's to a world free of oppression and injustice, and a time when mages will not be feared." She hugged him tight and smiled.

"To freedom."


	12. Old Friends

All right, I'm going to need some help for the next chapter. Jowan makes a return, but I have two scenarios that might occur. The question is: Should Jowan be redeemed, or betray the others? Thanks!

Chapter 12: Old Friends

Almost a year had passed since they'd come to Soldier's Peak, and things were running rather smoothly, given the circumstances: Only a week after they'd arrived, word had officially come from Kirkwall about what had happened there. The Divine immediately sent soldiers, but Viscount Hawke and Prince Sebastian quickly got the situation under control. They jointly ruled Kirkwall and Starkhaven now, and had even officially married. Meanwhile, Circles all over Thedas had risen up at the outrage that had befallen their brethren, and tensions soon turned into full-scale fighting. Cassandra organized groups of her fellows to go out and render assistance to whoever needed it, and they'd managed to acquire quite a collection at the Peak. Along with Bodahn, Sandal, Wade, and Herron, she'd managed to contact a few other groups to help them. The Hooded Couriers, Mages' Collective, and Blackstone Irregulars now also ferried letters, goods, and people to and from the school. All in all, life was beginning to feel normal. She rolled over and stretched, feeling strong arms wrap around her waist from behind. "Good morning."

"Morning," Alistair mumbled, still not quite awake. She had suggested allowing Caden to bunk with the students, and the Prince looked forward to his visits when he got to be just a "normal" boy among his friends instead of Prince of Ferelden. That it also gave her some quality time with her lover was an added bonus. She reached out, her own arms tugging gently on the man in front of her. He rolled over with a groan, one eye cracking open as he mock-glared at her.

"It's too early," Anders protested, pulling the blankets over his head. She smiled at the two of them, laughing to herself.

"Mama?" a small voice called out. Cassandra sighed and wiggled out of the King's grasp, shimmying to the edge of the bed and heading for Deborah's room. She opened the door, smiling at the sleepy face that greeted her from the small bed.

"Well, someone's up early," she teased, lifting the child into her arms. Immediately, Duchess and Squire Purrington peeked up from the blankets, nestling further into them now that they didn't have to worry about the girl being there. "I might have known you two were the cause of this," she told the cats, shaking her head. Turning back to her room, both Deborah and Cassandra started laughing at the scene before them: Alistair was still curled up on his side of the bed, but his arms were stretched across her spot, his hands gripping the blankets that Anders was hiding beneath. Slowly, the mage was losing his covers, and just kept rolling to the other side, trying to wind the sheets tighter around him. His hair was hopelessly tousled, and kept falling into his face, but he paid it little mind. Setting the little girl on the bed, Cassandra watched as she crawled over to Anders, rocking him back and forth as hard as she could.

"Papa," she called. "Up!" He turned his head back, opening one eye again and giving her a quizzical look.

"Cats wake you up again?" he wondered, as she nodded and smiled. "I guess that means we all need to be up?"

"Well, classes will be starting in a little over an hour," Cassandra reminded him, beginning to get changed for the day. "And breakfast would be a good idea."

"Did someone mention food?" Alistair asked as he sat up, stretching. His eyes found Deborah, and he smiled. "What's this? Did Cassandra suddenly shrink? Who's this pretty little lady?"

"Uncle, is me! Deborah!" she replied, laughing. At the same time, Anders tossed the covers aside and lifted her into his arms, and she gave a delighted shriek as his stubble tickled her cheek. "Prickly!" Cassandra stood watching them, a sense of completion settling on her.

"Come on, everyone rise and shine! We've got a busy day ahead of us."

"Yes headmaster," the two men said in unison, rolling their eyes. She put her hands on her hips, lightning beginning to crackle around her.

"Everyone who isn't cute and blonde had better be up by the count of three." They all looked at one another, and she saw the grins that told her snarky comments were forthcoming from her boys.

"Last I checked, I wasn't a brunette," Anders quipped, tugging on his hair as he gathered it back and quickly tied it.

"You mean I'm not cute?" Alistair pouted, eyes wide.

"Mama loses!" Cassandra threw up her hands and sighed heavily.

"I'm outnumbered! My own child even turns against me." The smile never left her face though, and Deborah wiggled off the bed and stood next to her.

"Love you." She bent down and lifted the girl into her arms, kissing her forehead.

"I love you too. Now let's get you dressed and down for breakfast. Papa and Uncle Alistair can fend for themselves." They were out of bed, in clothes, and out the door before she even had Deborah's nightgown off, and she chuckled.

"Mama happy?"

"Mama is very happy, sweetie."

* * *

><p>It was later that day, and Cassandra was in the middle of teaching one of her advanced classes on shapeshifting, when Caden suddenly burst through the door, out of breath. "Aunt- I mean Headmaster! Master Levi requires your presence downstairs." She immediately got a bad feeling, and looked at her students.<p>

"All of you are dismissed for the day. Tell the other teachers that something is wrong, and meet me in the courtyard."

"Yes ma'am!" they chorused, racing out of the room. Cassandra smiled at her "nephew", who had regained his composure.

"Any extra details?"

"He just said that they found two people in the caves, trying to get to the Peak. One is unconscious, and the other…" Caden pursed his lips, not sure how to phrase what it was he'd seen outside. "The other says his body is not effected by the cold because it's dead." Her eyes widened, and fear stabbed straight through her.

"Where's Anders?"

"Father was getting him, to take a look at the unconscious man."

"Andraste's flaming knickers. Let's go!" She shifted quickly, the black cat leaping onto the boy's shoulder and hooking her claws into his cloak as he raced through the halls of the Peak. Once outside, she returned to her natural form and practically jumped over the stairs to the courtyard proper. There was a small crowd gathered, mostly younger apprentices and a few of the Drydens. Levi saw her and waved her over, and she spotted Anders and Alistair on approach as well. "Everyone who isn't an Enchanter, back to your rooms this instant!" Her voice thundered across the expanse, and the children all scattered. Levi's kin also hightailed it, leaving only the merchant, the three of them, the unconscious man, and…

"Justice?" Anders called out, tilting his head. The body turned, a smile causing the flesh around his mouth to pull oddly, showing more teeth and jawbone than was normal. She stepped in front of the Spirit, and his eyes shifted to her. He seemed to be in almost the same state as when he'd left Kristoff's body years ago, but the robes he wore hid most of the decay from view.

"I am sorry to intrude like this," Justice began. "I was bringing a fellow mage to this sanctuary, but the cold seems to have gotten the better of him." Anders dropped to one knee beside the man on the ground, quickly scanning him with his magick. Pulling back the scarf wrapped around the man's nose and mouth, theWarden suddenly shouted and stood up like he'd been bitten. Alistair had his sword drawn, but Cassandra waved him back, a flame already in her hands.

"Where did you find him?" the healer demanded, fists clenched at his side. The Spirit shrugged, meeting his gaze.

"He was wandering, and ran afoul of a group of Templars. I killed them, and we got to talking. He told me he'd heard of a place in the mountains where mages could go to find sanctuary, and we began asking around about it. A mercenary pointed us to the caves, but he collapsed before we could get through."

"I found them on my way back," Levi explained. "Figured we should bring the one in for healing, and this other… Well, I'm not sure what he is, but I thought you might." Cassandra nodded, inching closer to the Spirit and the mage on the ground.

"Do you have any idea what he is, Justice?" Anders fumed.

"He is a mage, like you."

"He is **nothing** like me!" Alistair put a hand on his shoulder, and Anders pulled back, beginning to pace. Now that he was out of the way, she could see what had spooked him, and her eyes darkened as she looked at Justice.

"He's a blood mage," she told the Spirit, who scoffed.

"How do you know?"

"Because I know him. He grew up with us in the Tower." She stared at the still form of Jowan, feeling the hurt and anger she'd experienced back then come crashing over her in a wave. "Get him to the infirmary. We'll deal with him later." She glared at Justice as Levi and Alistair picked up Jowan and headed off, Anders at their heels. "You and I have some things to discuss as well."

"Yes Commander," the Spirit replied, bowing his head slightly. "We did not end on friendly terms last time. I would like to rectify that."

"We'll see. Follow me, and don't wander off. The last thing I need is for you to scare these kids." She turned, seeing the other teachers gathering at the top of the stairs. "Emergency meeting in my office, now!" They all obeyed, following the Warden mage to more private quarters. This was going to be interesting.

* * *

><p>Jowan stirred, groaning softly as he came to. Everything hurt, and he was still freezing cold. He opened his eyes, expecting to see the caverns, but instead found himself staring at a ceiling. Trying to sit up, he found that he couldn't move his arms and legs, and looked down at his body. A blush colored his cheeks as he realized that he was naked from the waist up, and he was strapped down to the cot he was lying on. Movement in the corner of the room grabbed his attention, and a man stepped into his field of vision, arms crossed over his chest and a scowl on his face. Jowan stared at him, realizing the man looked familiar. Had he been part of the Circle, or maybe from Redcliffe? "You're awake," the man said flatly, coming to stand next to him.<p>

"Where am I?" he asked softly, trying to move his hands. "And why am I tied down?" The stranger tugged at his short ponytail, sighing in annoyance. A cat suddenly leapt down from a nearby shelf and landed on his shoulder, and he scratched the creature's head affectionately. That jogged a memory, and it was Jowan's turn to sigh. "Anders. Fancy meeting you here."

"I live here," the blonde mage shot back, eyes narrowing.

"Look, I can explain-"

"Save it," Anders said, turning away from him, the cat now in his arms. "I don't want to hear anything from you except when you'll be leaving. You'll need a day's rest to recover from the frostbite and exhaustion, but after that, you need to go." Jowan lifted his head, shaking it even though the gesture wouldn't be seen.

"You can't kick me out! I'm a fellow mage!"

"You're a **blood** mage. We don't tolerate your kind here. Especially after everything that you did during the Blight."

"You're one to talk! Always running away and getting dragged back by the Templars! Your antics made them watch us like hawks, you know. We could barely get out of bed without them wanting to know where we were going."

"They just needed to lock the doors better," he quipped, beginning to mix some healing potions. "Besides, you were still able to sneak out and meet your Chantry bitch."

"Don't you talk about Lily like that!" Jowan struggled against the bindings now, but Anders shook his head and ignored him. The cat sat on the table beside him, dark eyes watching the restrained mage like he was some sort of guard dog. "What's with the cat? He doesn't seem to trust me."

"Ser-Pounce-a-Lot doesn't trust you," Anders said without turning around. "None of us do."

"I never hurt any of you! All I did was attack Greagoir and his men when they went to take me and Lily."

"Irving was there too, remember? So were Neria and Cassandra." Jowan made a derisive sound, which made Anders turn to look at him.

"What, Amell? Some help she was. I thought she was going to defend-"

"You used blood magick! Cassandra would never willingly help someone who sold themselves for power. Letting you go at Redcliffe is something she still regrets."

"She let me go because they were going to execute-"

"Maker's breath, you poisoned the Arl of Redcliffe!" Anders stood up, anger clear on his face as the Pounce hissed softly. "You poorly taught his son about magick, and the boy almost became an abomination. It's only thanks to Cassandra and the Circle that he's a normal mage now." Jowan bit his lip and looked down for a moment.

"Is… Is Connor here?"

"He is, but you'll never see him. There's no point in bringing up painful memories. You're not worth it."

"You never liked me," the dark-haired mage said with a scowl. "I don't know why, either. You were better at magick, at healing, and the girls all seemed to love you. What did I ever do?"

"You chose the easy way out. I hate the Rite of Tranquility, but you would never have passed your Harrowing, 're too compliant, and the Demons would've tripped over themselves to get to you."

"I'm surprised they never made you Tranquil, what with all the escape attempts." Anders just shrugged and turned back to his work, laying a gentle hand on Pounce's back. The cat stopped hissing and rubbed his face against the mage's arm. "So…" Jowan said after a few minutes of silence. "You mentioned Cassandra and Neria. Anyone else here that I might know."

"A few people."

"What, you mean I can't see them before you throw me out of here? You know, that Spirit or whatever that came with me was wrong. I knew I'd never be accepted here."

"If Justice had known what you were, he would have killed you himself."

"You talk like you know him." Anders' fists clenched for a moment.

"I **do** know him. We were Wardens together."

"You joined the Wardens? That seems uncharacteristic of you."

"I was conscripted." Jowan closed his mouth for a moment, a smirk tugging at the corners as he stared at Anders.

"Oh, I see how this went. Cassandra conscripted you, didn't she? Was she that desperate for help that she wanted to risk having you around? I'm surprised you stayed."

"I don't have to justify myself to you, of all people."

"There had to be **some** reason you stayed," Jowan continued, grinning now. "What could it have been?" Anger caused Anders' magick to flare slightly, but he shook his head and got himself composed. Suddenly, the door to the room creaked open, and his eyes went wide as Deborah walked in, smiling when she saw him.

"Papa!" she called, running over.

"Andraste's knicker weasels!" he swore softly. "What are you doing here?" He lifted her into his arms, and could almost feel Jowan's smirk get bigger.

"What's this? She yours?" the blood mage wondered, lifting his head. Anders turned, scowling at him, but he felt Deborah cling tighter to him, and tried to relax.

"Yes, she's mine," he said flatly.

"Who's her mother?"

"None of your business."

"Why so defensive, Anders? You think I'm going to summon Demons to whisk her away when you're not looking? I would never hurt a child."

"Connor." Jowan frowned.

"I didn't hurt him. I just… You're right, I didn't properly teach him. But Lady Isolde was very particular about what I could show him. If anything, it was her faith that caused the issue."

"Don't try and blame this on others!" Anders set Deborah down and walked over to him, grabbing his bare arm and pressing down on a scar. "You still practice blood magick, and don't think I can't tell. Some of these scars are less than a month old."

"It's the damn Templars!" Jowan shot back. "When the Divine sent people to Kirkwall, all the Circles went insane. There are Templars in every town and village now, rooting out apostates and children with newly-awakened powers. I was just trying to protect myself."

"Liar!"

"Papa!" Deborah shouted, tugging on his pants. "Calm please? No angry?" Anders looked into her eyes, fighting with his emotions for her sake.

"Please just let me up?" the other man pleaded. "I won't do anything."

"You make one motion towards my daughter, and I will break the healer's oath and throw you out the nearest window." His voice was low and dangerous, and Jowan swallowed nervously as he saw the dark light in his eyes. Anders was very serious.

"I swear I won't touch her." As the healer undid the bonds on his arms, Jowan felt the little girl's eyes on him, like even she was assessing him. When he was free he sat up, smiling at the child. "Hello there. I'm Jowan."

"Deborah," she said softly, hiding behind Anders' leg.

"He's your father?" She nodded, blushing a little. "Who's your mother?" Deborah tilted her head, confusion on her face.

"Mama is mama," she replied. Anders started laughing, seeing the defeated look in Jowan's eyes.

"Nice try," he commended, scooping up the little blonde. "Someone will be around shortly to talk to you. Probably the headmaster."

"You left my legs bound." Anders paused at the door as Pounce followed him into the hall. The healer grinned, but it wasn't friendly.

"You're right. I did." Then the door shut, and Jowan was alone again.

* * *

><p>The mages crowded into the headmaster's office looked nervous as Cassandra paced back and forth, occasionally glancing at the walking corpse who stood against the wall, a calm look on his face. "So, you're the Spirit that was in Anders?" Merrill eventually asked, Finn's arms around her protectively.<p>

"I am Justice," he replied, nodding. "Anders offered himself as a host, and we were going to set all mages across Thedas free."

"With all due respect, Ser Justice," Alain spoke up. "That was not the best way to start." The Spirit folded his arms across his chest, dead eyes narrowing.

"And what better sign would you have sent that the opression needed to end?"

"Something that didn't involve forcing the Divine to declare a war on magick?" Richard offered with a shrug.

"What are you doing here, anyway?" Cassandra finally wondered. "You just randomly found Jowan being accosted on the road and he told you about this place?"

"That is an over-simplification of events, but yes. Jowan and I have traveled for many weeks together. I cannot believe that he is a blood mage."

"So was I," Merrill reminded him. "And you didn't know until I used the magick. Blood mages know to hide what we are."

"He does not have the same demeanor I am used to encountering with maleficars. But he said he wished for sanctuary, and I vowed to help him."

"He's not staying," Cassandra told him.

"But-" She turned to face her Elven friend.

"Neria, don't start. He lied to us! Jowan swore on the Maker and Andraste that he had only been sneaking out to see Lily. And when the Templars confronted him, he used blood magick and then ran like the entirety of the Fade was chasing him." Neria nodded, hugging her arms to herself.

"Because you helped him destroy his phylactery… At my urging."

"You wanted him to be happy," Petra intervened, putting an arm around her friend. "None of us had any idea what he was."

"What's done is done, but he's not staying with us," Cassandra again stated. "I won't have him potentially corrupt any of the children we have here. Merrill and Alain fought their Demons and won, and that's the only reason they remain."

"Thank the Maker for that, too," Finn said as he kissed the Dalish girl. She giggled, cheeks turning scarlet.

"What if Jowan fights the Demon he made a pact with?" Justice proposed, pushing away from the wall. "You say that others here have, so why can't he?"

"I don't trust him," she shot back. "He almost killed the Arl of Redcliffe during the Blight, and what he taught Connor was…" She turned to look at the boy in question, and he just shook his head, eyes darkening.

"Too much power, not enough control," he finished. "If it wasn't for you and First Enchanter Irving, I'd be an abomination still. Or dead."

"Commander, you cannot just turn your back on him."

"That's very funny coming from you, Justice," she replied, glaring at him. "Regardless of who first proposed that assanine merge, you allowed yourself to be overwhelmed with emotion. You let it rule you."

"I thought I could fight it back," he explained. "Anders did too."

"And instead, you two spent nearly ten years making a mess of things in Kirkwall." The Spirit frowned and shook his head.

"He had his clinic still, and the refugees needed him. I did not take him away from that. I merely insisted that he work harder to free his fellows."

"You almost killed him!" she shouted, hands balling into fists. Petra put a hand on her shoulder, but she shrugged it off. "You took him over and forced him to do things! For the Maker's sake Justice, you killed a girl he was trying to save."

"I am sorry for that," he said, lowering his head. "That almost destroyed Anders, even moreso than Karl's death."

"Yet you still kept going, still made him be the villain that the Chantry could point to and say "this is why mages must be caged". If anything, you made it worse."

"I thought you said you would have helped?"

"I said I would have gone along with most of your plan. The part about turning the Chantry into flaming bits of debris would not have happened had I been there."

"Then what would you have done, Commander?" He sounded exasperated, which was unlike the Spirit. Had he kept some of the emotions he'd picked up from Anders?

"I don't know," she told him. "I can stand here now and say "I might have this", or "I could have that", but it won't change what happened."

"But you have barricaded yourself in this fortress. You seem unaffected by what is going on out in the world."

"That's not true!" Richard said angrily. "We're protecting the younger mages here, and teaching them to control their powers. And Cassandra sends people out to help when she hears about a fight."

"She goes herself as well," Petra told the Spirit. "We aren't living like hermits up here. Soldier's Peak is a refuge and sanctuary, and we will defend it."

"Anders feels the same way?" Cassandra tilted her head, wondering why he asked the question that way.

"Yes, he does. Why?"

"Maybe he will allow me to-"

"**No**." Everyone stared at her, and she walked up to the Spirit, eyes narrowed. "Whatever you were about to say is unimportant. You are not staying, you are not helping, and you are not going anywhere near him."

"You have fear in your voice, Commander. What do you think I will do to him?"

"I don't want to find out. Look Justice, I appreciate whatever help you've given to mages since you got your own body again. I still respect you from when we traveled together in Amaranthine. But make no mistake: If you even **think** about asking Anders to merge with you again, I will drop you where you stand and send you screaming back into the Fade. He has a new life, and a family now." He had a puzzled look on his face.

"You have had a child, Commander?" She blushed in spite of herself and shook her head. "Then what-"

"We took in a little girl from Kirkwall whose mother was a mage. She was killed, but I couldn't let a child that young be without parents. Deborah sees us as her mother and father now."

"And that is enough for him to stay?" Cassandra was taken aback by the question, but thankfully the door opened, saving her from answering it. However, Anders entered the room, holding Deborah in his arms. Alistair was right behind him.

"Well, this looks like a pretty packed party already," the King teased.

"Mama!" She took the little girl, holding her tight.

"Everyone else, out," she ordered.

"Sis, are you sure?" She nodded, trying to fight back tears.

"Please go. I'll see you all later." The other mages left the room, leaving only the three Wardens, Justice, and Deborah. The child stared at the Spirit, eyes wide.

"What are you?" she asked, reaching out. Immediately, both Anders and Cassandra grabbed her outstretched hand, and she whimpered. "Sorry."

"I am Justice," he told her, bowing slightly. "I am a Spirit from the Fade: The place where you go when you dream."

"Cassie, do you want me to take her?" Alistair offered, seeing the pained expression on the mage's face. She shook her head, almost afraid to talk. "I'll be right outside if you need me, then." The warrior closed the door behind him, and silence descended on the room. Finally, Anders sighed heavily.

"So Justice, what have you been up to recently?"

"I have been traveling across Thedas, helping any mages I can stay one step ahead of the Templars and Chantry. Most seem grateful, and are willing to overlook the condition of this body."

"It's good that there's someone else helping the other mages." Justice raised his eyes to meet Anders', shaking his head.

"You should be out there too, my friend. Isn't that what you wanted?"

"I…" He looked over at Cassandra, who was staring at him, tears in her eyes. Deborah had her arms around her neck, and she was whispering something he couldn't quite hear. "As much as I want to fight the Templars directly, I'm needed here more."

"I thought you favored and wished for a more direct approach?"

"Justice, look around you: There are young mages here who need my help; my guidance to find their own way. This is what I wished the Circle was, and I'm helping create that for the next generation."

"You should be worried about-"

"Stop!" Both the adults stared wide-eyed at the little girl, and Justice closed his mouth as well. Deborah wiggled herself down to the floor, hands on her hips. "You make Mama sad! You make Papa grumpy! They stay here with me!" She turned and threw her small arms as far around their legs as they would go, tears trailing down her cheeks. Both Anders and Cassandra dropped to their knees, embracing her tightly.

"Sh, sweetie, it's all right," Cassandra assured her.

"We're not going anywhere," Anders added, kissing the top of her head.

"The child knows your feelings?" Justice sounded both bothered and intrigued.

"Yes. We think she's a mage," the healer told the Spirit, not looking up.

"I am sorry for thinking you were not doing enough, my friend. It seems there was more here for you than I ever thought." Anders stood, Deborah in his arms as Cassandra pressed herself against his side, resting her head on his arm. "They need you here, just as I must be out there. But together, we will make a difference."

"Together?" Cassandra's voice sounded slightly annoyed, and she turned her head to look at Justice, who smiled as best as he could.

"I meant that in doing our parts seperately, we would see change come faster. Don't worry Commander, I believe you would carry out your threat, and I have no desire to test your resolve." Anders looked confused for a moment.

"Did I miss something?"

"I'll explain later. For now, I need to go talk to our other guest."

"I still think you should give him the opportunity to confront his Demon."

"Justice, you do know what will happen if he can't defeat it, right?"

"Yes Commander. Jowan will turn into an abomination, and you will have to kill him. Rest assured that if that were to happen, I would strike the blow myself. Anyone who submits to a Demon is not worthy to live." She nodded, satisfied for the moment.

"You may wander the grounds, Justice, but stay away from the children. That body is starting to fall apart, and we don't need them too scared to sleep."

"Yes Commander," he replied with a bow. She opened the door, and Alistair glanced up as they all walked out.

"Everything all right?" he wondered.

"For the moment," she told him. "I need to speak to Jowan. Want to come?"

"Oh sure, I always enjoy discussing betrayal and blood magick before dinner."

"I'll sit this one out," Anders said, giving her a quick kiss. "So I'll get Deborah fed and then ready for bed."

"Thank you. Come on, my King. We have a maleficarum to deal with." Alistair sighed and followed, having seen the dark look in her eyes. However, she took his hand and squeezed it, smiling up at him.

"Alistair, do you ever regret only having Caden?" He seemed surprised at her question, jaw hitting the floor for a moment.

"I… No, I don't. I love my son, Cassie. Sure, maybe I would have wanted more kids, but the Joining took care of that. I wouldn't trade him for all the babes in the world, though. What brought **that** up?"

"I guess I was just wondering if you ever wanted to have children with me…" He put an arm around her shoulders and pulled her tight against him for a moment.

"Cassandra, listen to me: I'm just glad to have you here beside me. We both knew that it would be next to impossible for you to conceive, and I came to terms with that long ago. Does it bother you, though? I know you love Deborah and all, but-"

"Only when someone brings it up," she admitted.

"Let me guess: The talking corpse?"

"Justice, yes. He asked a rather personal question, and I didn't know how to answer. I'll be all right though."

"You make a wonderful mother, Cassie. Especially because she's not yours."

"Thank you, love. Now then, did you want to look the part of the stoic, brooding warrior in the corner? Or will you try and counter my aggression with your charm?"

"I'm just tagging along, my dear. Short of killing him, he's all yours." She grinned; a wicked smile that sent shivers up his spine.

"Good. After that talk with Justice, it'll be nice to be able to let loose a little."

* * *

><p>Jowan was starting to get hungry, and wondered how long they intended to leave him stuck where he was. He'd tried to undo the bonds on his legs, but they required a key, and no amount of magick he tried was getting them to loosen. Suddenly, he heard the door open, and braced himself for another round with Anders. However, the two people who walked into the room were far worse than the healer: Cassandra Amell and Alistair Theirin, the King of Ferelden. His eyes bugged out of his head as his jaw hit his lap. "Seems we've been recognized," Cassandra said with a smirk, closing the door behind her. Alistair just nodded, standing against the wall with his arms folded.<p>

"What are you two doing here? I thought… Aren't you both Grey Wardens? And he's the bloody King!"

"This place belonged to the Order a long time ago," Cassandra told him. "But when we cleared it of Demons and helped seal the Veil tears, I was given full rights and access to it. Now it is a school and a sanctuary for mages."

"Then I did make it. Maker be praised, I'm safe!" Her eyebrow arched.

"Safe? Here? Jowan, you must be kidding me. There are at least four people who would like nothing more than to dangle you out the nearest window and watch you drop." He grimaced, shaking his head.

"Four? I only thought that idiot Anders-" She was next to him faster than he could blink, one hand on his wrist. Her eyes were dark and narrowed as he looked up at her, and Jowan failed to repress the shudder than ran through him.

"Don't you start the name-calling, **maleficar**. Why I thought you deserved freedom at Redcliffe, I'm still not sure. You got involved with a Chantry initiate, smashed your phylactery, attacked a bunch of us at the Circle and then ran, tried to kill a good man, and almost turned his son into an abomination."

"I wouldn't have needed to use blood magick if you had just defended me to Irving!" he shouted, hands clenched as he pulled out of her grasp. "You were his pet, Cassandra. But you thought I was guilty too, didn't you?"

"You **were** guilty! It was bad enough that I got you into the basement in the first place, but when you proved Greagoir right…" She paced back and forth for a moment. "You broke Neria's heart, you know that? She cared about you."

"Then why didn't she help me?"

"She got **me**. Seeing you and Lily together was too much for her to bear, but she still wanted you to be free and happy. It took Petra and Deborah over a week to get her to realize she wasn't to blame." She'd gotten the rest of the story from her friends on the trip to the Peak, as she'd been taken into the Wardens the very day of Jowan's betrayal.

"Oh, yes, those two. Are they here too? Anders mentioned that Neria was around, but no other names."

"Petra is a teacher here," she stated, hoping he didn't press the subject.

"And what about your lover? Surely you didn't leave her at the Tower?"

"Drop it," Alistair ordered, coming to stand next to her. "We're here to discuss what to do with you, Jowan. Though I must admit, that window option is looking mighty appealing right now."

"Tell us how you got here," Cassandra ordered.

"All right, all right! Maker's breath, I can't even wonder about my old friends." He laid back down, staring at the ceiling for a moment. "I was traveling around, trying to stay one step ahead of the Templars. Some of them have started to rebel against the Chantry, but most are still loyal. I wasn't fast enough getting out of a town one day, and three of them surrounded me. I thought I was done for, until what I thought was another mage attacked them. But I'd never seen spells or power like he wielded, and he killed all the Templars pretty quickly. We got to talking, and he said he was Justice, a Fade Spirit. I'm not sure if I believe him-" She waved her hand, and he paused.

"He told you the truth." He nodded, still not sure about what he'd seen.

"Oh… Anyway, I told him that I'd heard stories of a refuge in the mountains, where mages would be safe. We asked around, and finally a mercenary from the Blackstone Irregulars told us that the Hero of Ferelden had built a safe haven, but we would need help navigating the caverns leading to it. Justice thought we could do it on our own, but we ended up getting lost. And that's the last thing I remember before waking up to see Anders glaring at me."

"He doesn't like blood mages. We're all a bit wary since Uldred."

"I'd give it all up, if I could! If only I could slay the Demon I made my pact with." He sat up, hands pressed together in what looked like prayer. "Please Cassandra, I need your help! Once the Demon is dead, I'll be free, and you won't ever have to worry about me again. I'll even leave, if that's what you still want." She pursed her lips, glancing at Alistair, who shrugged.

"He sounds genuine to me," the warrior confessed as she sighed and nodded.

"Fine then. Tomorrow, we'll enter the Fade and help you kill your Demon. You'd better be ready for this, Jowan. Because Andraste as my witness, if you so much as stutter when we're there, I will cut you down without any hesitation."

"I… I won't fail. I swear it." Cassandra turned to go, but he cleared his throat, and she turned back to face him. "I just have one question."

"What is it?"

"There was a little girl who came here to find Anders. He said it was his daughter." Her eyes widened, but he didn't seem to notice. "I was just wondering who her mother was? Anyone I know?"

"I'll answer two questions in one, Jowan: Her name is Deborah, and that's to honor the memory of the love of my life." He pulled back, surprised. "Remember, tomorrow we'll get this taken care of. After that, you will leave the Peak and never come back. Are we clear?"

"Completely clear." She and Alistair left the room, and Cassandra rested her head on the nearest wall.

"Was that wise? Telling him about the baby?"

"It's not like he can do anything to her. By tomorrow, this will all be over. One way or another. Now let's go grab some dinner."

"Yes ma'am!" he said happily, taking her hand as they headed off.


	13. Fade Solution

Chapter 13: Fade Solution

Classes were canceled the next day, and rumors were soon flying as to why. Some of the children had seen Justice moving around the Peak's grounds, but all had stayed away from him. Levi only told his family that the Hero and the other mages had everything under control, and so the Drydens stayed away from the fortress itself. Inside, Cassandra was preparing the ritual that would carry them to the Fade. A pedestal similar to the one in the Harrowing Chamber stood at the far end of the room, and she very carefully poured the lyrium concoction into the bowl on the top. "I still don't like this," Anders told her.

"Neither do I. But if we just chased Jowan out of here, we'd be hypocrites. Freedom for mages means rescuing those who wish it from their Demons as well as the Templars." She sighed and looked at the others who were gathered in the chamber. "If I could get a volunteer from one of you?"

"I'll do it," Merrill said without hesitation. Finn started to say something, but Anders beat him to it.

"Merrill, that's thoughtful of you, but the risk is too great."

"Why? Because I used to be a blood mage?" Her eyes narrowed slightly.

"No, because you're with child." The Dalish mage blushed and put a hand over her slightly rounded stomach, looking up at Finn, who embraced her.

"For once, he has a point, lethallan," the human mage replied with a smirk. Anders rolled his eyes and turned away.

"I'll come," Neria said softly, stepping forward.

"Are you sure?" Cassandra asked her, concern on her face. The Elven mage nodded, looking at the floor for a moment before meeting her friend's gaze.

"I should have helped him years ago. Now I can correct that mistake." The door opened then, and Alistair walked in, escorting a very fearful Jowan. Justice and Caden were right behind him, the boy looking nervous as well.

"You don't have to be here," the King said. The Prince shrugged and nodded.

"I know Father, but I want to be. I need to see as much as I can to understand what it is that mages must face." Cassandra walked over to him, a smile on her face.

"You will be a wonderful ruler as long as you keep that in mind for all people, Caden," the told him, squeezing his shoulder. Then she turned to Jowan, motioning with her head at the pedestal. "We enter together, face your Demon, and then leave. But remember what I told you last night."

"I remember," he said tiredly. "If I so much as stutter, I'm dead."

"You'll be fine, Jowan," Neria told him. "I believe in you." His eyes widened for a moment as he swallowed the sudden lump in his throat.

"You- You're coming too?" She nodded.

"I'll be with you every step of the way. We'll help you beat this, I promise."

"Let's get this over with," Anders said, taking Cassandra's hand. Alistair moved in front of her, fear in his eyes.

"Be careful," he warned, brushing his lips against her cheek.

"I will be," she promised. The four mages stood around the pedestal, taking one final breath before reaching out to touch the liquid lyrium, and then falling into the Fade.

* * *

><p>Cassandra came to her senses quickly, seeing the familiar hazy, muted world of the Fade. How any of the Spirits here could actually enjoy this place, she would never know. Beside her, Anders and Neria picked themselves up, the Elf hugging her arms to her chest. Jowan stood slowly, shaking his head to clear it. "I hate this place," he whispered.<p>

"Then let's find the Demon quickly. What kind is it, anyway?" Cassandra asked him, starting to walk.

"Um… One of the Desire ones." The other mages all stopped and stared at him, and Jowan couldn't help but blush. "What?"

"What did it promise you, dare I ask?" Anders wondered, one eyebrow raised.

"None of your business!"

"It promised you a life with Lily, didn't it?" Neria's voice was soft, like she felt guilty for even thinking about it. Jowan stared at her, shock clear on his face as he just nodded. "Demons cannot grant love, Jowan. Everything they touch turns to ash."

"I know that now, Neria. I just… I wanted a life with her, away from the Circle. And Ardor promised me all those things if I swore myself to it."

"You're not the first one to be fooled Jowan, and you won't be the last. It's good that you realize your mistake, and now we're going to fix it." Cassandra nodded at the others, and they continued walking. They walked the seemingly endless paths, Jowan growing more and more restless as they continued. Finally, they came to a large clearing, where a Desire Demon sat on a throne, one clawed finger on her lips.

"It appears I have guests," it said, rising and floating over to them.

"Come no further!" Cassandra warned, flames dancing in her palms already.

"Such bravery for a mortal," the Demon crooned, smirking a bit. "I see you have brought Jowan with you. Do you also seek my aid?"

"We seek your death, nothing more!" Anders replied, a cold mist surrounding him. Neria had rock gaunlets on, glaring at the Demon. But Jowan stood there, eyes wide as Ardor shifted her gaze to him.

"You wish to betray me, Jowan? After everything I have done for you?"  
>"You did nothing for him except ruin his life!" Cassandra stepped forward, the fire in her hands slowly spreading up her arms. "Your lies twisted him; made him betray those that trusted him!"<p>

"Betray? My dear girl, I never forced Jowan to react as he did." Ardor appeared hurt by the words, gliding back a bit from the mages. "His actions were his own. I merely supplied the power he sought to achieve his goals."

"You promised that I would have Lily!" he shouted, lightning crackling between his hands. "But when she saw what I was… She wanted nothing to do with me!"

"You could have had her still, even after that," the Demon told him. "Had you but used your magick to convince her that she would be better off with you, she would have gladly followed you away from the Circle." Jowan's spell faltered as he closed his eyes, tears pressing hot against them.

"She would have come with me?"

"As your slave, nothing more!" Anders reminded him. "You honestly would have used your magick to poison her mind?"

"Shut up!" he screamed back, turning to face the healer. "You have no idea what it's like to be in love! I would have done anything for Lily; given her the world if she had asked. What would you know about that? You only care about yourself and your stupid attempts at freedom!" Cassandra saw the Demon smirk again, and narrowed her eyes.

"Enough, both of you!" she shouted, stepping between them. "You will not trick all of us so easily, Demon. You will not survive this day."

"Such arrogance," Ardor purred, smiling. "You who have been showered with so much, still demand attention and praise for all that you do. It is a wonder that your own Demon has not taken you over yet."

"What in the Maker's name are you talking about?"

"Every mage has a Demon that chooses them, for that special quality in their soul that only we can sense. I had my eyes on Jowan long before he ever met his woman, as Hauteur had its sights on you when you were still an apprentice." A ripple in the Fade appeared next to Ardor, and when it was gone, Cassandra's eyes widened in terror. A Pride Demon- **Her** Pride Demon was standing there, all its eyes fixed on her.

"So we meet again, little mortal. I had so been looking forward to this."

"Stay away from me!" she cried, backing up quickly. Anders moved in front of her, forcing down his own fear at the sight of the Demon. Though Merrill's had been of this class as well, he sensed that this one was more powerful.

"You will not have her," he vowed. Hauteur merely grinned, showing off a mouthful of long, pointed teeth.

"Yes, I will. Just as your own Demons will feast on your souls." Two more ripples appeared, and each left behind their own Demon: A Sloth and Rage one. Neria shrank back, hands over her mouth in horror. "Just because we are Demons, does not mean we do not have allies. The Harrowing brings us all together to watch the dance between our kind and yours. We all remember the mortals who win, for they are worth watching to see when the better time to strike will be."

"It has been so long, my dear," the Sloth Demon sighed as it looked at Neria. "In case you have forgotten, I am Malaise. I look forward to working with you this time."

"Never!" she shot back, even as her body began trembling.

"I say kill them all now!" the Rage Demon shouted, clawed hands flexing.

"This is still Ardor's Realm, Rancor," Malaise reminded the creature. "You must wait until she gives the word to play with your mortal."

"I'll send you to the Void first!" Anders vowed, keeping himself between the women and the Demons. Jowan was staring at all of them, and then felt hands slide over his shoulders as Ardor's breath tickled his ear.

"What say you, Jowan? Which side do you wish to be on? Ours, or theirs?" He looked once more to the other mages. Neria looked absolutely terrified, and Cassandra couldn't quite choose between anger or fear. Anders was the only one that seemed to have any resolve left, and he turned to face the blood mage.

"Don't you dare betray us again!" Jowan closed his eyes, remembering his time at the Circle, and everything he'd had to endure in the years since leaving it. They had abandoned him. They had wanted him dead for trying to protect Lily.

"They must pay," Ardor finished for him, a smile on her lips.

"Yes, they must," he agreed, sagging into the Desire Demon, who looked at its allies. All of them had eager looks on their faces.

"Kill the mortals." And the fighting began.

* * *

><p>Back in the chamber, Alistair was pacing, watching the still forms of the mages. He'd been in the Fade once, but had been tricked by a Demon so easily… Had Cassie not snapped him out of his reverie, he might have stayed its slave until he died. "What's taking them so long?" he demanded.<p>

"This isn't an easy process, my King," Finn replied. "Demons are clever, and sometimes finding them is a battle unto itself."

"They'll be all right," Merrill predicted, smiling at the blonde. "Cassandra doesn't ever give up when she sets her mind on something, and Anders can be just as stubborn. And with Neria there, they have a voice to stand with Jowan."

"I trust the Commander to have the situation well in hand," Justice agreed, leaning against the wall. Caden was standing by the door, when he heard soft footsteps approaching. He turned his head just as the door opened, revealing a very panicked-looking Deborah. She ran into the room, Petra at her heels.

"Sweetie, please come back!" the mage called out, fear on her face. Alistair immediately grabbed the child, hoisting her up, but she struggled in his grasp.

"Put me down! Put me down!" she begged, tears beginning to form in her eyes.

"Deborah, what's the matter? What happened?" he asked, trying to hug her. She still resisted, pushing against him with all her strength.

"She suddenly started yelling about her parents being in trouble and took off. I didn't even know that she knew about this room," Petra explained.

"Oh dear. This isn't good," Alistair said, eyes widening. Cassandra had told him that she thought the child was empathic, and therefore a budding mage. But for her to be able to sense what was happening in the Fade?

"Mama! Papa!" she cried out, now reaching her arms towards their bodies. "Help them! Help them!" She managed to wriggle out of the King's grasp, running to Cassandra and gently touching her shoulder. "Mama, wake up! Wake up!"

"Deborah, they can't wake up. Not until they're done," Merrill tried to tell her. Caden walked over to the little girl, putting a hand on her back. She turned and flung her arms around him, sobbing.

"Hurt. Mama and Papa are hurt," she managed to choke out. The Prince embraced her, looking at the other adults.

"How can we help them?" he asked. Justice pushed away from the wall, resolve clear in his clouded eyes.

"I will go. All of you are in danger from the Demons. I am not."

"But Justice… Will you be able to come back?" Alistair wondered. The Spirit paused for a moment, head down. Then he looked at Deborah, his gaze shifting to the other mages, finally coming to rest on Anders.

"I do not know. But my friend is in danger, and I must help him. If I can return to your world after this, I will, but now… Now I must go home, to help them."

"Are you sure you don't need any help?" The Spirit smiled at the King.

"I will send out a call for aid once I am there. It will be answered, trust me." Then he touched the font, a shudder running through the body as it slumped to the floor. Caden pulled Deborah back, trying to calm her.

"They'll be all right," he promised. "Justice will save them, you'll see."

* * *

><p>Cassandra knew she was on her last legs, but she wasn't about to let the Demon get the better of her now. She flung another fireball at it, catching Hauteur in the arm, and it paused for a moment. "I will not let you take me without a fight!"<p>

"Good, I would hate for this to be easy," it replied with a chuckle. "But tell me, my dear mage, what will you do about your friends?" She stiffened for a moment, realizing that all of them were fighting these creatures on a one-on-one basis. Well, all except for Jowan, who was sitting with Ardor wrapped around him like damn snake. Neria was practically cowering from Malaise, who had her cornered against a wall. And Anders was doing his best to freeze Rancor, while the Rage Demon was trying to char him in turn. No one was without injuries, but their healer was too tied up to help. "Starting to see how hopeless this is?"

"As long as I draw breath, it will never be over," she vowed, lightning now answering her call. He caught her spell though, redirecting it at Neria, who screamed. Anders tried to get a quick heal spell on the Elf, but Rancor caught him across the chest with a swipe of his claw, and he collapsed. Cassandra backpedaled, her eyes once more focusing on Jowan. "Help us! Fight back!" she pleaded.

"Leave my poor Jowan alone," Ardor chided, stroking his hair. "You have forced him to suffer long enough. Now he will finally have all that he wished for."

"Jowan, you can't believe what that thing says! It's lied to you before, and it's lying to you now!"

"She's going to help me get Lily," he retorted, voice soft. "And then we'll be together, just like I promised her all those years ago." Cassandra grit her teeth, feeling the anger wash over her.

"You stupid idiot! All you'll do is bring the Chantry down on us even harder! Think about this, Jowan. Lily didn't trust you because you were a blood mage. Do you honestly think her views have changed?" He looked up at her then, confusion on his face.

"But now I can make her see that she doesn't need to fear me. That I'm not some evil maleficar-"

"Yes you **are**!" Anders yelled, shakily regaining his feet. Blood dripped from the gash in his chest, and he was glad that this was only the Fade. "You are a coward, a liar, and a traitor!" Jowan stood now, anger flashing in his eyes.

"Shut up!" he shouted, fists clenched at his side. "I am so sick of you judging me! You're the coward who kept running away from all your problems at the Circle. The only reason you aren't dead is because Cassandra saved you from the Templars. And Justice told me that it was you who started this war with the Divine. You're to blame for all this!" He shot a bolt of lightning at Anders, and Cassandra realized that he didn't even have enough strength to get out of the way.

"NO!" she screamed, trying to move to him. But Hauteur grabbed her around the waist, lifting her off the ground. However, a blade was suddenly in front of the healer, parrying the spell to the ground. And then a warrior in glowing full plate stepped fully in front of him, shield in a defensive position.

"It appears I have good timing, Commander."

"Justice? Thank the Maker!" Anders said, slumping back down. The Spirit nodded at him, and then raised his sword over his head. A blinding light came from it, forcing everyone to close their eyes for a moment. Cassandra felt herself drop to the ground, and quickly scurried away from the Pride Demon.

"What was that?" Ardor demanded, getting to her feet.

"A call for aid," Justice replied, diving at Rancor. The Rage Demon slid back quickly, narrowly avoiding the bite of the sword. Cassandra and Neria made their way to the healer, dropping to the ground at his side.

"You two all right?" the Warden mage asked.

"Never better," the healer lied, holding his chest.

"Cassandra, he can't win alone," Neria said, watching the other Demons join in.

"I know. Hopefully his call is answered quickly."

"We have to help him," Anders told them, trying to stand once more. But his legs gave out, and he just sat there, gritting his teeth in pain.

"We're in no shape to do anything," the Hero told him, putting a hand on his back. "He'll be fine. Justice isn't stupid." Said Spirit was trying to now fight off all four Demons at once, and barely succeeding. However, he felt a shift in the Fade, and then another sword sliced into Malaise, causing the Sloth Demon to pull back.

"It seems you are in need of aid, Brother."

"Good to see you, Valor." The two fighters now attacked as one, and Cassandra realized that she knew this particular Spirit: He had been the one in her Harrowing, who she'd persuaded to give her a staff to fight the Demon. And now two more Spirits stood in front of them, creating a barrier before joining the fray. One seemed to be a bearded man holding a staff, and he joined the two fighters. The other appeared to be a young woman, and she drifted over to Jowan, gently touching his shoulder. He looked up and gasped. The Spirit looked like Lily!

"Are… Are you a trick too?" he wondered. The Spirit smiled at him.

"No Jowan, I am no trick. Ardor would have kept you believing that she could give you the woman you pine for, but alas… That is not within her power to grant."

"Then… What are you?"

"I am a Spirit that embodies Love. Your soul called out to me for acceptance and soothing. I apologize for not revealing myself sooner, but I would have been unable to fight against Ardor myself."

"If you're Love, can you get me Lily?" She pulled him up, shaking her head sadly. "But why not?"

"If you truly love her, Jowan, you will allow her her freedom. Ardor would have had you enslave her. It would not have been true feelings you saw from her." He blushed and looked at the ground.

"I've been such a fool, haven't I?"

"There is still time to fix things. You still retain your strength. Come, help us fight against these Demons." He nodded, resolve settling on his face as she took his hand. With a crackle of lightning, Jowan joined in the fight. Love walked back over to the other mages, a light shining around her. She gently touched each of them, healing their wounds as she did. They all stood up, nodding at each other and the Spirit before also getting back into the fray. Now with a Spirit aiding each of them, the Demons stood little chance. Malaise fell first, followed by Ardor. Rancor dropped as well after Anders caught it in an ice storm and Justice shattered it. Hauteur tried to swipe at Cassandra one final time, but Valor cut its arms off, and she hurled a fireball at it. With a roar, the Demon disintegrated, and the mages all dropped to their knees, exhausted.

"We won," Neria said, hugging Jowan. "I knew you could do it!"

"You were all very brave," the old man Spirit said with a smile. "Especially you, Neria." She blushed and shook her head.

"Only because you were at my side. You gave me the courage to face Malaise."

"I am Willpower, so I could do no less for you." She suddenly started fading, and after a moment, she was gone. "Ah, it seems her task here was finished."

"Then we should be waking up soon too," Anders realized. He walked over to Justice, and the Spirit seemed to brighten for a moment. "You saved me."

"As you did for me all those years ago." He frowned.

"Justice, I twisted you with my emotions. You became-"

"That is unimportant now, my friend," the Spirit interrupted, placing a hand on his shoulder. "What matters now is that we both return to helping mages."

"But… Can you leave the Fade again?"

"I do not think so. But I had an idea that would benefit us all."

"What is it?" Cassandra wondered.

"Demons are the real threat to mages. It is why the Chantry fears you, and it is why the common people despise you. But if there were no more Demons to prey upon mortals, the world would be much safer." The three remaining mages' eyes widened.

"Are you going to hunt Demons then?"

"Yes Anders," Justice replied with a nod. "We will find more Spirits to help us, and make the Fade a safe place once more." He extended a hand to the healer, who grasped it, tears in his eyes.

"Goodbye my friend. May the Maker watch over you."

"May He watch over you as well," the Spirit replied. Anders began fading, and then it was just Cassandra and Jowan. Justice turned to face her, and she took his outstretched hand without hesitation. "Commander, it has been an honor to fight once more at your side."

"Likewise Justice. Thank you for saving us."

"Thank your daughter. She realized something was wrong, and that is why I am here." Her eyes widened as a smile flashed across her face. Justice put a hand to his chest and dipped his head in salute, stepping back. Valor came up to her, seeming happy.

"You have grown into a fine mage," he praised.

"I couldn't have defeated that Demon without your help though. Either time."

"You know when to seek help, which is always a good thing. I fear that we will not meet again, but it has been a pleasure to fight with you."

"I feel the same, Valor," she replied, shaking his hand. Jowan came up next to her, looking apprehensive.

"May I ask a favor of you Spirits?" They all turned to look at him. "I… I know I don't deserve another chance. Not after betraying my friends again. But I want to help you fight against the Demons. Everyone else is trying to help mages, but I… I've been a coward for too long."

"Jowan, if you stay in the Fade too long-"

"I'll never be able to return," he finished, smiling sadly at his fellow mage. "It's all right though. There's nothing for me to really return to. I can't face Neria or any of the others after what I did. But this… This will allow me to atone for all that I've done. And as long as I have their support, I won't falter." Love took his hand, smiling softly.

"You will become a Spirit under my care then, Jowan. We will help you sever the ties to your mortal body, and then you shall come with us, to fight against the Demons." Cassandra sighed, putting a hand on his shoulder.

"Are you sure this is what you want? There's no going back."

"I know," he assured her. "Just… Tell Neria I'm sorry for all the hurt I caused her. I never meant for any of this."

"I'll tell her. Andraste guide you, Jowan." She felt the world shift slightly, her vision beginning to blur.

"May you live a long life with your family, Cassandra." Then darkness engulfed her, and she left the Fade.

* * *

><p>Cassandra groaned softly, feeling like her head was going to explode. She then felt hands on her face and shoulders, and quickly opened her eyes. Alistair, Anders, and Deborah were all hovering over her, worry on their faces. "Thank the Maker!" the King said, pulling her into an embrace.<p>

"Mama's okay!" Anders hugged the little girl, closing his eyes.

"She's okay," he agreed, voice barely above a whisper. When Alistair had let her go, she got slowly to her feet, holding her head as the pounding stopped.

"Jowan should be back soon then," Neria predicted, standing over his body. Cassandra sighed and shook her head, walking over to the Elf.

"Neria… He's not coming back. Justice and the other Spirits are going to hunt Demons in the Fade, to help keep mages safe. Jowan went with them."

"What?" she asked, eyes wide. "But, he's mortal, how can-"

"I'm not sure. But he asked me to say that he was sorry he hurt you." Neria looked down at the body, seeing the chest barely rise and fall. Tears came to her eyes, and then she wrapped her arms around Cassandra and cried into her shoulder.

"That idiot… I would have forgiven him!"

"I know, but he couldn't forgive himself."

"What do we do with him, then?" Finn wondered.

"We'll keep him in the infirmary until the body… Dies, I guess," Anders offered.

"Maybe he'll become a Dreamer, like a boy we met in Kirkwall," Merrill said.

"Stranger things have happened," the healer agreed. Neria finally let go of Cassandra, and allowed Petra to lead her from the room. Deborah stretched her arms out to her "mother", and Anders pulled her into a tight hug. Alistair wrapped his arms around all of them, and Caden clung to his Father's leg. Merrill and Finn slipped out of the room, leaving the "family" to themselves.

"Don't scare me like that again," Alistair warned. "Either one of you. If it hadn't been for Deborah… I'm not sure what would have happened."

"How did you know we needed help, little one?" Cassandra asked. The girl shrugged, looking puzzled.

"I just did." She glanced down at the body that Justice had been in. "Gone?"

"He went home," Anders explained. "Maybe you'll see him in your dreams."

"Speaking of home, a messenger arrived from Denerim not too long ago, apparently," Alistair mentioned. "Levi told him we might be a while, but apparently it's a rather urgent message. Do you want me to handle it, or shall we go together?"

"If it's just Anora wondering when you'll be home, I swear…" Cassandra sighed, rubbing her temples. "Let's go see what earth-shattering matter requires our attention now." The men started snickering as she led them all to the main hall.

* * *

><p>The messenger was pacing the main hall when they arrived, and he looked relieved to see them. "Your Highness, and Lady Amell, it is good to see you."<p>

"Please dispense with the pleasantries," she ordered, hands on her hips. The messenger bowed and handed her a sealed scroll.

"This was sent from the delegation from the Free Marches, who are currently staying in Denerim. I was told to give it only to you, Hero." Cassandra raised an eyebrow as she took the scroll, noting the curious seal on it before she broke it: It seemed to be a stylized bird of some kind. When she unrolled it and began reading the neat script on it though, her breath hitched in her throat.

"Mama?"

"Cassie, what's wrong?" Anders asked, holding Deborah a little tighter.

"It's from the Champion of Kirkwall." The other mage rolled his eyes.

"Oh, and what does the Templars' tool want with you?"

"My help, apparently. She doesn't say what, only that it's of the utmost importance, and she needs to see me in person."

"I don't like this," Alistair muttered, shaking his head.

"Neither do I… But what's the worst she could do?"

"Demand you turn me over to the Chantry?" Anders shot back.

"Have you arrested for attacking her on the Wounded Coast?" Alistair added.

"Father, if she's come to arrest Aunt Cassandra, you won't just let them take her, will you?" Caden asked, tilting his head.

"No, of course not!" the King replied, a scowl on his face. "But why would she come herself? There's more going on than that letter tells us."

"Agreed. Which is why I'm going back with you to Denerim."

"But Cassie-"

"Anders, please just trust me. If Danielle Hawke really needs my help, it might give us a leg up on dealing with any political issues with Kirkwall and Starkhaven. And before you ask, no you can't come with me. If it is a trap, I'm the only one who should fall to it. Someone needs to be here for Deborah and the school." The healer nodded, sighing heavily. Alistair patted his shoulder and smiled.

"Caden and I will be her bodyguards, I promise. If anyone so much as raises their voice to her, we'll show them some good old Ferelden steel." The two men smiled at one another, and Cassandra kissed Anders, and then hugged Deborah.

"Come back soon," the little girl told her.

"I will, sweetie. Now then, I'll just pack some essentials, deal with Justice's and Jowan's bodies, and we'll be off. With any luck, I'll be back in a week's time, and we'll never have to deal with the Champion again." Alistair shook his head, chuckling.

"We should be so lucky," he quipped, as they left to help her get ready.


	14. Family Reunion

One more chapter to go, and this tale will be wrapped up...

Chapter 14: Family Reunion

Denerim was still the same bustling, noisy city it had always been, and Cassandra realized that a part of her had missed the place she'd called home after the Blight. Anora met them at the gate to the palace, a frown on her face. "Dear husband, is there a reason that we've received such… Unlikely visitors?" she demanded, tapping her foot.

"Your guess is as good as mine," Alistair replied with a shrug. "Caden, go with your mother. Cassandra and I will see what this delegation wants." The boy nodded, a brief look of disappointment flitting across his face before he followed Anora inside. The King and the Hero headed for the main meeting room, and the guards at the door bowed as they entered. And inside the room, seated at the large table, were two people. One was the Templar who'd told them to return to Ferelden, and the other was the Champion of Kirkwall herself.

"Thank you for-" the Templar started, before Cassandra cut him off, looking squarely at the mage when she spoke..

"You have a lot of nerve coming here, Templar pet."

"Cassie, remember your temper," Alistair cautioned. She rolled her eyes and sighed, pressing her fingers to her temples.

"Why are you here?"

"We came seeking asylum." The two Wardens stared dumbstruck at them.

"Asylum?" Alistair asked after a minute. "But… Your sister rules Kirkwall and Starkhaven. What in the Maker's name do you have to run from?"

"My husband," Hawke said as she stood. And now Cassandra saw they she held something in her arms: A small bundle that was wrapped in a white blanket emblazoned with the Vael family crest.

"You've had a child?" The Champion nodded, though she seemed sad.

"Yes. A little boy, to carry on the Vael name. Sebastian was very proud."

"A sense a "but" coming," Alistair ventured, folding his arms across his chest.

"He doesn't want the baby to be a mage," Carver offered, also looking bothered. Cassandra was still confused as to why they were here, and she didn't like feeling this way. Something was amiss, and they were stalling on the reason.

"Andraste's flaming knickers, just spit it out!" she ordered. Both Hawke and Carver pulled back, and the baby whimpered a bit before his mother rocked him gently.

"A mage cannot hold a title, cannot stay with their family. If Corbis turns out to be one… Sebastian offered to make a deal with the ruling families for him to stay on the throne." Hawke hugged her son tighter, and Cassandra felt very uneasy about whatever this "deal" was.

"But he'd still be a mage," Alistair argued gently. "So how-"

"Sebastian would Tranquil him," Carver stated, jaw clenched tight. The Hero's eyes widened, and her chest felt tight for a moment. A child. He wanted to Tranquil a child. And **his** child. Had the world gone mad when she wasn't looking?  
>"Maker have mercy," the King whispered.<p>

"So you came to Ferelden in the hopes that we would shelter you? I don't know what they teach in the Free Marches, Champion, but that would start a war between Denerim, Kirkwall, and Starkhaven. Wouldn't it?"

"Actually, I just want you to take Corbis." The shocked looks on everyone's faces made the Champion frown. "What?"

"Let me get this straight: You want me to take your son and disappear back to wherever I've been, in the hope that your husband will not lay siege to my country trying to find him? Are you mad?"

"Then what do you suggest?" Hawke demanded, tears in her eyes. "I… I cannot let Sebastian do that to my son!"

"Then just kill him, like you were going to kill those children before I stopped you." Her cousin's eyes widened, and Cassandra knew she'd struck a nerve.

"He's my **son**!"

"What, just because those children weren't your flesh and blood, it made it all right? Somewhere they have parents. Parents who want them to live and become good people. As it is, that woman your husband shot in the back won't get to see her daughter grow up. You stole that from both of them. What makes your son more special?"

"You've never had a child, have you?" The women stared at each other, eyes narrowing. Hawke was treading on dangerous ground, but she didn't care.

"I'm tainted, Champion. It's practically impossible for me to have a child. But what difference does that make?"

"When you hold your own child for the first time, you swear to the Maker that you will die before you let any harm come to them. I never liked the Tranquil, even when I saw them every day. No, they aren't mages, but they aren't people either. They're shells. When I first met Anders, and agreed to help him with his friend… When I saw the drastic change from mage to Tranquil…"

"Karl. But why were you going to help Anders break him out of the Circle?"

"We weren't," Carver revealed.

"I was hoping that Anders might see that Karl was better off in the Circle, and leave him there. But when we got there, and he was already Tranquil… It was too much, both for Anders and for me."

"For you? Don't make me laugh!" Cassandra shot back. "If it had been too much, you would have supported Anders. Karl had been Harrowed, and making him Tranquil was illegal no matter how you look at it. Your precious Knight Commander was a paranoid lunatic even back then."

"Be that as it may," Hawke said with a shake of her head. "It would kill me to see my son turned into… That. No more laughter, no more happiness, not even any more crying. A child doesn't deserve that, and I'm not waiting around to see if he is a mage. Because once his powers manifest, it'll be too late, and I'll lose him. Please cousin, help me! Help me save him."

"Cassie, she's desperate," Alistair added, coming up beside her. "No one else would take in a potential mage and keep him safe. And besides: He is family."

"I know," she admitted, sighing heavily. "But I'm not about to strip another child from his parents. And I might regret this, but it's the right thing to do." She stared at Hawke, who seemed confused. "You're coming with me. Both of you."

"What?" the siblings asked, shock clear on their faces.

"Look, if the baby disappears, or if just the Champion and the baby do, then that means that someone knows what happened, and Sebastian will keep questioning you until he learns the truth. If all three of you vanish-"  
>"You aren't worried he'll march an army here to find us?"<p>

"If he does without telling me, he risks open war," the King replied, eyes narrowed slightly. "And with this whole Mage-Templar thing going on, I doubt he'd risk that. No, he'll send someone to ask when the last time we saw you was, and what you were here for. But without proof of our involvement, he can't do anything."

"So once you leave Denerim, I'll find you on the road and lead you to my home. But Andraste as my witness, if you harm **anyone** there, I will personally roast you alive and leave you for the wolves." By the dark light in the Hero's eyes, neither of the Hawke siblings wanted to test her threat. "Now get your things and prepare to depart. The sooner we get you out of here, the better I'll feel."

"Should I tell Anora?"

"Alistair, the less she knows, the better. I'd rather not have her use this against me if she ever feels I'm a true threat to her." He kissed her forehead, smiling mischievously.

"I'm sure you could take her, sweetheart. After all, you did defeat her father. And he was an actual warrior."

"We'll just leave to get our things," Hawke said softly, edging towards the door. "And cousin… Thank you."

"Don't thank me yet. I still have to convince the other mages that you deserve to stay with us. And with it being the Champion and her Templar brother, it's going to be an interesting conversation."

* * *

><p>Every adult mage at Soldier's Peak was staring at the newcomers. Some seemed apprehensive, others annoyed, and some didn't know what to think. "Are you insane?" Anders' voice thundered above everyone.<p>

"You're the one who didn't want me killing them," she reminded him, smirk firmly in place.

"Yes, but… Cassie, Hawke hates her own people. And her brother is a Templar. They're the ones we've been fighting against this past year."

"We won't cause any trouble," the Champion promised, clutching the baby to her chest. Carver placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. He felt uneasy, especially since the Hero had made him leave his weapon with the blacksmith for "safe keeping". But here they were surrounded, and if one of the mages chose to attack…

"Then why are you here?" That was Merrill's voice, and she stepped forward, a man at her back. Hawke felt her eyes widen as she realized the Dalish girl was pregnant.

"Merrill, if anyone will understand, it'll be you," she pleaded. "Sebastian wanted to turn my son Tranquil if he's a mage. Please, I have nowhere else to go." Shocked looks and murmurs made their way around the room, and Anders came up to Cassandra.

"His own child?" the healer whispered. She nodded, shivering a little

"According to my cousin, yes. I couldn't let any harm come to an innocent. I'd be a hypocrite otherwise. I'm sorry I didn't send word ahead of our arrival, but I just wanted to get here as fast as we could."

"Starkhaven will send out search parties."

"They won't find us, Anders. Even if they do, we can deal with them. This is a sanctuary for us, and I won't let anyone violate it." The door to the meeting room creaked open, and they all turned to stare at Deborah, who ran straight to Cassandra, arms out.

"Mama!" she cried, throwing herself at the Hero, who caught her and swung her onto her hip, smiling. "You're back!"

"I'm back." Hawke and Carver seemed confused as the little girl shifted her attention to them.

"I thought you said-"

"This is the little girl whose mother you killed," Anders explained, wrapping his arms protectively around his two ladies. "We're raising her."

"I'm sorry," Hawke said, hanging her head. "You do sort of know what I'm going through then."

"I'd give everything I am to protect her," Cassandra told her. "But I would do the same for anyone here as well. We're all family at the Peak, and we all fight for each other. If you're going to stay here, we expect the same from you two as well."

"But… I'm a Templar," Carver pointed out. "The enemy."

"Templars are only the enemy if they wish to subjugate or harm us," Alain wisely stated. "I saw enough good Templars in Kirkwall to know that we should not judge them all by their armor."

"Besides, we can use you in our lessons," Petra added. "Having our students know what to expect from the Chantry will be immensely helpful. The King did his best, but he wasn't here all the time."

"Wait, King Alistair is a Templar?"

"Sort of," Cassandra told the younger man. "He never took his vows, and never became addicted to lyrium, but he knew all their abilities. Petra's right about helping though, and maybe you'll start seeing that we're not as dangerous as you think."

"What about me?" Hawke asked softly. "What can I do to help?"

"You're a healer, right? You can help in the infirmary," Anders offered with a sigh. "That way I can keep an eye on you."

"I'm not going to jeopardize our refuge. I swear that before the Maker."

"We'll see," the healer shot back.

"Baby's name?" Deborah piped up, smiling slightly. Hawke appeared startled, but then smiled as she walked closer, giving the little girl a good look at her son. He had his mother's blue eyes, but his silky hair was dark, much like his father's. Sucking on his fist, he stared at the little girl, and as she smiled, he gurgled and smiled back.

"Corbis. He was named after his great-grandfather, who was Prince of Starkhaven. What's your name?"

"Deborah. I like you!" Cassandra smiled at her cousin, who nodded.

"Well, that's as much a seal of approval as you get around here. I'll show you to your quarters, and then we'll discuss your exact obligations while you're here." She handed Deborah to Anders, who still looked uneasy.

"I hope you know what you're doing, Cassie."

"Me too."

* * *

><p>A few weeks had passed, and the Hawke siblings were getting used to life with the mages. Alistair had sent a letter telling her that Starkhaven was demanding help in searching for the "kidnappers" of the Champion and Viscount of Kirkwall, but Ferelden's official policy was "sorry, we've got our own problems to worry about". In the days that had followed her return to the Peak, Cassandra had grown increasingly bothered by something, and took to locking herself in her private study, high at the top of Avernus' old tower. Not even Anders was allowed in when she was working, and the entire school was becoming concerned. Finally, Hawke could stand it no longer, and walked up the rickety steps to the top, banging on the door until it opened. "What?" Cassandra yelled, clearly frustrated at being disturbed.<p>

"We need to talk."

"No, "we" don't. I'm in the middle of some research and want to be left alone." As the door started to shut, the Champion frowned and shoved Corbis at her cousin, who appeared startled as she took the baby. "What are you-"

"Distracting you," the blonde answered, pushing her way inside the room. There were books and papers scattered everywhere, and potions bubbling on a small hearth. "What is it you're so obsessed with? Everyone's worried."

"Everyone needs to mind their own bloody business." Cassandra glowered a bit, but finally sighed and sat down at the desk, still holding the baby, who looked up at her with his bright eyes. "You fight dirty."

"A trick I learned from you, I think," Hawke shot back as she pulled another chair up and sat down. "But why all the secrecy, cousin? I've heard the stories of the mage who used to work here. You're not… Please tell me blood magick isn't involved."

"Oh for the love of Andraste! No! I will never practice that foul craft, and anyone who accuses me of doing so is asking for a fireball right up their arse!" Corbis began crying at her outburst, and the Hero immediately rocked him gently, shushing him until he was once again calm. "You wouldn't understand," she finally said.

"Try me."

"You have a child of your own. I love Deborah like she is my real daughter, but… But it still pains me that I cannot have a baby. That for all the love I give to both Alistair and Anders, I will never be able to have a true family."

"But the King has a son. With the Queen."

"Yes, because Anora isn't a Warden. He got lucky, and Caden is a wonderful boy that Alistair cherishes above all else. But I will always be standing in the shadows, wishing that I had been the one to conceive him. That's what I'm doing up here." Hawke looked confused for a moment.

"You're trying to have a baby? Correct me if I'm wrong, but don't you need a man for that?" The Warden gave her cousin a sideways glance and rolled her eyes.

"I'm trying to see if I can hold off the taint long enough to have a child. I… I already have a way that will guarantee conception."

"Oh? This isn't anything I've ever heard of."

"Considering how it's from the grimoire of Flemeth, the Witch of the Wilds, I doubt you have." The Champion's eyes widened and her jaw dropped. "Oh, so you've heard of her before?"

"I've met her. Twice. She saved my family when we were escaping the Blight, and then I apparently carried a piece of her… Soul in an amulet to Sundermount, near Kirkwall. She told me that it was in case the inevitable had happened." It was Cassandra's turn to look confused, but then the pieces clicked into place.

"That "inevitable" would be me killing her. Or at least a piece. Should have known that Flemeth wouldn't be that foolish to just stay in the Wilds with the darkspawn on her doorstep."

"You know, it's actually thanks to Flemeth that I'm here now."

"Okay, you're going to have to explain that a bit better." Hawke sighed and took her son back, rocking him gently.

"When she was released on Sundermount, she told me that we were standing on a "precipice of change" and the world was fearing a plummet into the abyss. But she said that I had to look for that moment, and when I found it, not be afraid to leap. "For it is only when you are falling, that you learn if you can fly" is what she said."

"Says the woman who could turn into a dragon," Cassandra shot back with a smirk. Hawke nodded and sighed heavily.

"When I learned what Sebastian wanted to do, I figured that this was my plummet. And so I leapt. Straight towards you, and everything you stood for."

"Even though I tried to kill you?"

"I suppose I deserved it, didn't I? After all, I was basically trying to murder children. I was blind to what the Knight Commander was doing, because I believed that she spoke with the Maker's authority. Anders was right about her, though: She was a lunatic, and corrupt."

"I heard that your group was forced to kill her. What happened?" Hawke shivered for a moment, and Cassandra stood and walked to her, placing a gentle hand on her shoulder. "Take your time. I understand."

"She'd gotten her hands on an idol we'd found in the Deep Roads: A thing made of pure lyrium. But Meredith made it into a sword, and it drove her mad. She saw blood mages everywhere, and refused to stand down when Knight Captain Cullen ordered her to, for the good of the City. She attacked us, and the Templars, but we managed to stop her. But the lyrium… The sword shattered, and I think it took her soul. All that was left was a twisted, metal… Statue. I can still see the red light shining out of it. Knight Captain Cullen declared us saviors of Kirkwall, and I was made Viscount. But I don't really feel that I saved anyone, to be honest. After all, we'd killed innocent people in the name of the Maker. It was Anders who blew up the Chantry, not the Circle. Why did Meredith treat them as enemies?"

"Because it was the easiest thing for her to do. She might have been content with just Anders' death, but his actions gave her a reason to wipe out every mage in Kirkwall. No mages meant no blood mages, and no blood mages meant no Demons. The City would be safe, and she would be a hero to the people. You were an inconvenience, and she would probably have accused you of working blood magick had she been successful in killing you and your friends."

"I never wanted any sort of power!" Hawke argued, tears in her eyes. "I just wanted to protect people!"

"I know, and you did what you thought was right."

"But it wasn't. If you hadn't been there, I would have… Those children-" Cassandra suddenly wrapped the other woman in a hug, being careful of the baby.

"Those children are safe, and learning to master their powers. I admit, I was ready to kill you that day, but cooler heads prevailed."

"Anders stopped you. He said we needed to know the whole truth. But how was he even there? I killed him… Didn't I?"

"Trust me, that man is stronger than he looks. You didn't kill him, and I managed to rip Justice out of him so that he wouldn't do something so foolish as blowing up a major Chantry again. And now you're here with us, fighting for your son's right to exist as the Maker made him, not how Starkhaven nobility thinks he should be."

"Does it get any easier? Accepting what Fate puts in front of you?" Cassandra scoffed and stood, one hand on her hip as she grinned.

"We make our own Fate, dear cousin. The Maker gave us all free will, and I intend to make the most of that. Mostly by being a thorn in the side of the Chantry until they admit that mages are people too." Hawke nodded and stood, a look of determination in her eyes.

"Then let me help you. Together, we can fight this taint of yours back long enough for you to be a true mother. Let me give that to you, at least." The Hero nodded, a genuine smile gracing her features for a moment as she gazed at the notes and potions lying around the room.

"We have a lot of work to do. Let's get started."


End file.
